“I’m a fucking wreck, Sam. The prick unrejected me, so that’s a thing, and I can honestly say I didn’t see that coming.” “Wait, can he do that?” “I don’t know, but that’s what he did. I know jack-all about mates, but I apparently have two now, so I should probably find a book or something.” “A book?” “Yeah, so I can learn how to get rid of them,” I mumbled. “Maybe all I need is a poisoned apple.”
