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“How’s my penis?” Gripping the sheets around me, I yanked them up to my chest, not trusting that she wouldn’t pull them off and check for herself. “Do you think that’s a normal thing to ask your son?” Mam shrugged. “Would you prefer if I called it a willy, love?”
“Lad, you told her you were in love with her.” He guffawed, slapping his hand against his thigh. “Right before you asked her to have your babies.” My eyes widened. “No!” His grin deepened. “Yes!”
“Stop,” I begged. “Please. Don’t tell me anything else.” “You told the nurse she was your wife,” he added salt to my wounds by saying. “You told your mother all about how nice Shannon’s tits were and how you couldn’t wait to fu—” “Oh, Jesus,”
“Don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining.”
“I’m here, Shannon.” Blue eyes so similar to mine implored me to understand something I never could. “I’m coming home. For good.”
DARREN
“Don’t worry about it,” he hurried to say, tone gruff as he captured my hand and set it back down on my lap. “I’m fine.” No, he wasn’t fine. He was high.
Noooooo joey
She was fifteen years old when she had me—fourteen when she was pregnant!”
My lord
“Did you know that Sean called Joey ‘Da-Da’ until he was two?”
Nooo
“I have something that grows,” a familiar male voice piped up. “It’s growing right now.”
“I know you’re talking right now, babe,” Gibsie said, drawing my attention back to him. “And I’m trying really hard to pay attention, but it’s kind of impossible when all I’m seeing is you and another girl on your bed, braiding hair, with your sexy ass hanging out of those shorts.” Grinning, he added, “Quick, do something else.”
“Holy shit—are you wearing a thong?” “Gerard,” Claire sighed. “Is it red?” He squinted his eyes and then groaned. “It’s fucking red, isn’t it?”
I cannot wait for his book
“I’ll come anywhere you want if you just show me that thong,” Gibsie pleaded, dropping his hands to her waist. “I’ll clean all the pots. I’ll do anything. Just one peek. That’s all I’m asking.” “You’ll come anyway,” she huffed, catching ahold of his school tie and dragging him out of her room. “You’ve got that right,” he agreed, trailing after her like a puppy dog on a lead. “Is your bra red, too?” “I’m not wearing one.” “Oh, Jesus.”
“I fucked it, baby.” Baby? Oh god.
“Johnny?” I squeezed out, heart skittering around wildly. He exhaled a sigh and looked at me with a wary expression like he was trying to gauge my emotions. “Yeah, Shan?” “I love you.” I had no idea why I felt the need to tell him that, but the words seemed to clamber up my throat every time I laid eyes on him. The blue in his eyes blazed with heat. “I love you, too.” “Yeah?” “Yeah.”
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew it was entirely inappropriate to be rolling around on my best friend’s bed with my boyfriend, but my brain could only hone in on the word boyfriend. Everything else was inconsequential in this moment because Johnny was my boyfriend, and my boyfriend had me on my back, making my body shake and tremble. It was the only male touch I’d ever welcomed. He was big and masculine and was using all of his strength to make me feel good.
I remember this feeling awe
“No, hear me out, Shan,” he hurried to say, resting a hand on mine. “I can only tell you what I know,” he added, tone hoarse, eyes heated. “That from the very first day you walked into my life, you changed me. That very first time I saw you? You sparked to life something inside of me.” Releasing a heavy sigh, he shrugged again, eyes locked on mine. “And I haven’t been the same since.”
When I stepped inside my house, I had a feeling Jesus Christ himself was looking down on me because my mother was on a work call, barking orders into a headset while she paced the kitchen floor with a folder in her hand. I swear to God, I could have dropped to my knees and broken out in prayer at the sight. When she tried to make eye contact with me, I quickly hurried upstairs, using the crutch more for her sake than for mine.
“Take it off,” he instructed. “Take your fucking sperm off my ass right this instant!”
“Sperm dies off once it’s released, Gibs.” “Not for seventy-two hours,” he shot back with a shudder. “I was listening to the sex nurses yesterday.”
“Boys?” Mam’s voice filled the air. “What’s the matter—Oh, Gerard, why are you in your underpants?” “Your son”—Gibsie paused to point an accusing finger at me before continuing—“ejaculated on me.”
“I didn’t fucking ejaculate on you,” I shot back, torn between laughing and fucking crying. “I ejaculated and you sat on it.” “Same difference,” he barked, furious. “Same fucking results, Johnny!” “Oh, love, I’m so happy it’s working for you again,” Mam said, sagging in relief. “But you shouldn’t be interfering with yourself when your friends are over.” “What?” I gaped at her. “Are these words actually coming out of your mouth?”
“Now,” Mam said with a weary sigh as she bent down and retrieved Gibsie’s uniform off the floor, “I know I might be behind with the times, and this isn’t something I ever imagined having to say to you, Johnny, but please don’t be ejaculating on Gerard.”
Im cryinggggg
“Ma,” I snapped, flustered. “I had a wank. He sat on the tissue and threw a tantrum. I didn’t ejaculate on him.” “And Jesus wept,” Mam whimpered, pressing a hand to her forehead. “I could have had a daughter. I could have understood a daughter…”
“I’m keeping you, Shannon Lynch.”
Johnny didn’t wait for me to respond before pressing his lips to mine, firmer this time. Deeper. Holding on to his arms, I kissed him back with everything I had, desperately trying to show him how much he meant to me.
“If that’s what you call hand-holding, then I’d really like to know what you call the other shit,” I heard Darren say from somewhere nearby. “Maybe they’re gone beyond hand-holding,” I heard Joey muse. “I can’t always be right.”
“Seriously, can’t you just turn that big sponge of a brain off and just relax?” “No.” I shrugged helplessly. “This is how I’m wired.”
Me
“We’re on a condom run,” Gibsie blurted out, much to my horror. And then he went a step further and gestured to her five small kids. “Something your husband obviously doesn’t buy very often.”
GIBSIE
“That’s it—” Shoving his chair back, Gibsie jerked to his feet. “I’m calling Father McCarthy to intervene on your behalf. You need an exorcism and Jesus.”
“Fuck, I feel like I should put some mood music on,” Gibsie said, causing us both to look at him. My brow furrowed. “Huh?” “Oh, not for you,” he explained. “For me. I’m getting hard watching this.” “Jesus Christ, Gibs,” Johnny barked, lowering me onto his chest so that I was sprawled across him. “The hell is wrong with you?”
Every part of me was wholeheartedly in with this girl. It felt like she had been in my life forever. Like I’d never known anything other than Shannon. She was my first love, and she was scary as fuck to me. Being with her was an obsession that threatened to consume me daily. I had to work my ass off to keep my head in check, but remembering to keep my feet on the ground and my head out of the clouds was easier said than done when I had a girl that knocked me on my ass with one glance. She wrapped me up in childish, illogical, irrational knots, with a new one attaching itself to my heart with
...more
“I’m in love with you, Shannon. I’m completely fucking hooked on you, so when you’re hurt, it affects me. It hurts me. I can’t pretend that it doesn’t.”
“If I had one of those, it would be sticking up, too,” she blurted out, cheeks pink. “For you, I mean. Because I feel the same way about you.”
“You said in five years’ time,” she whispered, curling her arms around my neck. “I already told you, I need you for keeps,” I replied gruffly. “There’s no expiration date between us.”
“You’re so fucking sexy.” His voice was deep and husky and his words took my breath away. “You drive me crazy, Shannon like the river,” he whispered against my lips, rocking my hips against his. “I want you so badly I can’t think straight anymore.”
“I love you, Shannon like the river,” he said, breaking through my depressing thoughts. “Only you.” Leaning back so that I had no choice but to lift my face and look at him, he smirked. “Like, a crazy fucking amount.”
“I’m your mother, Johnny. I housed you in my body for nine months, so no, I don’t believe in knocking,” she shot back, unfazed. “And stop fidgeting around, will you? There’s nothing you have underneath that towel that I haven’t washed, wiped, and talcum powdered.”
Mama Kav is a baddie
Shoving her hand into the laundry basket, she yanked out a white cotton bra. “Imagine my surprise when I was hoovering your room yesterday and found this under your bed.” Aw, shite… Dangling Shannon’s bra from her fingers, Mam arched a brow. “Care to explain?” “Would you believe me if I told you that was mine?” I offered weakly. “It’s not your size,”
“You’ve never said any of that before,” I mused, scratching my jaw. Mam smirked. “Because I’m still holding out hope that you’ll take up golf instead.”
“Come on, Shan. Let’s go make some bleeding babies.”
“Oh my god! Your dad is so hot, Johnny,” Claire gushed, charging into the room after Gibsie.
“You’re more than welcome, Jonathan,” Gibsie replied with a grin. “And you can repay me by not ejaculating on me again.” “What?” Claire and I both laughed in unison.
“I’m your daughter’s boyfriend,” he continued, shoving my father against the car once more before swinging his fist and connecting with my father’s jaw. “And I’ve been dying to meet you.”
“I love you, Johnny Kavanagh,” I choked out, clenching my eyes shut as I grabbed his arm and held it to my chest. “Most in the world.” “I love you back, Shannon Lynch,” he said quietly in my ear and I felt the connection I had to him in the deepest part of my soul. “Most in the world.” “For keeps?” I breathed. He kissed my shoulder. “For keeps.”
Fuck addictive, I was obsessed with my girlfriend. I was in so deep with her that I could hardly breathe and still I jumped in deeper, pushed down further, wanted more and took it, doing whatever I could to just be with her.
