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Up until the twentieth century, traditional cultures (and this is still true of most cultures in the world) always believed that too high a view of yourself was the root cause of all the evil in the world.
She quotes three current studies into the subject of self-esteem, all of which reach this conclusion and she states that ‘people with high self-esteem pose a greater threat to those around them than people with low self-esteem and feeling bad about yourself is not the source of our country’s biggest, most expensive social problems.’
It is swollen, inflamed and extended past its proper size. And that, says Paul, is the condition of the natural human ego.
I think the image suggests four things about the natural condition of the human ego: that it is empty, painful, busy and fragile.
Spiritual pride is the illusion that we are competent to run our own lives, achieve our own sense of self-worth and find a purpose big enough to give us meaning in life without God.
People sometimes say their feelings are hurt. But our feelings can’t be hurt! It is the ego that hurts – my sense of self, my identity. Our feelings are fine! It is my ego that hurts.
it is incredibly busy doing two things in particular – comparing and boasting.
‘Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next person. We say that people are proud of being rich, or clever, or good-looking, but they are not. They are proud of being richer, or cleverer, or better-looking than others. If everyone else became equally rich, or clever, or good-looking there would be nothing to be proud about.’
Pride destroys the ability to have any real pleasure from her.
So, at school, I did all kinds of things that I had absolutely no interest in doing for themselves. I was simply putting together a résumé. That is what our egos are doing all the time. Doing jobs we have no pleasure in,
‘My drive in life comes from a fear of being mediocre. That is always pushing me. I push past one spell of it and discover myself as a special human being but then I feel I am still mediocre and uninteresting unless I do something else. Because even though I have become somebody, I still have to prove that I am somebody. My struggle has never ended and I guess it never will.’
In fact, his identity owes nothing to what people say.
but how do we reach the point where we are not controlled by what people think about us?
If someone has a problem with low self-esteem we, in our modern world, seem to have only one way of dealing with it. That is remedying it with high self-esteem. We tell someone that they need to see that they are a great person, they need to see how wonderful they are.
If someone has a problem with low self-esteem we, in our modern world, seem to have only one way of dealing with it. That is remedying it with high self-esteem. We tell someone that they need to see that they are a great person, they need to see how wonderful they are.
Are low standards a solution? Not at all. That makes me feel terrible because I realize I am the type of person who has low standards.
And yet, in 1 Timothy, he says ‘Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief’ (1 Tim. 1:15 NKJV). Not I was chief, but I am chief. Or ‘I am the worst’. This is off our maps. We are not used to someone who has incredible confidence volunteering the opinion that they are one of the worst people.
he is saying that he knows about his sins but he does not connect them to himself and his identity. His sins and his identity are not connected.
We set our standards and then we condemn ourselves. The ego will never be satisfied that way. Never!
He has reached the place where he is not thinking about himself anymore. When he does something wrong or something good, he does not connect it to himself any more.
Because the essence of gospel-humility is not thinking more of myself or thinking less of myself, it is thinking of myself less.
He says ‘I don’t care about your opinion but, I don’t care that much about my opinion’ – and that is the secret.
Someone who does not lust for recognition – nor, on the other hand, is frightened to death of it?
Wouldn’t you like to be the type of person who, in their imaginary life, does not sit around fantasizing about hitting self-esteem home-runs, daydreaming about successes that gives them the edge over others?
Wouldn’t you like to be the skater who wins the silver, and yet is thrilled about those three triple jumps that the gold medal winner did? To love it the way you love a sunrise? Just to love the fact that it was done? For it not to matter whether it was their success or your success. Not to care if they did it or you did it. You are as happy that they did it as if you had done it yourself – because you are just so happy to see it.
Then he says ‘My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent’. The word translated ‘innocent’ comes from the word ‘justify’. The word for ‘justify’ is the same one he uses throughout Romans and Galatians. Here Paul is saying that even if his conscience is clear, that does not justify him.
the problem with self-esteem – whether it is high or low – is that, every single day, we are in the courtroom. Every single day, we are on trial. That is the way that everyone’s identity works.
Do you realize that it is only in the gospel of Jesus Christ that you get the verdict before the performance?
Do you realize that it is only in the gospel of Jesus Christ that you get the verdict before the performance?
But Paul is saying that in Christianity, the verdict leads to performance. It is not the performance that leads to the verdict.
God can say to us just as He once said to Christ, ‘You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.’
Because He loves me and He accepts me, I do not have to do things just to build up my résumé. I do not have to do things to make me look good. I can do things for the joy of doing them.
I can help people to help people – not so I can feel better about myself, not so I can fill up the emptiness.
The performance never gets the ultimate verdict.
Self-forgetfulness takes you out of the courtroom. The trial is over. The verdict is in.
All I can tell you is that we have to re-live the gospel every time we pray. We have to re-live it every time we go to church. We have to re-live the gospel on the spot and ask ourselves what we are doing in the courtroom. We should not be there. The court is adjourned.
