Binding 13 (Boys of Tommen, #1)

by Chloe Walsh

“Do you believe me?” “I want to,” I breathed as my fingers dug into the hard plains of his shoulders—my body’s helpless reaction to his words. God, I want to… “Good,” he replied gruffly, stepping closer, hands tightening on my waistline. “I want that, too.”

“And so he should feel responsible!” Mrs. Kavanagh’s face turned a deathly shade of white when she hissed, “I am going to castrate that little shit—”

“How did he hurt you?” his mother asked, looking troubled and yet massively relieved. I sighed heavily. “With his balls.” “With his balls?” she repeated, looking horrified. “Johnny knocked you out with his balls?”

“Balls? Bumps? Knocking you up?” Mrs. Kavanagh expelled a heavy breath. “Shannon, love, please explain this to me before I have a stroke.”

“Thanks for saving my shoe.” “Yeah, well, thank me by learning how to walk in them,” Johnny shot back in a teasing tone.

“Your mam thought I was your…that we were…that you got me…with your pregnant balls… Ugh—” Clearing my throat, I whispered, “I’m sorry.” Johnny turned back to face me and smirked. “My pregnant balls?” “No, my pregnant and your balls,” I spluttered and then cringed at my words. “Never mind.”

I didn’t know why I was behaving this way. I only knew that something inside of me demanded I protect her.

“You are so lucky you’re a girl right now,” Johnny told me, lips twitching. “Why?” I snickered. “Do you prefer losing to boys?” “Give me that fucking controller,” Johnny growled and then pounced on me.

Mrs. Kavanagh looked between us and then beamed. “He’s a terrible loser, isn’t he?” “I am fucking not!” “I know.” I giggled.

“That girl is fragile, Johnny.” Mam nibbled on her lip, brows furrowed in concern. “There is something about her that makes me want to wrap my arms around her and cuddle the sadness out of her eyes.” Yeah, I knew the feeling. I knew that feeling very fucking well.

“Because you’re my baby,” Mam sniffled. “Oh god, my baby is sexually active.” “No, I’m not,” I coaxed, hugging her. “I promise, I am not having sex.” Right now.

“You meddler,” I accused. “You sexer,” Mam shot back in a tone as equally accusing. For fuck’s sake. I wasn’t going to win here.

This time, when I stepped out of the bathroom, I was prepared for Sookie and found her snoozing on the bed. I was not, however, prepared for the sight of Johnny’s naked ass.

“Someone touched you,” Johnny whispered in my ear, placing his fingers on the marks. “I want to know who.”

“Tell me who put their hands on you,” he coaxed as he stood behind me, my face in his hand and his fingers on my throat. “And I’ll make it better.”

Releasing an unsteady breath, I reached up, grabbed Johnny’s neck, and pulled his face down to mine. And then I kissed him.

“Jesus Christ,” Johnny groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “Of course, I like you.” He tugged on his hair and sighed. “I think it’s pretty fucking clear that I’m mad about you.”

“Stop. I can’t. This is too priceless.” He threw his head back and howled laughing. “Mammy Kavanagh’s a better wingman than I am!” “Focus, Gibs!”

“Did you see—” “Yes,” I snapped and then groaned loudly. “Fuck.” “And?” “Perfect.” “Fuck.” “Yep.”

“But I’m going to find out,” he whispered. “Whether you tell me or not.” He stroked my cheek with his thumb. “I’ll find out and I’ll make them suffer.”

“Wait… You told me all that so I would have leverage over you?” I shrugged. Johnny frowned. “Why would you do that?” “I was trying to make you feel safe,” I blurted out. “You want to make me feel safe?” The expression on Johnny’s face was one I couldn’t decipher as he stared down at me with storm-filled blue eyes. “Why?”

“It’s been you, hasn’t it?” I whispered. “You’re the reason no one gave me hassle over the pitch incident? You’ve been protecting me?”

“I told you that day outside Twomey’s office that I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you,” he finally admitted. Yeah, he did. He promised. And he kept it…

I carefully scrolled through his playlists and almost had a heart attack when my eyes landed on the one named Songs for Shannon.

Coldplay—“Yellow” Guns N’ Roses—“Sweet Child O’ Mine” Goo Goo Dolls—“Iris” The Fureys—“When You Were Sweet Sixteen” Howie Day—“Collide” The Offspring—“Want You Bad” Busted—“Fall at Your Feet” Aerosmith—“Crazy” Counting Crows—“Colorblind” David Gray—“This Year’s Love” Bon Jovi—“In These Arms” Westlife—“World of Our Own”

Eagle-Eye Cherry—“Save Tonight” Metallica—“Tuesday’s Gone” Snow Patrol—“Run” The Verve—“Lucky Man” HIM—“Wicked Game” The La’s—“There She Goes” These were love songs. These were all love songs. Saved to a playlist with my name on it.

“Don’t look so scared,” Johnny said, distracting me once more from my thoughts. “I won’t hurt you.” Reaching over, he tipped my chin up with the back of his hand and gave me a small smile. “I promise.”

“Shannon?” Johnny called after me. Pausing at the door, I swung back to look at him. “Yeah?” His blue eyes burned holes inside of me when he said, “Thanks.” “For what?” I whispered. Johnny smiled. “For being nothing like the rest of them.”

“You’ll come home with me tonight?” he asked gruffly, eyes burning with heat, as he fiddled with that rogue strand of hair of mine. “You still want to do that?”

Without another word, he leaned down and pressed a lingering kiss to my forehead. And then he turned around and walked away.

The sheer depth of my feelings for him was unhealthy. The adoration, the lust, the downright infatuation I had for him…it was insanity. I had never felt this much. I had never felt so consumed.

The vulnerability I had seen in her eyes when she exposed her secrets for my benefit was my breaking point.

I wanted to fight all her battles. I wanted to give her all her smiles and make her laugh and snatch her away from the rest of the world and keep her all to myself. I just wanted her. For keeps.

I knew she was too sweet and pure to be dragged into the limelight that came with my life. And I knew that she was too fucking broken for a guy like me to get tangled up with. But I already felt like I was drowning with her. That’s how consumed I was in this girl. That’s how much I loved her.

“No, no, no, Da. I’m serious,” I slurred. “I think I love that girl.” “Well, who’s this girl?” “She’s a river.” I sighed and closed my eyes. “I’m keeping her, Da.” “Okay, son,” he coaxed. “You keep the girl.” “She makes my heart go, like, whoa.” “Is that right?” he mused. “So bad, Da.” I sighed. “Boom, boom, fucking boom.” I shook my head. “All the time.”

“What happened to being friends, Johnny?” Mam asked. “I lied,” I snickered. “I’ve been lying all along.” “Oh, Johnny,” Mam sighed. “You never had to lie, baby. I like that girl.”

“She’s mine,” I grumbled. “You can’t have her.” Gibsie laughed loudly. “Everyone knows that, Cap.”

“Shannon?” I roared, calling out her name at the top of my lungs. “Shannon?” “Let the girl in, Edel,” Dad mused. “He’s going to scream the place down like a toddler otherwise.” “Shannon!” “Oh Jesus, fine!” Mam muttered. “You better behave yourself, Jonathan.”

“Hi, Johnny.” “Boom, boom, fucking boom, Da,” I groaned, slapping a hand against my chest. “I’m done for.”

“Hi, Johnny,” I said, my voice barely more than a whisper. “Boom, boom, fucking boom, Da,” Johnny slurred, clutching his chest. “I’m done for.”

“Bring the lights back, Da,” Johnny instructed, slurring his words. “Light up the world. You need to see this girl.” “Johnny,” his mother said in a warning tone. “Behave yourself.” “I wanna see her, Ma,” he groaned. “I can’t see her.”

“Come closer,” Johnny purred, his bleary eyes trained on my face as he crooked his finger at me. “I wanna show you something.” “Uh, okay?” Stepping around Gibsie, I moved to his bedside. “Don’t you dare!” Mrs. Kavanagh barked, causing me to jerk back and Johnny to groan. “Spoilsport,” Johnny huffed. “John, tuck those blankets under the mattress,” she instructed before turning her glare on her son. “I don’t care how high you are, Jonathan Robert Kavanagh Jr., I will cut it off if you so much as think about showing her.” “Show me what?” I asked nervously.

“My dick,” Johnny announced, twisting to face me. “You wanna see?” He smiled lazily up at me. “It’s all better now.”

“He’s high, little Shannon,” Gibsie explained, still snickering. “As a fucking kite.”

“I didn’t know where you were,” Johnny continued to tell me as he shook his head, looking all flustered and sounding confused. “I thought I lost you…and my head? My head is hiiiigh as balls, baby.” He called you baby. He called you baby again.

“I love you, Shannon like the river,” he slurred.

“I fucking love you,” Johnny said again. Oh god. He did. He absolutely did. Twice. He’s high, Shannon. He doesn’t know what he’s saying.

“See, Ma,” Johnny said in a groggy slur. “She’ll have my babies—” He twisted his head from side to side until he found my face. And then he smiled. “You’ll have my babies, won’t you?”

“Shannon, I am so sorry,” Mrs. Kavanagh strangled out. “Say it,” Johnny groaned, clutching my hand. “Tell me you’ll have my babies.” “Johnny—” “Just tell me you will,” he begged loudly. “Just say it, Shannon! Please! I can’t take it.” “Sure?” I croaked out, feeling faint. “Whatever you want, Johnny.” “Gibs,” Johnny called out happily. “Did you hear that, lad?” “I sure did, Bulldozer.” “Didn’t I do good, Da?” he continued to rave. “See? I found her!”

“Johnny, I know, but I have to go,” I whispered, flustered. “It’s family only.” “She’s my wife,” he announced then, blowing my mind clean open. “Jonathan Kavanagh,” his mother snapped. “Stop this right now! You’ll scare the girl.” “What are ya talking about?” Johnny slurred. “I’m not scaring her. I love her.”