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Do I love her? God. What a pedestrian question, one that feels like it doesn’t encompass all the feelings I have for her. It doesn’t seem like enough. But I’ll keep telling her, keep showing her, until I figure out better words to describe the way I feel about her.
A boy might stand here waiting for her to say it back, but I don’t need that validation. Bailey might not know what love is, but I do. Love is telling me I’m acting like an asshole when no one else will. Love is taking me shopping to find shoes that don’t rub my feet raw. It’s waking up every goddamn night for weeks to swim in the river with me, so I don’t have a nightmare. Bailey doesn’t need flowery words. Bailey needs proof.
I stare at her for a few beats. What a woman. What an incredible fucking woman. She deserves the goddamn world. And I’m going to be the one to give it to her.
“You’re not used to anyone showing up for you, Bailey. This is what that looks like. I told you I love you. I’ve never loved a woman before. Wasn’t sure I ever would. But now I do. And you and me? We’re a team. You don’t quit on your teammates. You don’t leave a man behind. So now you’re stuck with me. I’m just being patient. Waiting for you to come back.”
The first, last, and only man to love me. And I’m okay with that.
“You fill me with purpose. Lifting you up gives me a reason. Seeing you smile makes me feel whole. And I’m never going to apologize for that. We’re symbiotic, you and me. Without you, this version of me doesn’t exist. Without the next version of you, the next version of me doesn’t exist either. We’re going to grow together.”
