The Pucking Wrong Guy (Pucking Wrong, #2)

by C.R. Jane

I liked to call him, the poster child for "bad hair dye,” looking like a mole on someone’s left ass cheek. Not my left ass cheek, obviously. There was only perfection there.

Omg lol

Ah, Walker, the team's resident heartthrob—before my arrival, of course—and

“What’s your name, sunshine?” I asked, instead of grabbing her and dragging her away. I deserved a mother fucking medal for that, by the way.

"Is there a special where I get to have lunch with you?" I quipped. Because I really was that much of a fucking idiot, apparently.

I couldn’t wait to not be a stranger to her anymore. I wanted to be her best friend, her everything. It was the only ending I could accept.

This time, a real smile popped across her face. And she snorted! I gave myself another inward fist pump…because I believed in celebrating victories.

“Maximus 5000” aka “Little Ari”, wasn’t interested in anyone else now that she’d been found.

Oh my gosh Ari. 😂💀

I turned on some Tay-Tay to try to get her talking, and sure enough, after “High Infidelity” started playing—a banger of a track, by the way—she turned her head back toward me.

Good job, Ari, I told myself. Because it was important to give yourself mental high fives when you were fucking amazing.

I wanted to say I could be her thirst trap, but again, I restrained myself. I’d have to remind Lincoln how much of a saint I was. AGAIN.

Daddy Linc will be so proud. 🤭

And here was the thing. It was not my finest moment…because I almost came in my pants watching her savor that first bite. Like, what the fuck. It wasn’t even fair that I couldn’t stick my dick in her mouth after that.

Strawberry frosting on my dick. A dickcake.

“You know who I fucking am. And don’t you fucking say his name again, or I’m going to choke you with my mother fucking cock,” Ari Lancaster growled.

Oh. 😳👀

He reached between us and pulled his cock free from his tight pants, and I was deceased. Because Ari Lancaster's cock was completely pierced from root to tip. A Jacob's ladder extending from the bottom of his gigantic dick, all the way to the top.

“I was deceased”. Girl. I would have been too. 🫠

He was about to split me in half, because there was no way that that dick was fitting all the way inside me.

“Yes, that’s it. Look at you, coming on my big cock. What a fucking good girl.” My insides clenched, another tiny orgasm fluttering through me at his words. He grinned wickedly. “Looks like someone likes to be praised. Which is my lucky day. Because I’m going to spend every day in this sweet pussy, telling you how perfect you are.”

It was Lincoln and tequila’s fault that I had this piercing to begin with. We’d signed our rookie contracts and got absolutely shit-faced. Before I knew it, I was getting my cock pierced and we were getting matching butterfly tattoos.

And I was still hard. Can you sprain your dick? Because that was going to happen now that it had found nirvana. The “Maximus 5000” would need to be fed. Daily. Hourly actually.

I just can’t with him 😂😂

I had the hardest erection of my entire life and she kept pushing against it. And I was eating tacos. Fuckkk.

There was nothing worse than a meat fart. Don’t think about meat farts when you’re about to seduce your woman!, I screamed at myself.

My eyes widened, because golly gee willikers, I’d died and gone to heaven. Blake had a dirty mouth.

"I've got a guy who can make Clark's flight plans go haywire, putting him on the no-fly list for at least a while." “Lincoln, honey bear, I could kiss you!” I said excitedly. "I do what I can," Lincoln said, and I could practically see the sly grin on his face.

I could have burned down the whole building or had it condemned, but there was a cute gray haired lady who lived across from Blake. And I just couldn’t do that to her. I was a simp for grandmas.

I moaned and moved, realizing how achy I felt. Which was expected when you let a nine inch rod up your ass.

Daaayuum.