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It was different because it mattered—because we mattered to each other.
“And that feeling in the pit of my stomach, the dread—it’s the most familiar feeling I have. I almost feel like I’m not okay when I’m not worried. I’m not okay with feeling okay.”
“I don’t just like you. I fucking—” Shaking his head, Johnny rubbed his jaw before looking back at me. “Shannon, I love you.” I stopped breathing. “You love me?” He nodded slowly, blue eyes locked on mine. “Like, a crazy fucking amount.” “Really?” “Really,” he confirmed.
Her tears rained down on me, drowning me right along with her, and that was the exact moment I felt the shift, the switch from this being something sweet and innocent to something deeply complicated with the hint of forever.
I’ll take you down, Marie, and I won’t need my husband or any other man to do that for me.”
“Shannon Lynch?” I called out, ignoring the rest of her fucked-up family. “I love you back.”
Sniffling, she lifted her chin from Joey’s chest and looked at me all red-eyed and blotchy. “S-still?” “Still.” I nodded in confirmation. “Like, a crazy fucking amount.”
“I’m not in your corner, Shannon,” Johnny replied in a gruff tone. “I’m standing right beside you.”
from the kitchen muffled the noise, and I jerked my head back to see Shannon’s mother staring right back at me. Holy shit. My heart stopped in my chest and for a few terrifying moments I waited to see what she would do. She nodded ever so slightly. I hesitated. She nodded again. Keeping my eyes glued to her, I slowly pushed the handle down and swung the door inward. She coughed loudly again, drowning out the creak from the hinges as I pushed Tadhg and Ollie through the small crack in the doorway.
It sucks that this is what it took for Marie to do the right thing for once.
It humbled me to see how incredibly resilient these kids were.
Just like I’d seen their sister do on countless occasions. Jesus, they were the ultimate survivors.
And unlike with a blade, the damage felt like buckshot, splaying and splicing me in countless areas and so many irreparable ways.
“I’d throw the whole world away to keep you—them included—and I’m not sorry for it.”
Yes Da, John Sr — I felt this deeply.
