Made for People: Why We Drift into Loneliness and How to Fight for a Life of Friendship

by Justin Whitmel Earley

Neither fight nor flight is faith. Faith means we live with a painful acknowledgment that everything about the present is uncertain, and yet we act in light of a good future that we believe is certain.

To be a friend is to stand together facing all this mess of life and say, “Instead of letting the future shape our friendship, let’s work to make this friendship shape our future.” It is an act of faith.

When we avoid commitment because we want to be able to choose again tomorrow, we’re acting out of faith in ourselves, that we’re the kind of people who will choose well tomorrow. The fact is, we usually aren’t.

Grace, as it turns out, is a much sturdier foundation for relationship than perfection. Grace means that the failures of friends can be the cause of our coming together, not the cause of our falling apart.

Iron does not sharpen iron without a great deal of noise, heat, and colliding.

In the pursuit of happiness, you’ll find neither happiness nor holiness. In the pursuit of holiness, you’ll find both.