Kasher in the Rye: The True Tale of a White Boy from Oakland Who Became a Drug Addict, Criminal, Mental Patient, and Then Turned 16

by Moshe Kasher

I threw some pants on and headed out the door with my mother, as always, standing in the doorway trying to forbid me to leave. “Where are you going?” she growled. “Out.” I was always going out. She was always in my way. I never considered back then what happened those moments when I pushed her to one side and slid out the door. Never considered that she sighed, wondering if I’d just stolen her money. Never considered that she cried, wondering if she’d see me again. Never even thought. All I knew was that she was in my way and that my friend needed me. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I looked at my mom and the shock of crow’s-feet cracking her face and I wondered if I’d caused them. At the time, though, all I knew was that she was in my way. “Get out of the fucking way,” I’d said to her, unconcerned if she knew what I was saying or not. I was becoming a monster and I didn’t even know it.