Only Once

by Ashley Munoz

“Logan was never my husband.” She exhaled heavily. What? Why the hell hadn’t Logan locked her down?

The kids ignored us, fixated on whatever was on the television, but those blue eyes I had apparently never stopped loving went wide in shock.

She gasped. “Bexley? Sweetie, is that you?” Tears threatened to fall as unspoken apologies clogged my throat. A thousand times I’d wanted to look her up, see if she still lived here…apologize for what I did to her son. A thousand times I’d wanted to tell her how grateful I was for her kindness when she’d first met me, how much I wanted her to be my mother-in-law one day, how I had honestly thought that was where our future would take us.

I tried to take a step back, to put some distance between us, but his hand shot out and latched onto my hip, keeping me in place. “Stop leaving me,” he whispered harshly, so low that I thought I might have imagined it, but the burn on my hip told me I hadn’t.

It was easier, I’m sure. Where I was obsessed with every facet of Ryan’s life, he was satisfied with the version of Bexley he had in front of him.

He stopped coloring on the page in front of him and scooted a few inches closer to my side until he was holding my hand under the table. My heart wilted like a dandelion caught in an unexpected storm.

Sitting up and crawling closer, I inspected the dark ink I’d dismissed each time I saw him bare-chested. A gasp shuddered past my lips as I saw what was stamped there. “You tattooed my name over your heart?”

“No one ever talks about that part of love, how imperfect and painful it is, how necessary it is to fully love and appreciate someone.”

“I sabotaged my last relationship waiting for you…I won’t do that again. When I find love again, I’m going all in. Future me deserves that kind of happiness.”

AMEN

“Ryan, we’ve done this dance before, and now my feet are bleeding and bruised. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Because you’re not my second choice, Bexley Black. You’re not an afterthought. I made the worst mistake of my life letting you assume you were anything less than my everything. I love you. You’re it for me. Acting was never supposed to be the thing I loved…it was only ever you.”