And what I know for a fact is that Vanilla Ice’s “Ice Ice Baby” is the platonic ideal of your first rap song, or at least the first rap song you ever loved.7 It’s a better song the less hip-hop you’re familiar with, the less context you have in general, the younger and more naïve you are. It’s the best rap song imaginable if you are but an adorable newborn foal, your shaky legs tottering adorably on the Disneyfied ice of late childhood or early pre-adolescence. It’s better if you don’t know shit about shit.
