Fear: Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm

by Thich Nhat Hanh

The practice of living fully in the present moment—what we call mindfulness—can give us the courage to face our fears and no longer be pushed and pulled around by them. To be mindful means to look deeply, to touch our true nature of interbeing and recognize that nothing is ever lost.

We all experience fear, but if we can look deeply into our fear, we will be able to free ourselves from its grip and touch joy. Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.

The first part of looking at our fear is just inviting it into our awareness without judgment. We just acknowledge gently that it is there. This brings a lot of relief already. Then, once our fear has calmed down, we can embrace it tenderly and look deeply into its roots, its sources. Understanding the origins of our anxieties and fears will help us let go of them. Is our fear coming from something that is happening right now, or is it an old fear, a fear from when we were small, that we’ve kept inside? When we practice inviting all our fears up, we become aware that we are still alive, that we still have many things to treasure and enjoy. If we are not busy pushing down and managing our fear, we can enjoy the sunshine, the fog, the air, and the water.

When you turn on the television, it may not be because there’s a fascinating program you want to see; it’s because you’re afraid of being alone with yourself. If you’re afraid of what other people might think of you, it comes from that same place. You’re afraid that if others think negatively about you, they won’t accept you and you’ll be left all alone, in danger. So if you need others to always think well of you, that is a continuation of that same original fear. If you regularly go shopping to buy yourself new clothes, it’s because of that same desire; you want to be accepted by others.

One of the first things we can do to soothe our fear is to talk to it. You can sit down with that fearful child inside and be gentle with him or her. You might say something like this: “Dear little child, I am your adult self. I would like to tell you that we are no longer a baby, helpless and vulnerable. We have strong hands and strong feet; we can very well defend ourselves. So there is no reason why we have to continue to be fearful anymore.”

Mindfulness reminds us that it is possible to be in the here and now. It reminds us that the present moment is always available to us; we don’t have to live events that happened long ago.

You may want to say to the little one inside you, the past is not our home; our home is here, where we can really live our life. We can get all the nourishment and healing we need here in the present moment.

We likewise can prepare for the future without getting consumed by our plans. Often we either don’t plan at all, or we get caught up in obsessive planning because we fear the future and its uncertainty. The present moment is where we need to operate. When you are truly anchored in the present moment, you can plan for the future in a much better way. Living mindfully in the present does not preclude making plans. It only means that you know there’s no use losing yourself in worries and fear concerning the future.

When we say that body and mind are connected, this does not mean just your own individual body and mind. In you are all your blood ancestors and also your spiritual ancestors. You can touch the presence of your father and mother in each cell of your body. They are truly present in you, along with your grandparents and great-grandparents. Doing this, you know you are their continuation. You may have thought that your ancestors no longer existed, but even scientists say your ancestors are present in you, in the genetic heritage that is in every cell of your body. The same is true for your descendants. You will be present in every cell of their bodies. And you are present in the consciousness of everyone you have touched.

We know that the mementos and belongings we covet must all be abandoned one day. That’s why those in monastic life practice not to collect things. The Buddha said monastics should have only three robes, a begging bowl, a water filter, and a sitting mat, and even these few things they also should be prepared to release. The Buddha often said that we should not be attached to even the foot of that tree where we like to sit and sleep. We should be able to sit and sleep at the foot of any tree. Our happiness should not depend on having that particular spot. We must be ready to let go.

All the thoughts you have thought, all the words you have spoken, all the actions you have done with your body—these are your karma that follows and continues you. Everything else you leave behind. Here we are speaking of inheriting not our parents’ savings, but the fruits of our own actions. What we have thought, said, and done is called karma, which in Sanskrit means action. What we do, say, and think continues on after the act is done, and its fruits follow us.

Invite your fear into consciousness, and smile through it; every time you smile through your fear, it will lose some of its strength. If you try to run away from your pain, there is no way out. Only by looking deeply into the nature of your fear can you find the way out.

Using diversions like television, computer games, alcohol, and drugs, we try to ignore the realities of aging, illness, death, and the impermanence of the things we cherish. If we allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by our fears, we will suffer, and the seed of fear in us will grow stronger. But when we are mindful, we use the energy of mindfulness to embrace our fear. Every time fear is embraced by mindfulness, the energy of fear decreases before going back down to the depths of our consciousness as a seed.

Just because fear goes away for a little while doesn’t mean we have dissolved it completely. If we have a peaceful moment, a moment of meditation, we can call it up again. “My dear fear, come up here so I can embrace you for a while. It is my nature to die; I cannot escape death.” We can stay with our fear for five, ten, twenty, or thirty minutes, depending on our needs, and use the energy of mindfulness to embrace our fear. Being embraced like that every day, our fear will lose its strength.

When we are not fully present, we are not really living. We’re not really there, either for our loved ones or for ourselves.

We cannot enjoy life if we spend our time and energy worrying about what happened yesterday and what will happen tomorrow. If we’re afraid all the time, we miss out on the wonderful fact that we’re alive and can be happy right now.

We forget that life is available only in the present moment. The Buddha said, “It is possible to live happily in the present moment. It is the only moment we have.”

The Bible tells the story of a farmer who discovered a treasure buried on his land. When he went back home, he gave up all the rest of his land and everything else he owned. He kept only that one small piece of land that contained the treasure. That treasure is the kingdom of God. We know that we should look for the kingdom of God in the present moment, because the present moment is the only moment that is. The past is gone, and the future is not yet here.