Narcissistic people cannot manage their emotions. They don’t know how to express them because that would be too shameful and vulnerable, and so they cannot regulate them. The narcissistic person isn’t saying, “Hey, I am going to cover my insecurity with some grandstanding,” nor are they rubbing their hands together wondering, “How can I hurt you?” Their lashing out is unprocessed stuff, which is why even a mild critique or crisis can set off shame about their vulnerability or imperfection being on full display. These ego injuries then set off their rage and blame shifting, which allow them to
...more