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“It turns out I’m absolutely terrible at staying away from you. It’s a very serious problem.”
“He’s trying so hard to catch you, and every time he gets close you push him away.
It was impossible. I had to choose. Aspen or Maxon.
Easy choice.
How did this person—someone I’d imagined would be my polar opposite—always seem to find the things that would make me the happiest?
That hopeful feeling hit me again, the wonder that we might be something special.
Darling? The word, so tender and personal, enveloped me. In that moment, any desire I had to fight my feelings for Maxon disappeared. I wanted to be his dear, his darling. I wanted to be Maxon’s alone.
“It’s you,” I said. “I don’t want to leave you.”
Every once in a while he’d let out a long sigh, and in that sound alone I could hear how happy he was. That helped me not to feel so anxious.
That was so typical of him, always trying to be my hero.
“So he enjoys a girl who stands up to him,” Dad said once we all calmed down. “I like him more already.”
“It’s the most wonderful and terrible thing that can ever happen to you,” she said simply. “You know that you’ve found something amazing, and you want to hold on to it forever; and every second after you have it, you fear the moment you might lose it.”
Love is beautiful fear.
there’s only you. Maybe I’m not really looking, maybe they aren’t right for me. It doesn’t matter. I just know I want you. And that terrifies me. I’ve been waiting for you to take back the words, to beg to leave.”
“Darling, you’re perfect.”
For that moment, it felt like we were the only two people in the world.
“Soon, when it’s proper for me to end the Selection, when I propose to you, I want it to be as easy as breathing for you to say yes. I promise to do everything in my power between now and that moment to make it that way. Anything you need, anything you want, say the words. I will do everything I can for you.”
“All I want is your promise to stay with me, to be mine. Sometimes it feels like you can’t possibly be real. Promise me you’ll stay.”
In that touch I knew so many things. I knew that this was real, that it was happening, and that I could let myself believe it.
Because now I was his. I knew it. I’d never been so sure.
I couldn’t imagine anything strong enough to take that happiness away.
How did I, America Singer—a Five, a nobody—fall for Maxon Schreave—a One, the One?
The fear was unmistakable, but there was also this look on her face, as if she was trying to reassure him that he was worth all this.
“It’s just the way it is. The sky is blue, the sun is bright, and Aspen endlessly loves America.
The worst quote to come out of this whole series.
“I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m really sorry Maxon turned out to be such a bad guy.
AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH. Top tier comedy right here.
It was like they carried the sun inside their souls and let it shine out on everything around them.
IF YOU WANT THE CROWN, AMERICA, TAKE IT. TAKE IT. BECAUSE IT SHOULD BE YOURS.
I’ve always thought it should be you.”
Maxon is gone. This changes everything.
No.
“Sometimes I feel like we’re a knot, too tangled to be taken apart.”
“We’ll just have to stay tangled then.”
Or you could not.
Was I a Five or a Three? When this was over, would I be a Two or a One? Would I live out my days as an officer’s wife or a king’s?
And there it was, pushing up through all the worries: hope.
I was surprised by how much I ached to see him go.
But the important issue wasn’t how this all made me feel. The important issue was what I was going to do with it.
“I was afraid that if he didn’t have me, he’d want you.”
“You were my pick. My only pick.
I couldn’t say the words aloud. If I did, how would I be able to leave?
“Please don’t cry, darling. I’d spare you tears for the rest of your life if I could.”
What I would give, what I would give to just hear someone say these words to me just once.
It wasn’t like I made his world better. It was like I was his world. It wasn’t some explosion; it wasn’t fireworks. It was a fire, burning slowly from the inside out.
“You’ve changed me forever. And I’ll never forget you.”
“Don’t tug your ear with anyone else. That’s mine.”
He would think about me, though, from time to time, and that comforted me. No matter what, this was real.
If I had them, there was no way I could lose.
