“She’s sixteen now, and I’m—” I slapped my forehead. “Seventeen.” “What are you talking about, Johnny?” “The fractions, Ma,” I groaned. “They’re closing in.” “Fractions of what, love?” “Not too much longer to wait.” I sighed. “Thank fuck, ’cause I’m in love.” “You’re in love?” I nodded happily. “And she’s a river.” “Well, that’s…lovely, pet,” Mam coaxed, sounding confused. “Good boy.” “I’m gonna sail my boat down her river,” I snickered. “My dick boat.” “Can they knock him back out?” Ma grumbled. “He’s going to give me a stroke with all this talk.” “It’s okay, Ma,” I coaxed. “I’m gonna keep
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