Saving 6 (Boys of Tommen, #3)

by Chloe Walsh

“You shouldn’t settle for comfortable, Molloy. You shouldn’t settle for anything less than being in love to the point of madness. The only person that you should be settling for is the person who unsettles you the most. The person who drives you to the brink of suicide because he or she makes you feel so fucking much that you can’t catch your breath or remotely function without them.

“And what’s more is you won’t want to. You won’t want to breathe, or feel, or fucking function without them. That’s how you’ll know that it’s a real relationship, Molloy. Only when you’re feeling the most discomfort you’ve ever felt in your entire life should you even consider settling. Because that’s when you’ll know you’re in love, which sounds to me like a hell of a lot nicer way to live than settling for someone you have nothing in common with because it’s comfortable.”

Truth be told, my brain was a scary place to be, and I didn’t want to be anywhere near me most of the time.

Choices that had been made for me by people who were supposed to love me but either didn’t have the capacity to love me or just plain didn’t.

Being in love with someone hell-bent on self-destructing was such a lonely place to exist. I felt incredibly helpless, watching on as my boyfriend buried his secrets with lie upon countless lie.

I wanted to save him. I felt like I was watching him drown. That I was desperately reaching my hand out, but his pride was so potent that he would rather go under than let me pull him to safety.

“You might be the addict in this relationship, but you’re also the habit that I need to kick,” she choked out, chest heaving as she turned in my arms to face me. “Because I feel like I’m dying when I’m with you, and I feel like I’m dead when I’m not.”

But I’d been so determined to save him that I hadn’t noticed I’d lost myself in the process.

“Maybe if you did a little more staying, she wouldn’t have to do so much chasing.”