Flame and Sparrow (Flame and Sparrow Duology Book 1)

by S.M. Gaither

fighting the urge to scratch at the old burn marks on my cheek.

I understand this is apart of the FMCs mannerisms, but it really does not need to be mentioned so damn often. This is like 4th time in three chapters.

I didn’t bother trying to collect the scattered papers; I would have to redo them all at this point; my mind was finicky that way, sometimes—if one drawing in a set was lost or ruined, I had to start over from the beginning, or else nothing about it would feel right.

I am absolutely loving the OCD representation here. AND IT’S DEPICTED SO WELL. It feels completely ingratiated to me, not at all forced or like the author is just doing it to give the character some depth.

“You know of the Moraki, Creators of all things, of course. Belegor, who formed the physical worlds. Solatis, who brought forth life, and Malaphar, who brought forth knowledge.” She glanced impatiently over her shoulder at me, and I nodded. “And the beings you call elves were the first ones Solatis created in her likeness,” she continued. “But she made them too powerful. When the God of the Shade—Malaphar—gave them the entirety of his knowledge as well, the combination of it all proved too much for them to remain satisfied with their place in the world. They rebelled against the upper-gods and had to be stripped of their magic and power to prevent a total war that likely would have led to complete ruin for everyone involved.” “And they were relegated to Avalinth, stripped of their immortality, and left with nothing but curses and a few traces of divine power, correct?” Rieta nodded. “And soon after, Solatis tried again, creating a new being. Humans. These were the complete opposite of the elves—weak, frail things this time. Too weak, it turned out, because though they were great in number, their gifted realm of Avalinth was not flourishing under their rule. So the Moraki made the decision to choose a few exemplary humans and elevate them to divine status in order to help things along.” “So came the Marr,” I muttered. “Yes,” said Rieta. “Beings nearly as powerful as those elves once were, but far fewer in number. They are stewards of the mortal realm and others. Able to wal...

The God of Winter took my hand and gave it a businesslike shake. “You didn’t die an unspeakably horrifying death,” he said. “Well done, You. I’m so proud.”

“This is the part where you tell me to go fuck myself, isn’t it?” I glared at him. He was going to insist on arguing and complicating things between us even further, wasn’t he? “Go on, then.” He arched a brow. “Don’t get shy on me now.” “I’m not shy.” “Your cheeks are flushed in a way that suggests otherwise.” “Nothing about you is responsible for any color in my cheeks, I assure you,” I hissed. “And there’s nothing you could do or say that would cause such a thing.” “Really?” His brows lifted higher, as though I’d just issued a challenge. “Nothing at all?” “I am not some hapless, giggling virgin who’s going to throw myself at your feet every time you flash a crooked smile my way.” “That’s a shame,” he said, “because I love it when hapless, giggling virgins throw themselves at my feet.”

“I’m not usually a fan of the solo routine, as it were.” He smiled brighter, clearly enjoying himself now. “You don’t happen to know where I could find some giggling virgins, do you?” “I can’t help you there.” I kept my voice perfectly even, determined not to seem flustered, as I added, “But I’m in a generous mood, so please feel free to think of me while you take care of yourself. Just know that it’s as close as you’ll ever get to the real thing. So I hope you enjoy it.” He stroked the hard line of his jaw as if considering my offer. And I swear the bastard stopped just short of winking at me as he turned away, chuckling, and said, “I was already planning on thinking of you.” It felt as if my cheeks were close to igniting as I watched him leave.

While I picked the bread apart, he spooned something that looked like honey into his cup—an alarmingly large amount of honey—and stirred it without taking his eyes off me. “Did you even sleep last night?” “Not as much as I should have,” I muttered. He stirred more slowly. Each circle of the spoon felt deliberate, loaded with unspoken commentary. “I noticed you and Dravyn were all alone when I left you.” “And?” He took the spoon out and ting, ting, tinged it against the rim. “The two of you seem to be growing close.”

I think I love Valas

“People often overlook my power in favor of the brighter, bolder abilities of the rest of my court,” she said. “But the ability to change things is a magic more potent than any other, I believe.”

“And now I feel like you and that dress should get out of my sight,” he said, “before we do something we’ll both end up regretting.” A traitorous thought flashed through my mind before I could guard against it— I want to do regrettable things with him.

“Well, I suppose it’s lucky I’ve never based my worth on how useful I could be to a man. Or to a god, for that matter.” He ran a hand through his hair, eyes lifting toward the ceiling as they often did when he was becoming exasperated with me. But I thought I saw a corner of his mouth inch up as he said, “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I might actually miss that smart mouth of yours while you’re gone.” Heat climbed into my cheeks. That—combined with the hope blooming defiantly in my heart—made me more bold than usual. Or more foolish. Or both. “Well, I would tell you to feel free to think of this mouth while I’m gone,” I said, “but I’m sure you were already planning to think about it.” His gaze finally fixed on me, burning with possibility and promise as he said, “Among other things.”

“I didn’t want your help!” I practically roared. “I don’t want anything from you and your stupid court! I wish you’d left me alone—I wish you’d left me alone on the very first day we met, when I was burning on that platform!”

Fuck :( I’ve really liked Karys up until this point. I haven’t expected her to drop her vengeance quite so soon, but I was very much hoping she wouldn’t digress like she currently is. I’ve liked her because of how smart she’s been so far, albeit with a curiosity that leans towards the dangerous side, but this doesn’t feel smart to me. She came here without all of the answers, clearly, and still has received hardly any but has spent enough time with the Shade court to realize that not everything is what she thought it was concerning the gods and their behaviors. However, her “family” just essentially cast her out for disagreeing with their endless warmongering and for daring to want to pause and think things through more thoroughly. So it’s disappointing that she’s lashing out towards to people who have literally no history with her or general obligation to help her (especially after she entered this entire ordeal under false pretenses to overthrow them) and yet are the only one’s that seem genuinely concerned for her well being and interested in her companionship for who she ACTUALLY is.

Back and forth the images went, healing and heat all twisting more tightly together with every flutter of my eyelids until I could no longer tell what was saving me and what was destroying me.

Something about the creature’s accepting nudges gave me the courage to keep speaking. “My sister… she died a little over five years ago. I’m the one who found her blood-covered room. And the dead veilhound at our house weeks before—a harbinger of her death, I think. Even before that, I was always on guard. We were once one of the most powerful elven houses in Avalinth, and both my father and sister were leaders in the movement to try and restore that power. So we had no shortage of enemies.”

Phew. I already like Karys again. Yes girl, spill your secrets to your fire god. Let’s get the hidden agendas trope out of the way finally.

Dravyn was quiet for another long moment, then asked, “You wanted to be with them?” “Of course.” “But did you want to be like them?” The question felt like another chisel carving away at the protective walls I’d erected around my heart. It took everything in me not to recoil, to answer it honestly. “I’m not sure. I never really felt like Savna. Though when she died, I….” I trailed off, absently running my hands along the selakir’s smooth coat. “Put down your daggers, you said. But honestly, sometimes I’m not sure if the blades I’m carrying are hers or mine. And if they’re hers, I feel like I…” Like I can’t put them down.

For a brief, weak moment, I considered telling him everything. My plans, my fury, my fears. All about the knife and the poison and the wars I was carrying. I wanted to come clean, to lay out everything before him even though I still didn’t fully understand why.

You almost did it :/ so damn close

“I knew you’d come to me yourself. Eventually.” “Such arrogance.” “I thought you’d be used to it by now.” “Just waiting for me…” I gave another slight smile. “Like a lazy beast hoping his prey stumbles in to be killed.” Another pinch of my nipple sent a shock of pleasure deep into my belly. “Or am I just a patient beast?” he suggested. “A clever one?” “You’re very good at complimenting yourself.” “One of my more underrated skills.” “Do I want to know what your higher-rated ones are?” “Would you like me to show you?”

I’d more or less come to the conclusion that anger was a strange well to draw from; the more you drank of it, the thirstier you became.

As I stared at him, a thought struck me—that what I’d told him was true. I really had been surrounded by fighting my entire life. But I’d rarely experienced someone fighting for me the way he kept doing.

“Stay the night with me?” was all he asked. “Just in case we have more uninvited company.” Just in case I need to protect you. I nodded, another clench of desire tightening my stomach as his fingers swept from my cheek down to the hollow of my throat. “Though I still don’t need you to burn the world down for me,” I said, “just so we’re clear. The divine world or otherwise. Nothing has changed regarding that.” He smiled, his other hand finding its way to my lower back, pulling me more fully into his lap. “You can do it yourself, as I recall.” “Yes.” “So perhaps I’ll just stand among the ashes with you,” he said, “and admire your work.” “I could allow that.”

Everything I had ever tried to let go of had claw marks on it,

But I was beginning to think that a mind that was unwilling to change was not necessarily a strength.

Still breathing hard, Valas turned a wild gaze on me. “Sparrow, my love, ever-favorite object of my heart,” he said, forcing a smile that came across a bit feral, “what the ever-loving fuck are you doing back here?”

Then he said, “There isn’t an easy, direct translation into any other language…because it’s more like an idea. A feeling. We have a story in my old kingdom, that when the one you’re meant to be with enters the world, they steal a part of your soul with their first breath. “And you exist, missing that part, until they find you and breathe it back into you. Miran-achth refers to the breath—the part that is missing. You can survive without it. Plenty do. But to have the missing piece is to breathe easier, more deeply. The first time the term left my lips, I wasn’t thinking of that story, really; I was only thinking of how relieved I was to have you back with me. How you had survived the trial, so I could inhale again.”

I let him chatter on about the different facets of his power he planned to show me soon. But my uneasy feeling persisted, tightening the knots in my stomach and deepening my concerned frown until even he stopped trying to make light of the situation.

I'd go check on the Tower of Ascension considering how much time you spent theorizing with Cillian that an attack there would be incredibly destabilizing and you’re too smart to not remember the significance of that conversation. They were YOUR plans initially.

Another group of our enemies must have slipped in while we were distracted. One with stronger weapons aiming for the spot where they could do the most long-term damage to this realm—the spot where gods were made and their magic was shaped. “Their real target was the Tower of Ascension,” I whispered.

Oh? No shit. Karys literally gave them this plan so I find it unbelievably disappointing that a character as detail-oriented and intelligent as she is wouldn’t have come this conclusion earlier.