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To all the night owls and midnight lovers who chase their dreams when the sun goes down.
this is my favorite foreword to ever exist btw!!
Not that she’d ever gotten into my pants. Never would, either.
Someone's pants are on fire!!
the last thing I wanted was to be alone at the bar with him, allowing the opportunity to pick apart and replay everything I’d said today.
“But unless I missed it, you didn’t have lunch today. And I don’t want you passing out on me before I can watch Everett score.”
EEEK
This nervous, sweaty-palmed girl was me most days; I just never let him see it.
There were too many handsome guys in too small of a space, and my nerves weren’t sure they could handle it.
ME.
“Creative Cream Pies?”
I sighed as a familiar, embarrassing sense of rejection swirled in my gut.
felt this in my stomach.
“Right now, my apartment looks like I’m unhealthily obsessed with plants, books, and clothes and have no friends,”
ME! TOO!
Because I did have one friend.
Rei rei <3
“You always get food and drinks for other people but never yourself.”
Ope
“Why do you care?” I shot back, instantly defensive as I careened into memories of that night in high school and all the other nights, too. Anxious energy filled my words. “As long as I’m not driving Gemma around, it’s not like it’ll matter to you if I end up in a ditch with a broken neck.”
I looked away, unable to handle the intensity of Julian’s stare or how it made me feel. My heart was already in my throat from thinking about the accident, and now—
Yeah!
This man really liked to act like he was all-powerful sometimes, and it drove me up the wall.
Hehe.
Sometimes it wasn’t worth it. And this was one of those times.
KEEPING UP WITH JULIAN as he took long strides across my parking garage was nearly impossible. The still air made breathing difficult, and sweat began gathering in all its typical spots while I tried not to fall too far behind.
Me when I walk with Rei :)
If I thought I was sweating before, it was nothing to the stickiness on my palms once Julian began intently rolling his sleeves without breaking eye contact. To my shame, I looked away first—just for a second—to watch his fingers capably fold fabric over veiny forearms. Shit. I knew he was trying to make a point, but I hated how effectively he was doing it. “Didn’t realize you were afraid of a little bare skin, Rosie,”
PISSING!!!!
“I’m not afraid of getting dirty, Lily,”
I grabbed my heels without hesitating, eager to put an end to this night. But when I tried to straighten, shoes in hand, my entire world momentarily tipped. Careened. My scream bounced off the walls of the parking garage as a strong arm looped beneath my back and my knees, and I realized—with a fair bit of horror—that Julian was carrying me.
STOP STOP IT RIGHT NOW
Julian and I were like magnets—always had been. We were two same-sided magnets, and the repulsion force was overwhelming. Undeniable. There were times, though, that one of us…flipped. And suddenly, there’d be a pull.
i cant take this rn.
That accident changed everything. Juniper thought it was because I blamed her for it, and that was honestly for the best. Better than her knowing the wake-up call it gave me, the realization it caused me as a teenager of why she got so under my skin, of why her determination to sneak into my family bothered me so much when I— It didn’t matter anymore. The confusion. The anger. It launched a resolution in me, and I hadn’t been able to escape it since. Fuck.
BECAUSE YOU LOVE HER!!!!
Julian hated me.
girl he LOVESSSSS you
I still couldn’t believe he’d carried me through the parking garage.
ME NEITHER
But it vanished when he began shaking his head, rejecting the idea. Rejecting me.
Of course he would protect his special project from me. I’d find a way to fuck it up, wouldn’t I? I’d find a way to ruin something else for him.
I’d remember sex with Juniper St. James.
But there was just something about her that grated on my nerves whenever I saw her.
I stayed up late because nights were when freedom existed.
And I was always so reluctant to give it up. To resign myself to the morning when the sun tended to bring an immediate agenda—one
“If you think anyone could fake being your boyfriend better than me, you’re dead wrong. Name one guy who’s known you as long as I have. Who knows you as well as I do.”
Maybe the large-and-in-charge thing that had landed between my legs was nothing more than a sign that Julian had a healthy, functioning nervous system and superior blood flow.
“Does the thought of a good night’s sleep freak you out that much?”
“You need better headphones, Daisy.”
GAGGEDDDDDD
“Because I didn’t want anyone else to.”
stop.
“Don’t ask for proof unless you’re ready to get it, Juniper.”
HEYYYYYYYY WHATTTTT HELLOOOKK
Sometimes detours were nice. A surprise diversion. New sights that you wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. Old sights but in a new light.
TEARING UP.
One large bed. One set of fluffy white linens. One sleek, black headboard. One.
ONE BED !!!ONE BED!!! I REPEAT!! ONE BED!!!
This was ridiculous. I shouldn’t need encouragement and praise just to eat a goddamn meal.
When Julian finished, he stepped back, appraised his work, and then muttered three words beneath his breath that momentarily halted mine. “There she is.”
This Juniper St. James was still bold and beautiful, still witty and sharp. But she was also vulnerable. And she did care. She cared that her tossing and turning had kept me up last night. She kept apologizing for things she didn’t need to apologize for.
“I’ve spent years fighting my attraction to this woman,” I admitted.
Tell me something I don't know.
I wasn’t much of a dancer outside of the easy sway we had done earlier, but I would become one if Juni asked it of me.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
“Give me one good reason I shouldn’t break all your fucking fingers.”
BAEEEEE
“And I do like you, Daisy,” he breathed, dipping his head to press it against mine. “Stop telling me how I feel.”
If she was going to offer up her mouth for me, I was going to fucking take it.
I gripped her chin between my fingers, holding her there to ensure I could kiss her back and kiss her good. Juniper’s breath hitched when my mouth moved over hers.
“Are you wearing a bra?”
“I’m not wearing one.” Her eyes swam drunkenly as she looked up at me. “But do your hands count? Because I wouldn’t mind wearing them to bed.”
AN ICONNNN!!!!
“Your sweet pussy is gripping my fingers so fucking good. I can only imagine…shit.”
“It’s not enough,” Julian gasped, his wild eyes trailing over me. “That taste, that amazing fucking taste—it’s not enough.”
