Saving Rain

by Kelsey Kingsley

“Good?” “You have no fucking idea.” I took another bite, and as I chewed, I left behind the memory of women and instead thought about a time from even longer ago. A whole other fucking life really, and I said, “The last time I had pizza on my birthday was the only time I had a party. My grandparents—I told you they raised me in the beginning, right?” Harry nodded, a hint of melancholy touching his eyes. “You’ve mentioned it a few times.” I’d known Harry for eight years, and there were only so many things to tell. Hell, it was likely he’d heard this story before too. But he didn’t stop me from telling it. “Right. Anyway, my gramma wanted me to have a normal birthday, I guess, and had me invite a couple of friends over. Billy was one of them. We ordered pizza, and right before I sat down to eat, I went to the bathroom to take a piss and walked in on my mom popping pills.” I studied the pizza crust. The hardened bubbles of sauce. The crispy edges and softer middle. “All my grandparents had ever wanted was to give me a normal childhood while still protecting my mom. She was their only kid. I always got that they genuinely thought they were doing the right thing, and I don’t blame them for anything ever, but …” “All we can do is our best,” Harry said, injecting a bit of wisdom into my moment of reflection. “Even if our best isn’t all that good at all.” I nodded thoughtfully, turning the piece of crust over in my fingers. “It’s crazy. Like … sometimes, we have these moments, you...