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January 19 - February 15, 2024
It would take too much effort to raise my head and look over my shoulder, so I wasn’t able to determine how many of my own people had died. But it didn’t matter. The answer would always be: too many.
War was coming. And it was all my fault.
We all make mistakes. Sure. But the problem was that I hadn’t made a mistake. Levi was now free to attack the north side not because I had made a mistake. No. The King of Metal, the most ruthless dark mage this city had seen in decades, had escaped our fool proof ambush because I had made a choice. Because I had let him escape.
By the Current, what had I done? I had fallen for the enemy. I had fallen for Levi fucking Arden.
He had been so terrified that he had thrown up and almost passed out when he had to stay inside a small lift for less than a minute. I couldn’t even imagine what being locked up in a cell would be like for him. He would lose his mind. And I didn’t want to subject him to that torture.
Guilt sliced through my insides. They were fighting for their lives against a ruthless dark mage, and here I was, trying to decide whether I was yet again going to help him.
“Retreat!” Frank called from somewhere close to the stairwell. “Do it now while he’s distracted.” Part of me wanted to growl that the only reason Levi was distracted was because he was currently busy battering me with relentless attacks.
“Do you really think these people deserve your loyalty?” he asked at last.
You and I are done now, Eve. From this moment on, you’re nothing to me. The next time I see you, you will try to capture me because I’m a dark mage and I will try to kill you because you’re a white boot.
:(
“Goodbye, spitfire.”
“I am going to wipe out the other Houses in the next few weeks. And then I am going to force the Parliament of Malgrave to cede the south side to me.” Across the table, Shinji watched me with a knowing smile on his face, as if he believed every word with his whole soul. “Yes, sir.” I glanced back down at the letter from Ben. “But first, we’re going to get our people back.”
Alarm crackled through my veins since I had absolutely no idea. Just like every time my mind drifted back to Levi fucking Arden, I completely lost track of everything around me because his presence consumed my every thought.
I had to resist the urge to vomit. Or to slaughter them both just for the crime of being too happy and too in love when I… I cut that thought off before I could finish it.
Happy. Who the fuck was happy in this day and age?
Before they could scream and draw unwanted attention, I spoke in a dark voice dripping with threats. “If you open your mouths without permission, I’ll slit your throats. Understood?”
He had just appeared out of nowhere right in the corridor. I hadn’t heard him open the front door. Or walk up the steps. Which meant that there was only one possibility left. This was the worldwalker. As if the universe truly wanted to seal my fate, the pale-eyed man smiled like an absolute villain before speaking a single sentence that made fear rake its icy fingers down my spine. “I’ve been looking for you for a long time.”
Outside the windows, bright sunlight filled the lush green landscape and birds chirped merrily. And as I sat there on my knees with a sword at my throat and a fucking worldwalker as my captor, I couldn’t help but feel as if nature itself was mocking me with its annoying cheerfulness.
“If Arden wants his precious fuck buddy back alive, he’s gonna have to trade his healer for her.” Fear exploded through my chest like poison. Levi was never going to agree to that trade. Even before I had betrayed him, he would never have traded Gemma, the only healer in the entire city, for someone like me. And now, after I hurt him worse than anyone had done since Callan Blackwell faked his death, there was not a chance in a million years that he would ever come for me. In fact, I was pretty sure he would even raise a toast in White’s honor if he did kill me.
Maybe I should have picked the dark side after all.
Wood cracked and a bang tore through the room as the front door was kicked open. I jerked my head up as another tidal wave of fear slammed into me. Christian White had returned to torture me to death after realizing that Levi wasn’t coming. But my heart stopped as my gaze landed on someone else entirely. Fury and insanity roared like hellfire in a pair of sharp gray eyes as they locked on me. For a moment, everything was unnaturally still. As if time itself had stopped moving. Then every shred of humanity evaporated from Levi Arden’s eyes, and he slammed his hands together.
YESSSS LEVI
The last thing I saw was Eve’s shocked eyes as she stared at me. Then the insanity swallowed me whole. * * * Blood. The first thought that trickled through my mind was that everything around me smelled like blood. Again. I blinked. As my vision at last cleared, I once again understood why. All the walls around me were splattered with blood, and there were pools of it on the floor. I glanced down at my hands. At some point, I must have drawn my sword, because I was holding it in my right palm. My hands, and arms all the way up to my elbows, looked like they had been dipped in red. And I could
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HELL YEAH FUCK 'EM UP LEVI
But this was Eve. And I hadn’t wanted her to see this. I hadn’t wanted her to know the true depths of the depravity that I was capable of. Because I didn’t want to see the horrified expression on her face when she looked at me. I didn’t want to see the revulsion that would be written all over her features every time she looked at me from now on. But we were out of time. We had to get the hell out of here before the worldwalker came back, so I couldn’t put this off any longer. Dragging in a shuddering breath, I steeled myself and at last turned to face her. Time stopped moving as I met her
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My mind was still trying to process what I was seeing when she flicked a glance towards the hand I was still bracing on the wall, and concern washed over her features instead. Concern. I didn’t know whether I wanted to laugh or cry or scream. She was concerned. About me. After all that she had just endured, all that she had just seen, she was concerned about me.
“Levi.” My blood froze at the way she said my name. At the way she was looking at me from where she had just barely pushed herself up on her elbows. I had never heard her like that, seen her like that, before. “I can’t walk.” Vulnerability shone in her eyes as she looked back at me. And the pleading note in her voice almost cracked my heart. “They cut my hamstrings.” Rage and pain and insanity surged up inside me again. And it took everything I had to suppress it.
Cries of pain tore from her throat, and the sound of them was like blades scraping across my bones.
“I’ve got you, spitfire,” I whispered as I cradled her to my chest. “I’ve got you.”
i'm not crying, you are
Following her order, I grabbed the hem of Eve’s shirt and pulled it over her head. My heart stalled as it revealed a thin golden necklace with a small ruby at the end. The necklace I had given her before we crashed the alliance celebration. She was still wearing it.
my heart omg
Time lost all meaning as I just continued staring at Eve’s bruised face.
“It’s alright,” I said, keeping my hands raised as I slowly moved towards her. “It’s alright, spitfire. Gemma healed you. You’re safe.”
Without thinking, I rolled over on my side and wrapped my arms around Eve. After what had happened today, I just needed to know that she was okay. That she was here. Alive. Safe. Pulling her close, I held her to my chest and rested my chin on the top of her head. Then I drew in a long breath, and finally felt that awful tightness in my chest loosen slightly. “Levi,” Eve said, her voice soft. I snapped back to reality. Alarm crackled through my veins as I realized that she might not want me to touch her like this. I was just about to yank my arms back and roll away when she spoke again. “Don’t
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AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH
I studied his face again. Now, his features were smoothened with sleep, and there was no insanity left. He almost looked peaceful. Content. Warmth spread through my chest, and I couldn’t stop the soft smile on my lips as I continued watching him. He came for me. Even after everything I had done, everything he had said, he still came for me. On a whim, I reached up and brushed a few strands of hair away from his face.
“You don’t have to be strong all the time, you know. It’s okay to let other people take care of you sometimes.”
I shrugged. “I’ve been through worse.” “Have you?” “No,” I admitted. “Which is why I don’t want to remember what their hands on my skin felt like. I want to replace it. With the hands of someone I trust.”
“When I am done with you, you will only ever remember one set of hands on you for the rest of your life. Mine.”
“What do you want, spitfire?”
“More,” I said. Something flickered in his eyes. Surprise, maybe? But before he could misinterpret my words, I pressed on. “I want you to fuck me again,” I said. “Hard. Dominantly. I want to remember what it feels like to have your hand pinning my wrists to the mattress and your hand wrapped around my throat.” I must have imagined that brief hint of surprise earlier, because his lips immediately curled into a sly smile.
This was what I wanted my brain to remember. Being dominated because I chose it. By someone that I had chosen.
“No. It’s better if we let them deal with Arden first, since he is the greatest threat. Then, once he’s dead, we can swoop in and clean up the rest.” My heart twisted painfully. Once Levi is dead… “What’s wrong?” Ulric asked, probably having seen the pain and dread in my eyes. “It’s just…” I began, fumbling for an answer that didn’t involve me admitting that I had fallen for the King of Metal.
Why did life have to be so damn complicated? I used to always know what the right thing was in any given situation. But now, I had started to see the world the way that Levi did. In shades of gray. And it was destroying me. How was I supposed to be a good constable if I understood a dark mage’s perspective too? If I thanked him for killing the people who had hurt me? If I wanted to help him even when I was angry with him? If I craved the way his naked body felt against mine? If I… loved him? Fuck. I was so doomed.
I had come to the south side tonight to… do what? I wasn’t even sure why I had come here. I had just felt that irresistible tug on my soul and answered its call. It had been so stupid. What if someone had recognized me as a constable?
My heart stuttered in my chest. Levi was walking along one of the roads, heading in my direction.
embers
“Why are you still wearing this?” he asked. My mind finally caught up with reality. Oh. The necklace. The one that Levi had given me. A flicker of embarrassment shot through me. But I kept that annoying emotion firmly off my face and instead flashed him a sharp smile. “To remind myself that no matter how great the sex is, it’s still just meaningless sex.” “You thought the sex was that good, huh? No wonder you were all over me in that cottage.” I snorted and rolled my eyes. “And apparently great sex comes from the biggest dicks.” Surprised laughter ripped from his chest. It was such a genuine
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Part of me had wondered if Eve had told me about the trial so that they could set up another ambush, but the delayed response time when I attacked proved that she had in fact only said it to help me.
The mass of constables who had been chasing me through the north side, the ones who had raced across the Bridge of Life to capture me, had inadvertently saved me.
In a way, it was fitting. That in the end, she would be the one to bring me in. Full circle, and all that. “Sterling?” a man called from what sounded like the front door downstairs. For a second, Eve and I just looked at each other. Since I had no energy left to speak, I said nothing while I waited for her to answer that she had found me. With her eyes still locked on mine, she opened her mouth and called, “All clear!” Shock rippled through my tired soul. Eve’s perceptive brown eyes flicked over my injuries while worry blew across her face. Then determination bled into her eyes instead. But
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If it had been anyone else, anyone but Levi, they would have been dead long ago. But even in the face of all that, the King of Metal was still standing. However, he was cutting it closer and closer. It was just sheer dumb luck that I had spotted the melted metal outside the door before anyone else picked that building to search. Sooner or later, his luck was going to run out.
And because they were all professionals, Tyler and Chris and everyone else glared at me and spat threats in my direction with very convincing venom as I walked away. But on the inside, I was sure they were grinning as much as I was. Mission accomplished.
My mind spun with both shock and relief as I looked at the mass of dark mages before me. My people. The ones who had been mere days away from execution. Mere days away from being killed because of my own stupidity. And now they were here. Free. Safe. And with them back, my Court was now also back to full strength. All because Eve Sterling had let them go.
“I was the one who was fooled by you,” he said, still holding my gaze. “I was the one who walked right into your trap.” Guilt flickered through my soul. But before it could expand, Levi went on. “And now, my people won’t have to pay the price for my own incompetence.” He slid both hands into my hair and cradled my head before kissing me deeply. Then he drew back slightly. With his fingers still in my hair, he rested his forehead against mine and whispered, “Thank you.”
