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“You’re honestly trying to tell me that those two aren’t in love?” “I never said they weren’t in love.” Chuckling, she added, “Only that they’re not together.”
“You think I’m not hurting?” “I don’t know how you feel anymore.” “In love,” I bit out. “With you.” “Don’t…”
While the rest of his friends had long since abandoned their girlfriends and dates, Gibsie hadn’t taken more than three steps away from Claire all night.
“They’re always like this. Like two weird little unicorn magnets drawn to each other.”
Our eyes met, green on green, and he winked at me from across the room. And just like that, I was ruined.
“But you’d better take your own advice and come with me because that moody-looking pal of Shannon’s is looking like she wants to eat that posh boy of yours up.”
“Who, Lizzie?” Katie laughed, trailing after me. “No way. She’s in their super-elite inner circle at school. She’s just a friend.” “Uh-huh.” I rolled my eyes. “Rule one, my innocent little neighbor. Never trust a girl who looks like that around a boy who looks like that.”
“It’s not my business who Joey gets with,” I replied, achingly aware of how close he was standing behind me. “He’s a free agent, and so am I.” “Like fuck we are.” His hand came around my waist, fingers flexing against my flesh as he pulled me backwards into his embrace. “Pack it in.”
“You can’t tell me what to do, Joe,” I growled, feeling a combination of drunk and dizzy. “You don’t own me.” “Well, that’s bad fucking luck on my account, because you sure as shit own me!”
Drunk or not, his words hit me like a wrecking ball to the chest. Feeling the air whoosh from my lungs, I glared up at him, feeling a torrent of emotions crashing through me. “Why would you say that to me?” “Because it’s the truth.” “Since when?” “Since I was twelve.”
I had no doubts that wherever I ended up, this girl would forever have a hold over me.
murmurs of a conversation happening around us, but I couldn’t make out a single word of it, because my entire focus was on the girl who’d been successfully tormenting me from the first day we met.
Because every part of me loved every part of her. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I fucking reveled in all of it.
Taking my hand in hers, she led me onto the dance floor, and like the habit of a lifetime, I followed after her, knowing that this girl was by far my greatest addiction.
“You’re all I want, Molloy.”
“Stop trying to protect me and start making me happy,” she countered, eyes locked on mine. “Because it’s time to pick your poison, Joey Lynch.”
“There’s no decision to make,” he blew my mind by saying, green eyes blazing with heat. “You already know it’s you.”
“It’s you,” he repeated gruffly, fingers tightening on my waist. “I pick you. Every single time.”
“I’ll love you the right way this time,” he whispered, and his breath fanned my cheek. “If you’ll show me how.”
“What I did at Christmas? How far I went? It scared the shit out of me, and all I could think about was if I didn’t get you away from me, I would end up destroying my world, because that’s what you are to me, Aoife. You’re my whole goddamn world wrapped up in one girl. So, yeah, maybe I’ve gone about it entirely the wrong way, but all I’ve ever tried to do is protect you.”
“I’m not your mother or your sister. I’m not another girl who needs something from you. I’m the girl who wholeheartedly wants you. I’m the girl who wholeheartedly loves you. The hurler. The mechanic. The boy. The protector. The asshole. The lover. The addict.” Sniffling, I added, “All of your versions. All of your shapes and colors. I accept them all. So, I don’t care how fucked up in the head you get, or how bad of an idea you decide you are for me. If you can’t be with me, warts and all, then walk away now, because I won’t go through this again with you.”
“I hear you, baby.”
“No more secrets and cover-ups, okay? We’re way past those. Because I’ve never been your enemy,” I squeezed out. “I’ve always been your teammate.”
When she told me that she loved me, she meant it, and it was as unsettling as it was addictive, because if she only felt a fifth for me of what I felt for her, then I was one lucky son of a bitch.
“This is my world. It’s fucking horrible, but I’m willing to show you, if you’re willing to stay.”
Cupping my hands around my mouth, I called out, “Nice abs.” “Nice legs,” he called back with a wink, and just like that, I was ruined.
“Because I’m only doing life for you.”
“How can you compare a weighing scale to a Ouija board?” “Easy.” I shrugged. “They both summon demons.”
“There’s only one head doing the thinking for me now, Molloy, and it’s not the one on my shoulders.”
“Just wanted you to know that you’re someone’s favorite person in the world.”
“You’re someone’s favorite person, too,” he whispered a little while later, when he rolled me onto my back and settled between my legs.
“Don’t want to do this whole life gig without you, Molloy.”
I had wanted her since I was twelve years old, and now that I finally had her, I quickly realized that I would never stop wanting her.
“Molloy.” “Joey,” she acknowledged. “Nice moves.” “Nice legs.”
“You drive me crazy,” he growled against my lips. “You twist me up in knots, queen.”
“It’s only been you,” I heard myself tell her, even though I knew that no amount of damage control could repair tonight. “Since we’ve been together? Since the day you put your lips on mine? It’s only been you, Aoife .”
“You want a future with me, Joe?” “I know that I don’t want one without you, Molloy,” I replied, leaning in to brush my lips against hers. “So that narrows shit down, doesn’t it?”
“Who?” he asked. “Claire?” I nodded. “She’s my intended,” he came right out and said, without a hint of embarrassment. “The fuck?” “It’s true,” he urged, eyes wide and full of sincerity. “We’re betrothed.” “Since when?” “Since she was four and I was six, and I promised her that I would marry her.”
want you to love yourself enough to stop destroying yourself.” “How do you ever expect that to happen when the very person who gave birth to me can’t love me?”
“You should stick to the hugging. Hugging is perfect. Hugging is plenty close enough until you’re twenty.”
“I’ve loved your daughter for six years,” Joey finally broke his silence by saying. “I can easily love her for another eighteen.”
“I’ve been sold on you since I was twelve years old.”
“Joey, you…promised…” A small hand pulled at my arm, breaking my concentration. “You promised you’d…never…leave…me…”
Don’t hate me. I hate me. I hate me. I hate me.
“His name is Reginald Gibson-Biggs,” Gibsie corrected, sitting cross-legged on the plush rug next to his gal pal. “Come on, Claire-Bear. Don’t be greedy. It’s my turn.” Setting a pillow on his lap, he patted it and cooed, “Come to Daddy, Reggie.”
“Those were nature walks,” she explained. “For nature class.” “Well, shit.” He chuckled. “I thought they were movement breaks.”
I was empty. I was done.
“I saw it in his eyes that day in the kitchen. I saw him check out. I know he’s not here anymore. Dad broke Shannon’s lungs, but he broke Joey’s mind and Mam helped him do it.”
“Nothing worth having comes easy.” “And it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
“Joe’s the only parent I remember having, so trust me when I tell you that your kid…” He paused to gesture to my stomach before adding, “Is going to have one hell of a father.”
