More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Shannon Lynch had eyes the color of midnight blue that wouldn’t stay the fuck out of my head. At least that’s the closest comparison I could find on the countless internet searches I had performed.
“Hi, Johnny.” What was wrong with me? Seriously? Did I just wave at him? While I was talking to him? God… The smile he was sporting grew into a full, perfectly straight pearly-white smile. “Hi, Shannon.”
“You most of all, you big blond eejit, with your rugby-shaped head,”
“Please don’t do to me what Darren did to us.” Folding my hands under my cheek, I whispered, “Don’t leave me.” “I won’t,” my brother vowed, tone laced with grit and sincerity. “I won’t ever leave you here with him.”
“You are so concerned with fighting the bullies at school, Mam,” I sobbed, tears streaming down my cheeks, “when the biggest bully of them all lives under this roof.”
“What happened?” he demanded, glaring down at me. “Who the fuck made you cry?” “What?” I breathed, shaking my head. “I’m not crying.” “Your eyes are red and swollen,” he deadpanned. “You’ve been crying.” His eyes moved to my cheek. “The fuck happened to your face?”
“Now,” I sneered, glaring down at their faces. “Who wants to call my girlfriend a whore to my face?”
You could love this girl your whole life, the crazy thought persisted inside my brain over and over, if you just let yourself.
“You think I’d let anyone hurt you?” Johnny finally asked, his eyes dark and intense and focused solely on my face. “You think I’d let anything bad happen to you, Shannon like the river?”
“I’m sorry,” I squeezed out, clasping my hands together anxiously. “Your mam thought I was your…that we were…that you got me…with your pregnant balls… Ugh—” Clearing my throat, I whispered, “I’m sorry.” Johnny turned back to face me and smirked. “My pregnant balls?” “No, my pregnant and your balls,” I spluttered and then cringed at my words. “Never mind.”
“Someone touched you,” Johnny whispered in my ear, placing his fingers on the marks. “I want to know who.”
Releasing an unsteady breath, I reached up, grabbed Johnny’s neck, and pulled his face down to mine. And then I kissed him.
“Jesus Christ,” Johnny groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “Of course, I like you.” He tugged on his hair and sighed. “I think it’s pretty fucking clear that I’m mad about you.”
And for what it’s worth, I would have lost my shit, too,” he told me. “If some bitch talked about Claire like that, I would have blown ten head gaskets.”
“Do you mind?” I asked then. He smirked. “No, baby, I don’t mind.” My heart stopped in my chest. Johnny’s face flushed and he shook his head. “I mean—” “It’s okay,” I whispered. “It’s fine.”
Well, I love you, Johnny Kavanagh! Even though you’re leaving. Even though you don’t feel the same. Even though loving you is going to break my heart. I love you with everything I have. And I probably always will.
I carefully scrolled through his playlists and almost had a heart attack when my eyes landed on the one named Songs for Shannon. With my heart racing, I cast a quick peek up at Johnny, but he was still fully immersed in vulgar sign language with Gibsie. Exhaling a small puff of air from my lungs, I pressed into the playlist and quickly scrolled through the list of songs. Coldplay—“Yellow” Guns N’ Roses—“Sweet Child O’ Mine” Goo Goo Dolls—“Iris” The Fureys—“When You Were Sweet Sixteen” Howie Day—“Collide” The Offspring—“Want You Bad” Busted—“Fall at Your Feet” Aerosmith—“Crazy” Counting
...more
“I’m gonna sail my boat down her river,” I snickered. “My dick boat.” “Can they knock him back out?” Ma grumbled.
“Hi, Johnny.” “Boom, boom, fucking boom, Da,” I groaned, slapping a hand against my chest. “I’m done for.”
“Show me what?” I asked nervously. “My dick,” Johnny announced, twisting to face me. “You wanna see?” He smiled lazily up at me. “It’s all better now.” Gibsie threw his head back and howled laughing. Mr. Kavanagh joined him. “And Jesus wept,” Mrs. Kavanagh sobbed.
“I love you, Shannon like the river,” he slurred. My heart stopped. Did he just? No. No, of course he didn’t. “I fucking love you,” Johnny said again.
“I think I need you for keeps,” he slurred. “I think I need you for keeps, too,” I confessed.
“Get off her!” a voice cried out. My eyes landed on my eleven-year-old brother standing in the doorway and my heart sank. “No, Tadhg,” I strangled out. “Go back upstairs.”
“Leave my sister alone,” Tadhg growled, taking a step into the kitchen. “Your sister’s a cunt,” Dad slurred, focusing his attention on my little brother. “Are you going to defend a cunt, boy?” “Ollie,” Tadhg called out bravely. “Get help.” Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed my nine-year-old brother cowering in the hallway with three-year-old Sean tucked under his arm.
“Stop!” Tadhg was screaming, beating his fists against our father’s back. “You’re killing her.” “Tadhg, run…” Gasping for air, I tried to scramble to my feet, but Dad caught my ponytail and dragged me clean off the ground. “You’re a little fucking liar,” he snarled seconds before his fist connected with my face. “A dirty whore.” “Shannon!” my little brother screamed, flailing helplessly. “Shannon!” “I’m sorry,” I strangled out, coughing when blood trickled down the back of my throat. “Please, stop—”
Joey. I could hear Joey. He was here. And suddenly the pain was gone. The kicking stopped. The feel of two pairs of hands wrapping around my body filled my senses—what was left of them—and I opened my eyes to the sight of my little brothers attempting to protect my body with theirs. Tadhg was bleeding. At least, I thought he was. His cheek was smeared in bright-red blood. Maybe it was my blood. I couldn’t tell anymore.
“You’re okay,” he whispered in my ear, pulling me into his arms. “I’m here… I’m here, Shan.” Numb to the bone, I just sat there, slumped against his big body, my hands hanging limply at my sides, while my brother tried to comfort me.
