Slash or Pass (Final Girls)

by Tylor Paige

It wasn’t fair. We’d escaped the Minister. Constantine didn’t. And for that reason, we weren’t allowed to be together. She couldn’t be with anyone at all, not just me, knowing he died trying to save her. This was her eter...

But for the first time, I had something to offer as a rebuttal to her reasonings. She said a lot of things with such passion and pain over the years. Her heart died that day, and she’d never allowed herself to move on. We had escaped. Constantine didn’t. She was right; bu...

“Kansas, I think I’m in trouble.” A single, dull bulb blinked above us, threatening to engulf us in darkness at any moment. I huddled closer to the eleven-year-old boy with the glasses to share warmth. He pulled me in closer, and, teeth chattering, said, “Why do you say that?” “Something happened.” I shivered. “I told a Mother about it and she said the Minister would need to know. That’s why we haven’t gotten any food.”

Kansas took in my words but said nothing. He knew as well as I did that once the Family decided something, they wouldn’t go back on it. We wouldn’t be eating until they decided our punishment was over. It’d been five days. “They’ll come soon. I know it,” he reassured me. We came here together years ago. We were raised with the Family, despite not knowing any of them. We shared all of what we could glean from them with each other. They weren’t coming. “Come on, we’ll get some more water.” He pulled me up with him. “And then we’ll sleep. It saves energy.”

“It’s okay, Eisley, we’ll get through this. It’s just another punishment. We’ve been through this.” He reached the filthy sink, black with mildew, and twisted the old knobs. It squeaked and yellow water poured from it. Kansas picked up the green plastic cup we shared and filled it. We took turns drinking until our empty bellies were full. We’d grown accustomed to this, but it didn’t make it any easier.

I looked up at him in confusion. His eyes were wide and his mouth had fallen open as he stared down at the floor. “Eisley, you’re bleeding.” I looked down. A long trail of red slid down my legs and dripped onto the cement. I dropped his hand quickly and hurried to the bathroom. I shut the old, metal door behind me and reached for the only towel we had. It was thin and ripped and covered in holes, but it was all we had. I shoved it between my legs and began to clean myself, but the blood kept coming.

I’d tried so hard to hide it. Ever since it started, I couldn’t get it to stop. It hurt so much, and yet no one came to help me. I was being punished, but for what, I was still unsure. Kansas pounded on the door. “Eisley, are you okay? Where did you cut yourself? Do we need to see a Mother?” Hot tears stung my cheeks as I continued to stop the bleeding coming from my privates, but nothing worked. “No!” I shouted back. This was why we were being punished. The Mother had said it was normal. How could it be though? There was so much of it!

“Where is Eisley?” the Minister demanded. My heart sped up and my stomach twisted. No! Out of all the family members that could have come through that door, the worst one was always the Minister. “She’s in the bathroom,” Kansas said. “Leave her alone.” Kansas, always the protector argued with him. “We need food.”

“All in good time.” The Minister spoke to him as if Kansas were a petulant child demanding candy. “I hear that Eisley has become a woman.” Something about the way he said that word sent chills down my spine. What did that mean? I was a girl. Eleven. I remembered because that was the one thing they’d let us celebrate. Birthdays were important here. “You leave her alone,” Kansas shouted. “Feed us!”

I shrunk into myself as I stared up at him, my hands still stuffed between my legs, holding the blood-soaked towel. The Minister grinned so wide, I wanted to cry again. His smile was terrifying. If he was giving you attention, that was never a good sign. “There you are. Little Eisley isn’t so little anymore, is she?” I didn’t respond. I had learned not to.

“Leave her alone,” Kansas repeated from behind the tall, thin man in the black robes. The Minister crouched down and reached for my chin. He gripped me tightly, forcing me to look at him. His piercing blue eyes, jet-black hair, and pale skin made for a startling creature. A monster. “One of the Mothers informed me you have begun to bleed. Is that true?” I gulped; my throat dry and scratchy. He reached for the towel I was still clutching and raised it, showing both Kansas and me the blood that stained it.

“She needs to see a Mother,” Kansas said. “She’s hurt.” “She’s not hurt.” The Minister chuckled and stood, letting me go. He shoved the towel into one of his deep pockets. “This is a good thing. A wonderful thing.” “How can it be good?” I peered from behind the Minister to see Kansas shaking with rage. “We’re starving. You’re punishing us because she’s bleeding?” The Minister returned to our room.

“We have been busy, preparing.” “Preparing for what?” Kansas snapped. “The ceremony, Kansas.” The Minister was good at keeping his tone level. He put his hands behind his back and nodded. “We could not attend to you because we needed to focus on getting things ready. I had to buy new video recorders, clothing, and rings. Those things take time.” “We are going to die if you don’t feed us.” Kansas’s resolve began to break. He was as weak and tired as I was. “Please, give us something to eat.” The Minster sighed deeply and nodded. “A Mother will come to attend to you. You will need to be bathed, fed, and dressed before we start the activities.” He turned and grabbed the handle to lock us in, but he paused. He nodded to the corner of the room and then looked back at us.

“Wake up Constantine. We can’t perform the ceremony if he’s dead. We need all three of you.”

“Eisley!” I was jerked awake by Kansas shaking me wildly. Tears made my cheeks itchy, and I sat up and rubbed them vigorously. I blinked, my eyes adjusting to the darkness of my bedroom. Kansas sat beside me, looking at me with concern, and I broke. I threw myself into his arms and sobbed. “Are you all right? I came as soon as I realized what the sound was.” I sniffled and pulled myself up.

Kansas was in only his boxers. Even in the dark, I could see the outline of his toned muscles. But his chest… were those scars? “Where are your glasses?” I asked, trying to divert the conversation.

“On the nightstand by my bed. Eisley, what were you dreaming about?” I wiped my cheeks again. “Nothing. Just… old stuff. I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll be fine....

I stared at the thin red lines on his chest. They reminded me of… an autopsy cut. “Kansas, your chest.” I touched the scars, and he caught my wrist. “Would you like me to stay with you tonight?” he asked, his expression darkening. “Are you sure?” I lifted the ...

Flashes of our kisses, his hands, and his words on the couch ran through my mind, and I quickly pushed them away. “You’ve missed me, haven’t you, princess?” “Eisley?” My nightmare stirred again in my mind. “I can’t be alone.”

Kansas slid under the covers and pulled me into his arms. I faced away from him, letting my back fall against his warm, hard body. I inhaled deeply, taking in the smell of his cologne and bourbon on his breath. After we’d fought, I went to bed early, and he sat downstairs and drank. “You’re still having these dreams?” “Nightmares,” I sighed. “Yeah. You don’t?” “I try to block out that time in our lives. We’re more than that, you know that, right?” I sniffled and moved closer to him. “I know.”

“Hush…” Kansas whispered in my ear. He kissed my lobe and nipped it gently. “Go to sleep. I’m not going anywhere.” I closed my eyes and relaxed against him, falling asleep in his arms.

I woke up the next morning with Kansas’s hand cupping my breast. I shifted slightly and found him still stiff against my back.

“Mm… Good morning,” he murmured, running his thumb across my nipple. A delightful shiver ran down my body. The familiar ache roared between my legs. I forced myself to push him away gently. I sat up and covered myself with the blanket. “Thank you for keeping me company last night. I don’t usually have bad dreams like that.” “Why do I find that hard to believe?” He yawned and propped his head on his elbow. “If it means anything, I like sleeping next to you.” “Even if nothing happens?” I asked. Jealousy wafted over me, thinking about what he’d told me yesterday. That he’d started dating. “I remain hopeful one day it will,” he said matter-of-factly.

My nightmares from last night resurfaced. Constantine’s face, bruised and bloodied, made me pull away from the adult Kansas in my bed. I reached for my ne...

“Kansas, what happened to your chest?” In the light of day, I could see them more clearly now. Two scars formed a V and then slid down into one to his beltline. “My tattoos?” He raised his arms, pointing to tattoos I’d already seen. I shook my head and pointed. “No, the huge scars.” “Just a stupid hazing ritual. I was sewn up just fine.” He traced the scar and then gave me a smile. “Looks pretty cool though, right? I haven’t decided whether to cover them up or not yet.” My jaw dropped. “They should have been kicked out of school for that!” My mind raced as I imagined the scene. Kansas, lying on a table while a group of frat guys cut him as a joke. That wasn’t a joke, that was sadistic. “Eisley, stop worrying about me. I’m fine. This was so long ago. Let’s talk about something else.”

I huffed. “Okay, fine. The first time. Tell me about it.” I wanted to know, had he thought of me when it happened? “First time…” He looked between us, and then motioned to his erection, still standing tall. “You mean sex?” I nodded. “Her name was Harper. She was majoring in archeology. I met her at the university library, where she was working.” “Are you guys the same age? Did you date? How long did you wait?” I wanted to ask so much more, but I held back. I knew I had no right to know these things, yet I felt like I did in a way. Kansas wasn’t Harper’s. He was mine.

“We were the same age,” he responded. “We dated for about two months.” “How long did you date before you guys…” I didn’t want to say it. Even Kansas touching someone else made me sick. “Two weeks.” “Two weeks?” I tossed the blanket off and leapt out of bed. He threw his hands up. “What was I...

“I—I don’t know.” I huffed and began rummaging through my drawers for clothes. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” “Are you mad at me?” Yes....

“I see that.” He nodded and gazed down the long garden. “This is all edible?” “You can ingest it all, yes.” He pushed his glasses up his nose and frowned at me. “What’s that mean?” I laughed and poked his hard chest. “It means, if you want to steal from my garden, you best know your plants. You might end up eating something you shouldn’t.” “Eisley.” His expression darkened. “Are you hoarding…”

“It’s fine. It’s a comfort thing. It keeps the dark thoughts away.” “The idea of poisoning someone keeps the dark thoughts away?” He followed me back inside. I put the tea kettle on the stove and turned the burner on. I turned back to him and grinned. “Exactly.”

“I think it could be fun. A double creature feature, popcorn, and watching it under the stars? Come on.” I pointed to the flyer taped to a store window. Eisley frowned. We just couldn’t find our footing. Last night, we fought, then she had her nightmares. She was still upset about my scars, and I was upset about her little poison garden she had in her backyard. We were one passive aggressive comment away from exploding.

“You know it’s all fake,” I teased. “That knife is far too small to do that amount of damage.” “How would you know?” She tossed a handful of popcorn at my face, and I opened my mouth to catch some. Oh, darling. We didn’t have enough time to dive into that.

Right as the little Glass child leapt out of the darkness, someone crept up behind us and pressed a knife to Eisley’s neck. Eisley screamed, and I shoved the unknown assailant back. Everyone turned to see Spencer falling on his ass, clutching the large knife, and howling with laughter. Without another thought, I lurched forward and raised my fist. He tried to get back up, but I shoved him and threw myself against him. Getting him onto his back, I raised my fist again. “You think that’s fucking funny?” I shouted and swung my fist at his nose.

“Kansas, stop!” Eisley’s panicked voice burst through the autopilot my brain was on, but not enough to get me to pull back my fists and stop hitting Spencer. He rolled me onto my back and got a few shots in, but I’d been working out and training for a year to fight and defend myself. This pretty boy had no chance against me.

“What the hell, dude!” Spencer threw up his hands. “Are you some sort of psycho?” “You had a fucking knife!” “What seems to be the problem here?” Two officers approached us. “He attacked me!” Spencer pointed to me.

“You a Foxworth?” the officer asked Spencer, who nodded eagerly. I snickered. I knew more than anyone in this god forsaken town how important the Foxworths were here. “He had a knife,” I explained to the officer lamely. I knew I was fucked. “I don’t see a knife anywhere.” The officer pretended to look around, but he wasn’t concerned. “Now, why don’t we scatter this little tussle before someone has to be cuffed and taken in?” He gave me a pointed look. “Someone?” I laughed, but the officer didn’t. To him, I was the criminal and not Spencer Foxworth.

“Is this the kind of man you want to be seen with?” Spencer turned his focus to...

“He’s not an animal,” she snapped, to my surprise. “You’re the one who put a knife to my girlfriend’s throat,” I added. “Will you both stop!” Eisley threw up her hands. “I’m leaving.” She stormed through the cars. “Eisley, wait!” I glared at her so-called friends and took off in the direction she’d gone, but she had disappeared. I searched around the area until the police pulled up to me. “Young man, I think it’s best you get in your car and head on out. You’re making peop...

“Fine, whatever.” Enraged, I got in my car and left. I gripped the wheel and drove slowly through the blocks, looking for Eisley. About a mile later, I saw her and slowed down. I rolled the window down and called to her. “Eisley, what are you doing?” “Go away!” She glared straight ahead and kept walking. “Eisley, come on, get in the car.” “No.” She took a deep breath and started to jog. I...

“I’m getting away from you!” Tears streamed down her face. “I don’t know why you even came here this weekend. To rub it in my face that you’re able to move on and live a normal life? Good for you, Kansas, but I can’t do that.” “Why not? Eisley, nothing is stopping you from being happy except yourself. You can’t keep living in the past.” “If we hadn’t run⁠—” “Then we would have been forced to do that disgusting shit for him. We knew the risks and so did Constantine. That’s why he stayed behind to give us a chance to escape. Eisley, he wanted you to live a normal life.” “With him.” She shook her head. While I had moved to the final stages and accepted what happened that night, Eisley was forever stuck in denial. “Constantine wanted me to live a normal life with him. That’s why I⁠—”

“Sssh. You don’t have to explain things. I know. I understand. I’m not upset about what happened at the ceremony. Eisley, this isn’t healthy. You have to allow yourself to be happy.” “I am.” She rubbed the tears off her cheeks. “No, you’re not. That’s why I came this specific weekend.” She looked up at me curiously. “What do you mean?” “Do you not remember the date?” She blinked and then her deep brown eyes grew wide. “Oh my god. How could I forget?”

“I should have remembered. Now I feel even worse.” She put her head in her hands. “His birthday. God, I’m so stupid.” “You’re not stupid. It’s easy to forget.” “How old would he be now?” “Twenty-two, I think.” I pretended to not remember for sure, but I knew I was right. “He was a few months older than us.”

“That’s right.” She nodded, and her eyes took on a distant look. “I remember. They served us cake.” Bitterness boiled in my belly. Birthdays were the only things celebrated in the Family. It was a disgusting show, and if we knew then what we knew now about why they did the parties, we wouldn’t have been so eager to participate. “I feel so shitty for forgetting.” Eisley sighed. “You shouldn’t. It’s called moving on.” “Sometimes I feel like I died just as much as he did that night.”

“Can we go to the memorial site?” she asked. “I know he’s not really in there, but⁠—” “It’s kind of dark. Can we go tomorrow? Why don’t we go back to your place tonight and make a cake or something for him.” “A cake?” I shrugged. “It’s better than mourning him. Why not celebrate?” “Okay, I kind of like that idea.” She reached for my hand and squeezed. “I have a killer stra...

My phone buzzed in my pocket, but I ignored it. I knew who was texting this late, but he’d have to wait so I could tell him every...

“First thing in the morning, we’ll go out, grab some flowers, and head over to the memorial site,” Kansas promised me as we walked hand in hand up my front porch steps and into the house. “I like that idea.”

I grinned. “My kitchen is my safe space. I can zone out and forget my problems while I’m here. I like to shut it all off and focus on the task at hand.” “I love that for you. I think it shows in your videos.” “Yeah?” I perked up. “You want to go live with me?” He blinked. “What, like, right now?” “Why not?” I shrugged. “Or are you camera shy?” I teased. “I mean, I’m not, but…” He squirmed. “Won’t your male viewership get jealous?” “Maybe, but that just means I’ll get a flood of messages, and messages cost them money.” I grinned wickedly. “You’re evil,” he laughed. “Each message to send and receive is a dollar. I rack up a pretty penny some nights.”

He shook his head. “I wish I was hot enough to do that. I could pay for school and not blink an eye.” “You’re definitely hot enough.” I raised an eyebrow as my eyes trailed down his body. “You just need some confidence.” I turned to my fridge for the dairy and other various items. “If you took off your shirt, flexed, and put a book in your hand, Booktok would go crazy.” “Booktok?” He laughed. “Yeah, those girlies love a hot guy who reads. Can you growl?” “Growl?” He plucked a strawberry from my bowl the moment I set it down. “I might just keep eating ramen for a while. Now, how can I help?”

“What kind of tea do you want?” Kansas opened my cabinet filled with various jars of dried tea. “I have a nice fall mix I made the other day. You want to try it?” I pointed to the jar I wanted him to bring down and he did as the whistle blew. While I chopped strawberries to put in the filling, Kansas filled two tea infusers with my mix and poured us cups of hot water. “Thanks!” I blew him a kiss, and he rolled his eyes. “You really gotta stop doing that.” “Doing what?”

He sighed and looked directly at me from across the island. “Teasing me. You’re so damn…” He sighed and slapped the counter. “I think I need some fresh air. I’ll be back.” He turned to leave the kitchen, and just then, a knock came from my front door.