Sociopath

by Patric Gagne

“This makes no sense,” I’d said to him once, watching him pack for a trip home. “You say you hate going to your uncle’s for Christmas. You tell me he’s an asshole, and every year he picks a fight with your mom. Everyone always ends up crying. So, why are you going? I just don’t get it.” He stopped packing and glanced at me affectionately. “I know you don’t get it,” he said. “And you’re lucky.” Now, lying in bed, semi-wishing I was on a plane flying across the country, I understood what he meant. I hadn’t decided to stay home because going would have made me feel guilty. I’d rejected Max’s invitation because I chose my relationship with David. But in doing so I felt hobbled. I felt weak. It made me think of the second Superman movie, when he has to surrender his powers to be with Lois Lane. I wondered if something similar was happening to me. Is this what I have to do to be with David? I thought. Ignore my sociopathic “superpowers” and live like a normal person? Always make sensible choices? Well, fuck that, I thought. I’d file this one under “Better in Theory.”