Binding 13 (Boys of Tommen, #1)

by Chloe Walsh

“Why’d you do that?” she whispered, clutching her small face in her even smaller hands. “You hurt me.” “I’m sorry,” I repeated. I felt oddly helpless, and it was a feeling I didn’t like. “I didn’t mean to.” She sniffled then, blue eyes watering, and something inside of me snapped.

:(

“Did you do it on purpose?” “What?” Her words threw me enough to cause me to halt. “No.” Twisting my body so I could look down at her face, I frowned and said, “I would never do that to you.” “You promise?” “Yeah,” I grunted, hitching her up with my arm and melding her body to my side. “I promise.” It was January. It was wet. It was cold. And for some strange, disconcerting reason, I was burning the fuck up on the inside.

“I won’t let you fall,” I automatically replied in a soothing tone. “It’s okay.” I felt her slip and pulled her upright, holding onto the tiny thing for all I was worth.

I’d noticed it earlier of course. She had a striking look about her. But now, seeing her up close like this and being able to count the freckles on her face—eleven by the way—it was hitting home just how striking she was.

“God,” she groaned, grimacing now. “Everyone’s going to be laughing at me.” Those words, that small fucking sentence, brought to life some weird fucking emotion I hadn’t experienced before.

“Yeah,” I replied gruffly, feeling like I would promise all the fucking promises in the world just to make this girl feel better.

Thank fuck for that, because you’re ruining all of me right now, I thought to myself.

It mattered that she was able to do this to me. It mattered that, hours later, I was still thinking about her, wondering about her, and inevitably worrying about her. It mattered that she mattered when no one ever mattered to me before.

Shannon Lynch had eyes the color of midnight blue that wouldn’t stay the fuck out of my head. At least that’s the closest comparison I could find on the countless internet searches I had performed.

My brain’s track of choice: Shannon like the river, with the gorgeous blue eyes, face of an angel, and the troubled past.

“They’ll be here in a few. You should wait around down here and say hi to him.” Winking, he added, “I bet he’d love to see you.”

“Keep looking out for her, Cap,” he said, squeezing my shoulder. “God knows someone needs to.”

The way he moved on the pitch was extraordinary, and I found myself entranced by it.

Johnny’s attention wasn’t on the medic or the referee shouting commands in his ear. He was too busy looking at me.

He looked the epitome of cool, calm, and collected as he answered reporters and thanked the supporters clapping his shoulders, but every few moments, his gaze flickered back to me.

“I know,” Johnny replied with a small smile. “I saw you.”

“I’m fucking talking here, Pierce,” Johnny snapped, turning around to glare at whoever was calling him. “Give me a bleeding minute.”

When she passed me in the hall this morning after first class, I had felt way too fucking excited to see her. Of course, she smiled shyly before dropping her head and hurrying past me, but she was here. She was in my space.

“Bye, Johnny,” I told him in a small voice. His features softened instantly as he looked down at me and smiled. “Bye, Shannon.”

“I was raging, Shannon.” “You were?” I asked, ignoring the way my insides shivered when he said my name.

“And the first conclusion was that I battered you?” I shrugged uncomfortably but gave nothing away. “It happens.” “Not from me, it doesn’t,” he pointed out, tone a little thicker now, eyes locked on mine. “Never from me.”

“You’re a reader,” he finally said. It wasn’t a question. It sounded more like he was banking that piece of information away in his mind.

Bolting over to him, I collapsed on the bed and wrapped my arms around my brother’s neck, clinging to him like he was the only thing holding my world together. Sometimes I thought that might be true.

Sobs

And fathers. Fathers were bastards and men couldn’t be trusted.

“You are so concerned with fighting the bullies at school, Mam,” I sobbed, tears streaming down my cheeks, “when the biggest bully of them all lives under this roof.”

“What happened?” he demanded, glaring down at me. “Who the fuck made you cry?” “What?” I breathed, shaking my head. “I’m not crying.” “Your eyes are red and swollen,” he deadpanned. “You’ve been crying.” His eyes moved to my cheek. “The fuck happened to your face?”

“Give me a name,” Johnny growled, dropping his hands to his hips. “And I’ll take care of it.” “What—no! I’m grand,” I quickly replied. “I have allergies.” “Me too. To assholes and bullshit,” Johnny snarled. “Now, tell me who made you cry and I’ll fix it.”

There was nothing forgettable about the girl, and I found myself gravitating toward her, wanting to find her looking at me, and then growing frustrated when she didn’t. Knowing that I would listen to whatever she had to say, whenever she wanted to say it, regardless of time or inconvenience, was a frightening concept.

I didn’t need to look up to know who I had bumped into, though. I would recognize his voice anywhere.

have no bleeding clue what’s happening to me. I just know that my gut is telling me not to leave you right now.

Every cell in my brain was projecting nothing but rage and vengeance, demanding I take back what they took from Shannon.

“Now,” I sneered, glaring down at their faces. “Who wants to call my girlfriend a whore to my face?”

“Uh, okay?” Blowing out a shaky breath, I gingerly shifted my legs onto his lap. “Is that good for you?” “Yeah, Shan.” Offering me a small smile, he reached for his bottle of water and took a swig. “You’re good for me.”

You could love this girl your whole life, the crazy thought persisted inside my brain over and over, if you just let yourself.

Straight to your house because I wanna fuck your sister, I thought to myself. I smirked at the fabulous notion, and then hunted the crazy thought away with a shake of my head.

Probably love her, too, I mused to myself, a fucking lot, before pushing that madness out as well.

“Over!” I hurried to explain, dragging myself back onto the seat. “I fucked her over on her first day. Embarrassed her on the pitch when I knocked her out.” But I want to fuck her… I want in your sister so bad you wouldn’t believe it… The things I imagine doing to her would shock you…

Because of her. Because he was important to her. Because if I hit him, I would hurt her. And hurting her was bad. Hurting her made me want to hurt something harder.

Inhaling a steadying breath, I said, “I know I don’t say this often, but I want you to know that I love you and I’m so bloody grateful that you’re my big brother.”

“I want you to stay with me.”

I did something incredibly reckless. I crawled onto his lap. Johnny’s entire frame tensed, and his hands fell away from my body, but I didn’t stop. I couldn’t. With my knees on either side of his thighs, I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his neck. “What do you want me to do, Shannon?” Johnny strangled out. “Tell me what to do here.” “Hold me,” I sobbed, burying my face in his neck. “Don’t let go.” “Okay.” One of his large hands cupped the back of my head and the other moved to my back as he held me to his chest, slowly rocking me on his lap. “I won’t,” he whispered, folding me up in his arms.

Trembling, I clung to his body and prayed for him to be my strength in this moment because I couldn’t do this anymore.

He blushed, causing me to blush a much deeper shade of red. Oh god…

A little while later, when my eyes began to droop, he lifted his arm, and I didn’t even flinch when it came down around my shoulder. Instead, I nestled my cheek against his side and closed my eyes, allowing myself to drift off to sleep without an ounce of fear in my heart because it couldn’t exist inside of me, not when this boy had his arm around me.

There was something very fucked up about her life. Something that made me want to snatch her away and take her with me, wherever that may be.

Stay. Stay with me, Shannon. I can keep you safe…

“Yeah, but he’s her horse in the race,” Helen reasoned. “Operation Binding Thirteen, anyone?”

“You think I’d let anyone hurt you?” Johnny finally asked, his eyes dark and intense and focused solely on my face. “You think I’d let anything bad happen to you, Shannon like the river?”

If she was here, then she was here with me. She was mine and I didn’t want to share.

When I turned back, I found Shannon standing exactly where I left her, watching me with a nervous expression. She had her arms wrapped protectively around herself, with her long brown hair drenched from the rain and sticking in wet clumps to her face, and in my whole life, I’d never seen anything so beautiful.