It Will All Work Out: The Freedom of Letting Go

by Kevin Hart

these monsters cannot eat when you’re living right. Why? Because they have no food. Their food is your attention. Their food is your trust. Their food is your unthinking obedience.

Once you see how these beasts work—and in just a moment, I’m going to introduce the most important of these monsters so you can recognize them—you’ve got a choice. To either stay asleep and let these creatures run the show. Or wake up, learn how to beat them, and take your power back.

But no matter what form your Control Monster ends up taking, they all serve the exact same purpose: to manage anxiety, and make sure you’re safe and successful.

Control is having power over a situation, yourself, or others, and being able to influence what goes down.

And if the Control Monster sees failure as a potential outcome at the end of the road, it can try to avoid that outcome by jumping into action nonstop. It has you fighting your way through and doing everything yourself, because it doesn’t believe other people can do a good job or look after your best interests.

Any form of control is really just protection. And you get protective because you’re afraid. And you’re afraid because you don’t trust. Let me say it again: Any form of control, at the end of the day, is really just protection. And you get protective because you’re afraid of something bad happening. And the reason you’re afraid of something bad happening again is because you don’t trust yourself or others to handle a situation.

It’s only when we trust each other, rely on each other, and give each other our best instead of saving it for ourselves that we can experience the full banquet of life. We might even experience heaven on earth.

Stress is a limiter. The less we feel, the more we can take on.