That's Not My Name

by Megan Lally

“My teenage daughter is missing. I can’t reach her on the phone; I’ve been driving around for hours trying to find her. I think I have to file a missing person’s report.”

“She’s seventeen, with short brown hair, freckles, and green eyes. Around five foot five.”

Life really goes to shit when everyone thinks you killed your girlfriend.

Name: Lola Elizabeth Scott Age: 17 Hair color: Dark brown Eye color: Green Last seen: 10:55pm on September 29th at the Willamette River boat launch in Washington City

Lola’s been gone for five weeks, almost to the day,

My face burns with shame. This man, who knew me almost as well as my own parents, and still turned on me like everyone else.

“Lola was my best friend, and I’ll be damned if I let you get away with this.” “Is.” “What?” “Is. She is your best friend. Present fucking tense,” I yell, stepping toward her.

“You know what’s funny? If the tables were turned, there isn’t a person on this Earth who could convince me you were capable of hurting anyone. I’d defend you until the end, Autumn. When she comes home, I don’t want to hear how sorry you are for stabbing me in the back. I’m fucking done with you.”

It’s a jean jacket, with rose gold buttons and pastel, floral sleeves. Periwinkle, orchid, and lilac on white fabric, with vintage leaves.

“They were all in your car, so I’ll have to find something for you to wear.”

Where is this "car" he keeps mentioning?!?

Car accidents suck.

We don't even know it was a car accident forsure..

“Where is she? My mom?” Wayne frowns and his gaze drops to his lap. “She’s been gone for a while now. It’s just the two of us. Both of our parents died before you were born, so we’re a smaller family. But we manage.”

“Car crash. When you were nine. It’s why last night had me so rattled. You scared the hell out of me. I thought I lost you too.”

“I wonder how long we have,” Wayne says. I squint at him. “What?” “Before your memory comes back.”

The Washington City pelicans. It’s a stupid mascot. Lola always hated that creepy bird. Hates. She hates it.

Why would the sheriff do this? Why now? I don’t understand. It’s been five weeks of questions and lawyers, but nobody’s searched my car before. Or my house. Which means they probably had no cause to get a warrant—so what changed? What do they have now that they didn’t have five weeks ago?

Staring at me with those beautiful, trusting, green eyes. The freckles across her nose peeking out from beneath her makeup.

She tried to make a deal: if she followed all their rules and got her grades back up, would they be willing to match what she’s saved so she could get a car by the end of the semester? But they said no. Repeatedly. They said it was important for her to make her own way in the world or some shit,

You say she simply got out of the car, but why would she want to walk all the way home from here? It’s at least three miles back to her house. Why would you let the girl you love walk home in the middle of the night by herself?”

It’s way too small. Almost comically small. How could he look at this and think it would fit me? I check the tag on the leggings but they’re smaller than the shirts. These look like they’d fit a middle schooler.

He nods and backs the van toward the road. “Yeah. Those new cabinets are costing me a fortune.” Cabinets? I blink at him, waiting for him to correct himself, but he doesn’t. “I thought you said the floors were being replaced.”

Counter lady

Eloise

You don’t know the rules.”

“It must have been the strawberries in the smoothie,” he blurts, leaning against the inside of the door. “Not the eggs. It’s the only thing you ate both times.” I think of the sliced strawberries sitting on the table at breakfast. It must have been the strawberries? Was he guessing the first time? How can my own father not know what I’m allergic to?

catch a woman staring at me from the sidewalk. I don’t know her—at least, I don’t think I do—but she gapes at me with wide, dark eyes. She’s short and slim. Maybe forty? With clearly home-done highlights in her dirty-blonde hair.

The van pulls away and she takes out her phone, almost frantic, and holds it to her ear.

Worst of all: Would she still be here now if I didn’t do what I did?

We miss Lola too… My parents don’t deserve a son as careless as me. If they knew what I did, they’d never forgive me.

“This is the worst time to not answer your phone… You won’t believe what he did. I can’t…I can’t even… He’s fucking evil. He’s the worst person. I can’t believe I spent so much time with him. He never really loved me. I don’t think he’s capable of love. He’s a fucking monster. I can’t believe he…”

“I broke up with her.”

I got so mad, I told her I couldn’t be a Band-Aid for her family drama…and I said she was draining the life out of me. That I was done.”

Then she accused me of looking for any excuse to end things and said I probably had some other girl lined up already and stormed off.”

It said she was by that convenience store up the road from the river for a long, long time, and then it disappeared.

Just…remember, you’re made of hopes and dreams, hijito. We wished for you for so long. I’m here. Whatever you need.”

“I’m a Virgo. I always come prepared.”

How does a father not remember what could kill his own daughter?

“Who is that?” “I don’t know. A neighbor, maybe? Seems friendly.” Then why do I have to go inside? To keep him from seeing my collarbone? Oh, the horror. Also, the old guy may be a neighbor? If we come up here all the time, wouldn’t Wayne know who lives nearby and who doesn’t?

“You know, something about you looks so familiar. I can’t put my finger on it.”

Old Man Ben.

I hear a thump against the side of the house. I pause to listen and hear it again a few seconds later.

Did he kill old man Ben..??

it’s a plaque with four silver hooks and “Family Forever” in white cursive across the top. I blink and a woman appears between me and the door. Her back is to me, reaching out to hang her keys on the hook. She’s in scrubs, I think. They’re teal and shapeless. Her dark hair hangs down her back and she throws it up in a bun and drops her purse on the red couch beside the door.

I start to turn away, but my gaze lands on his bare forearm and I frown. “Where did your jacket go?” He looks down at his T-shirt. “Oh. Must have left it in the car. I’ll get it later.”

I could have sworn he was wearing it when he got out of the van.

Ever After plays on the screen. A woman with long dark hair sits beside me, shaking a familiar fist at the prince as he turns his back on the girl he loves. The woman with the dark hair yells, “I hate this part!”

Custom floral sleeves that Autumn meticulously hand stitched with rose gold thread as part of her final project for fashion design last year. She made it for Lola. Even sewed her initials into the tag. Lola wore it everywhere, including the night she disappeared.

Lola was alive yesterday. She was standing outside a diner with some stranger, and I have the proof right here. Meredith Hoyt leaves her contact information,

I really do. If you hear anything, or you happen to see him, please call the number on that flier immediately. His wife is understandably upset, and we’re really hoping for a happy ending on this one.”

We haven’t had a chance to unpack, much less meet any of the neighbors.”

Tell Mary I said hello, would you? I’ll come by soon to check on her again.

Again? Youh didn't lay eyes on her or speak to her..

Wayne’s hesitation is so short that I almost miss it. But it’s there. Then he smiles and shakes the man’s hand.