The Art of Husbandry (Mackenzie Country, #1)

by Jay Hogan

“Luke had a fling with some young guy a while back, and it . . . hurt. I felt . . . forgotten, I guess, and it seemed like he was moving on from Callie, leaving me behind. I was so fucking angry with him. I still am if I let myself feel it. But I know it’s not fair. I know he was just trying to have a life again, and it’s not like we were together. Tucker told me it didn’t last long, but I just couldn’t understand how Luke could do that.” I stepped back and let my gaze drift over Holden’s face. “And then I kissed you that day in the woolshed.” I ran my thumb over his full lips. “And I felt more alive than I’d done in years. And suddenly—” I looked him in the eye. “—I understood.” He took hold of my hands. “What did you understand?” I took a few seconds to think, wanting to get the words right. “I understood that grief and attraction and like and love don’t compete in some kind of linear race where only one can be in the lead at any one time. It’s more like a washing machine—everything present at the same time in a tangled, messy jumble. Sometimes one thing is on top, sometimes another. But paying attention to one doesn’t mean all the other stuff disappears.” Holden smiled and kissed my forehead. “And that’s why they pay you the big bucks.”