Redeeming 6 (Boys of Tommen, #4)

by Chloe Walsh

“Mol…” With a great deal of effort, he shifted onto his side to face me and blinked an eye open. “Loy.” I smiled sadly. “Hey, stud.” “I’m…sorry.” His words were slurred, his eyes bloodshot, his pupils dilated. “So…sorry.”

Falling in love had exposed the biggest weakness in me because my heart refused to allow me to walk away from him, no matter how hopeless it seemed.

My baby would come first.

“You can’t even take care of yourself!” She pulled her hood back up when the wind knocked it down. “You’re sick, Joe. You’re so sick and you can’t even see it.”

“What about me?” she sobbed. “What about our baby? Do you care about us?” “You’re all I care about,” I snapped, pushing my hair back. “Fuck, you’re all I’ve ever cared about, Molloy. You know that.” “Then fight, Joey Lynch,” she begged, fisting her hand in the front of my hoodie. “Fight this.”

“Look at my face, Joe,” she told me, and I did. Fuck, I did. “This is what hurting the person who loves you most in the world looks like.” She sniffled, tears dripping down her face, mirroring mine. “Remember this moment,” she added quietly. “Remember what I looked like the day you broke my heart.”

I knew my actions were hurting her in a way that could send her away permanently, but I couldn’t stop myself anymore. I couldn’t pull myself back out of the hole I’d fallen into. Worse, a huge part of me didn’t want to.

The father of my unborn child was a heroin addict. That was a painful admission. It hurt so bad I could hardly breathe. For years, I had hung on every word that came from his mouth, too in love to see the warning signs and red flags dancing in front of my eyes. Unknowingly wearing my trust around my neck like a noose until it strangled me. Even now, as I watched him crawl through my bedroom window and stumble toward my bed in the darkness, I couldn’t find it in my heart to send him away. Because I was in love with him. The boy he used to be. The man he had become. All of his versions. I loved them all.

And there he was. My Joey. He was still in there. His heart was still beating inside that shell.

“Why tell me that?” I asked, thoroughly fucking rattled by her words. She looked me dead in the eyes when she said, “So you can stop disappointing me.”

“Where is he now?” “At work, supposedly.” “You don’t believe him?” “I don’t believe anything he says anymore, Case.” I can’t afford to. That was the sad truth.

I mean, the shit with his father is enough to give me PTSD, let alone Joey.

He looked haunted.

Anxiety and panic gnawed at my gut. “You believe me, don’t ya?” Molloy was quiet for a long time before she glanced sideways at me and said, “I believe in you.”

“O-ee,” Sean squealed in delight when he rounded the corner of the house and noticed me. “O-ee,” he cried out, arms outstretched, as he ran straight for me. “O-ee.”

“Thanks, Dellie,” Ollie chimed in, bolting back to the blond woman and throwing his arms around her waist. “I had the bestest time.”

“It’s ‘got’, not ‘gots,’” Little Alpha piped up from the back seat. “Learn to speak, asshole.”

“Just go away, Teddy,” she slurred, clutching her pillow as sob after gut-wrenching sob escaped her. “I’m tired.” “It’s Joey,” he choked out. “Christ, what have you taken?”

“Okay,” was all I could say in response, while my heart well and truly split down the center. “I’ll be with you, Joe.” Always.

“Hey, stud.” “Hey, queen.” “Nice shirt.” “Nice legs.” Her eyes widened in surprise. I winked.

“You’re…” she whispered, studying me with wary eyes. “You?” “No.” Resisting the urge to bow my head in shame, I held my ground and forced myself to keep eye contact. “But I’m…trying.” To give this girl what she needed. What she deserved.

“Shan?” I demanded, putting the phone to my ear. “What’s going on?” “Joey,” she cried down the line. I could hardly make out her voice from the sheer volume of crying. Instantly, my back was up and the blood in my veins had turned to lava. “I n-need you to come g-get me.”

“What happened to your face, Shannon?” “I want to go home.” I watched with my heart in my mouth as she fell against his big frame and clutched him tightly. “I just want to go.” “It’s okay.” He inspected every inch of her like she was of the greatest importance to him, and I watched as the big lad was overcome with emotion. “Shh, baby, shh.” Seeing her hurt affected him. No, it was more than that. It crushed him. “Just calm down.”

However, the right hook that pancaked the lad on the ground hadn’t been the result of Johnny Kavanagh’s fist, but Joey’s. Always the protector.

“Who the hell are you?” Bella demanded, casting a menacing glare in my direction. Oh, you poor, sweet summer child.

Bitch, please. She was about to get schooled real fast.

“You need to look after that baby.” “And who’s going to look after Joey?”

“First, I’m going to get you out of this mess,” he said, rising to his feet. “And then we’ll talk.”

“We want to keep you!” his wife blurted out, causing John to drop his head in his hands and groan. “All five of you,” she continued, hurrying over to the island and catching ahold of my hand. “Especially you.” She smiled down at me. “I think I want you the most.”

“You’ve been one hell of a father, Joey Lynch.”

“You’re never too old to be loved, Joey.” “My childhood ended a long time ago.”

“Yeah, and I got you good,” I said instead, feeling like a piece of shit for clocking him earlier. “Sorry about that,” I offered with a shrug. “Poor communication skills.” Understatement of the century.

“I love you, Molloy.” “I love you, too.”

“To talk,” my father slurred, holding one hand up, while the other fisted a bottle of his poison of choice. Whiskey. “Just talk, boy. That’s all.”

GO AWAY

My blood ran cold. His words rocked me to my core. Because he was voicing my deepest fears aloud. Worse, he was voicing the truth. Because it was true. I couldn’t leave Molloy alone.

Something was wrong. I could feel it in my bones.

“You’re high.” Darren narrowed his eyes. “Again.” Whoop-de-fucking-doo. “And you’re an asshole,” I shot back. “Again.”

“You broke my mind.”

You’re going to be okay. I’ll make sure of it.

“Joey, please,” she sobbed, clinging to me just the same as always. “What about me?” What about her? What about Tadhg? What about Ollie? What about Sean? What about Darren? “What about me?” I broke down and cried. “What about me, Shannon? What about me!”

“O-ee. O-ee.” Sean’s voice almost broke me, and I sucked in a shuddering breath, too afraid to turn around and look at the baby I’d given up so much of my life to raise. “I’m so sorry.”

It wasn’t a lie. I was going home. I just needed to find him first. Because that boy was my home.

Several weeks of rainfall meant that the town’s river was close to bursting its banks. Good. The current would take me quickly. All I had to do was let go. Just close my eyes and let myself fall. Eerily at peace with my decision, I tossed my bag into the water and watched as the river swallowed it under and washed it away. That could be me. I could just disappear. I will disappear. It’s the best thing for everyone. Especially her.

no

“Nobody was there to stop my sister, but I’m here now. I’m here to stop my best friend’s brother from following my sister!”

“Then get good for her, dammit,” she snapped as the sound of fire engine sirens filled the air. “Don’t throw in the towel and ruin her life before it’s even started. Because that’s what you’ll do. You jump and you’re killing more than just yourself. You’re killing everyone that loves you. You’re sentencing them to a life in prison. Trust me. I should know.”

“Sounds like it’s coming from your neck of the woods.” “Yeah,” I muttered, feeling a wave of unease creep over me as I watched in the distance the stream of fire engines, ambulances, and squad cars speeding toward Elk’s Terrace. “I think you might be right.”

Tell them I was sorry. Tell them I loved them. Tell my son that I loved him. Tell yourself that I loved you most.

“He appears to have been trying to escape through the window.”

WHAT THAT MEANIE

Ollie. Tadhg. Sean. Shannon. Johnny Kavanagh had them? What the fuck?

“They are safe.” Someone was holding me. There was an arm around my shoulder and a big hand covering mine. “And so are you.” Was it God? Was it the Devil? Where the fuck was I? “No,” I mumbled drowsily as I felt the last strand of my sanity snap. “It was my job to keep her safe.”