Powerless (The Powerless Trilogy, #1)

by Lauren Roberts

the drinking game for this book is take a sip of your drink for every eye colour mention. take a shot if the description is particularly dramatic

The thin tan line on his now empty ring finger was my first clue that he was formerly married. Then, there’s the fact that he moved his wedding band to his other hand rather than pawning it off for money, telling me that he still cares for his ex-wife and is probably still pining over her. The disheveled hair, crumpled uniform, and smell of whiskey on his breath further prove that he is obviously a single man who no longer has a wife to make him look presentable.

“I need you to investigate and eradicate the problem.” Eradicate equals execute.

thanks for the clarification, i thought "eradicate" meant "go to dinner with"

I study her face as I try again and again to sense her power. Normally, this would be the part where I either throw the girl over my shoulder and carry her to the dungeons to be further examined, or I simply kill her on the spot due to the mere suspicion of her being an Ordinary. And yet, I don’t move.

“I’ll keep it under consideration, darling.” She gives me a small smile, holding my gaze while continuing to back away. “And thank you for saving me from eating cobblestone. I seem to be cursed with clumsiness.” “Well, your clumsiness found me, so I’d hardly call it a curse.”

if i witnessed this conversation, i would have killed both of them on the spot

In short, I’ve been torturing the man for hours. I’ve made zero progress, and my small amount of patience is now nonexistent. I’m annoyingly amazed at how much torture this man can tolerate, although, I suppose that pain becomes a familiar thing when you are continually inflicting it upon others. You become numb to it.

if you're gonna include a torture scene, you legally have to actually describe a torture method, and not just say you're torturing someone

I take one last look at the bloodied, slumped man in the corner of his cell before turning to my father’s Silencer. “I’m done here, Damion. You’re free to go.”

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE DONE? YOU'VE GIVEN ME NO INFORMATION AS TO HOW YOU'VE TORTURED THIS GUY? DID YOU USE THE OTHER SILENCER? DID YOU BEAT HIM UP? HELLO? WHAT HAPPENED?????

Not to mention that if the Trials don’t kill me, being discovered as an Ordinary most definitely will.

YEAH I GET IT. TRIALS BAD BC EVEN IF SHE SURVIVES, THEY'LL FIND OUT SHE'S AN ORDINARY. I GET IT

Her next words are little more than a murmur. “All I know is that this year is supposed to be… different.”

of course the trials will be different this year. of course they will. ***edit: you will be beaten over the head with this over the course of this book

And now she’s sitting right in front of me.

i can't wait to hear all about how these two definitely don't want to fuck

Perhaps I’ll relieve him of one of his hands, so he never has the opportunity to lay it on a woman again.

it's funny that kai is concerned about his imperials hitting a woman, but he was happy to banish an entire family earlier. peak liberal feminism. i'll allow it because it's believable that he would think this makes him a good person

Such as the Trials and the possibility—the likelihood—of my impending death.

I GET IT. YOU'RE TRYING TO NOT THINK ABOUT THE TRIALS SHDHDJJSHSSKJDKSJSKJSKJDNDKSJSKKSNDKSKSKKS SOMEONE TAKE ME OUT

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I stomp toward Kai, closing the distance between us in a matter of seconds. “What if I didn’t duck, huh?” He shrugs. Shrugs. “Then, I would’ve had less competition to worry about.” “So, you’re admitting that I’m a threat to you?” “I never said that.” “But you implied it.” “Don’t flatter yourself.”

this banter is honestly about as engaging as one of the characters grabbing the other's arm and beating them with it while repeating "stop hitting yourself" over and over

I can already feel my feet beginning to blister in the too-tight, strappy sandals Ellie insisted I wear.

bro they couldn't have carted them across in a carriage?

The room beneath is cast in shadows, making it impossible to see how far down the floor is. I sigh before stepping off the edge and into the darkness. My feet hit the ground with a soft thud. After estimating that the drop was nearly seven feet, I’m thankful that the ground beneath my sandals is plush.

why the fuck do they need to jump down a hole to get to their interviews lmfao. 7 foot drop as well? what the fuck is going on.

Looking around, I find the space filled with plushy chairs and couches along with an assortment of snacks sprawled out on a long table, making it clear that we are waiting here until the interviews start.

WHY WAS THE ENTRANCE TO THIS ROOM A LITERAL HOLE IN THE CEILING THEY HAVE TO DROP THROUGH??? WHAT KINDA WACK DESIGN???

The Brawny doesn’t even need to jump to grab hold of the lip before easily pulling himself off the floor and through the trapdoor. One by one, the boys help themselves up into the room above until only the two princes remain.

AND NOW TO LEAVE THEY HAVE TO PULL THEMSELVES UP THROUGH A DIFFERENT TRAP DOOR IN THE CEILING???? WHAT IS THIS ROOM DESIGN???? DO LADDERS NOT EXIST??? also two_princes-spin_doctors.mp3

Kai is gripping the bottom seam of my dress, his eyes flicking up to mine. “May I?” His voice is soft, tone amused. I swallow, roll my eyes once again, and nod against my better judgment. And then he’s ripping my dress. He tears the fabric easily, creating a slit up the side of my thigh, freeing me from the tight confines of the fabric. His rough fingers briefly brush my skin as he says, “I am more than willing to rip your dresses for you, Gray. To help, of course.” Kitt snorts while Kai smirks. “You only need to ask.”

okay the trapdoor was here so paedyn could be too stubborn to ask for help, and then when she finally does bc her dress is too tight, kai gets to tear a slit in it. and the drop into the room was just so she could stumble into kai. both not good enough reasons for this absolutely insane room design. GET A LADDER AT LEAST.

The Imperials lead us to a small opening in the railing opposite the box, where stairs have been placed for us to get into the Pit below.

oh NOW there are stairs???

Tealah. Ironic that her bright teal hair matches her name. I’d never seen the young woman who conducted the interviews for the previous Trials, but I’ve heard enough about her unique appearance to identify her. “Oh, but this is no ordinary Trials!” She beams at the crowd, flashing her white teeth.

oh my god they have budget caesar flickerman

Jax plops down in the chair angled toward Tealah at the front of the stage with a shy smile on his face. He fidgets, one of his long legs bouncing on the ground as she pelts him with idle questions about his life and the Trials.

i realise suzanne collins doesn't have a monopoly on an outgoing personality with dazzling, white teeth and bright hair conducting interviews with contestants in a fight-to-the-death-esque competition but. come on. you gotta admit it's enough to be weird

“All right, Jax, one more question before you show us what you can do.” Tealah looks suddenly serious as she says, “What are you expecting from the Trials?”

bro the formatting is identical to the flickerman interviews

Except, it seems, when it comes to the Silencer cowering on the dungeon floor before me. It’s been days. I’ve beaten this man to a bloody pulp, and what have I learned in return? Nothing.

okay so the torture method is just beating this guy up. BORING.

I grab his jaw and pry it open to reveal the blood pooling in his mouth, over his tongue, staining his teeth scarlet. “But I could easily make that happen. I could carve out your tongue.”

you should have already done that

“Aren’t you up early for a prince?” she calls over her shoulder. “What, no breakfast in bed?” I catch up to her easily, taking about three strides before I’m walking beside her. “If you’re not getting breakfast in bed, neither am I. I’m just a regular contestant, remember? No longer a charming prince for the time being.” “You were never that to begin with.”

okay i get enemies to lovers is a thing but like. this is just so forced. like paedyn has a reason to hate this guy, but she keeps playing with him way too much. i feel like it would make way more sense if she was a lot more quiet and guarded. but then we couldn't have this "amazing banter" everyone was talking about

Weapons. Fighting. Killing. This was what I was raised to do. This is why I’ll be the Enforcer and the one fighting in the Trials, not Kitt.

YES I KNOW. FIGHTING IS WHAT YOU WERE RAISED TO DO. AND NOT KITT. YOU'VE ONLY SAID THIS TEN THOUSAND TIMES.

But for whatever reason, I refuse to throw my whole weight behind the punches.

for whatever reason? i know the reason. it's because you wanna fuck her

One minute we’re flirting and the next we’re fighting—possibly even both at the same time. I can’t seem to figure this vicious girl out.

the world's most forced flirting and fighting. paedyn does not have enough hatred for kai considering his dad killed her dad

Yes, the Trials are a series of physical games, but they are just as deadly when it comes to the mental ones. I need to win over the people, convince them that I love these Trials as much as they do.

STOP STARTING EVERY PAEDYN CHAPTER WITH PAEDYN EXPLAINING HOW SHE NEEDS TO BE CONVINCING AND MAKE EVERYONE BELIEVE HER LIE THAT SHE HAS POWERS

She’s confusing, captivating, and we’re completely wrong for each other in all the right ways. She’s a flame, and I’m going to get burned. An ocean and I’m going to drown.

"she's a flame and i'm going to get burned. an ocean and i'm going to drown." and i'm a nuclear bomb about to shut all of you up forever.

I’m sure the rest of Ilya is just as confused as I am about this year’s Trials. Though, I can’t say we weren’t warned.

OH MY GOD STOP BEATING ME OVER THE HEAD WITH THE FACT THAT THESE TRIALS ARE DIFFERENT HOLY SHIT

I nock it, aim, and breathe deeply just as my father taught me to. And then I send the arrow flying toward its mark.

wowwww. she's good with throwing knives, she can punch well, she can make arrows AND she can shoot arrows? so well she gets a rabbit through the eye???

and the cocky bastard

if i have to read "cocky bastard" one more time.... i'd make a threat, but i know i'd have to follow through with it, because i absolutely will be seeing the words "cocky bastard" again

I nock an arrow and draw my bow before I’ve even turned to face the owner of that broken little voice. I choke on my gasp. It’s me.

paedyn stumbles across kitt's dead body, but it's clear now it's another contestant using their abilities to make bitches see things that aren't there to project an image of kitt's dead body, and not actually dead kitt. but that would have been a SICK story. the future king somehow ends up in the trials, blair or someone else kills him, specifically to frame paedyn for it, and then the aftermath of paedyn dealing with people thinking she killed the future king. now i want a book where THAT'S the story. that would be more interesting than this slop

when his fingers brush my ankles, slowly running up each of my legs. He’s trying to find the wound.

feeling someone up seems like a pretty stupid way to find a wound. tearing her clothes off would be a better idea. alternatively, just look for blood????

She’s too stubborn to die, and I’m too stubborn to let her.

oh my god i knew i'd be heading into a kai chapter considering paedyn just passed the fuck out but holy shit i don't care what he think about all this. he's gonna be way too torn up about paedyn being injured, and then he's gonna be like omg why do i care so much for this girl i hardly know..... but she's a good fighter so i can't let her die...... and she's so mysterious..... and omg maybe i have feelings for her....... sorry. i think i got possessed halfway through that.

I press the cloth against her wound, letting the salve seep into the gash. Slowly, I make my way across the cut, watching as the steady flow of blood already begins to slow.

literally the magic salve from the hunger games. AGAIN I REALISE SUZANNE COLLINS DOESN'T HAVE A MONOPOLY ON MAGICAL HEALING SALVES BUT FUCK ME SIDEWAYS

I felt like I needed to say it. Felt like I needed to admit that to her, to myself. What I do—what I’ve done—has had a purpose, a reason. I’m still a monster, just not the kind that loves the hateful things they do.

this like "i'm a monster, but not one who revels in doing evil shit" shit is just like... i don't care??? you haven't really established how kai is a monster other than he "tortured" one dude and then was totally fine about it, and is the king's son. but like. if you're gonna give us access to his thoughts then like??? idk???? make him a bit more tortured over his decisions or something bro

“Which one of them did this to you?”

oh here we go. "who did this to you" trope. which like sure, whatever. BUT THAT IS THE WHOLE POINT OF THESE TRIALS. PEOPLE WOULD GET FUCKED UP.

My fingers find her chin and then I’m tugging her face back in my direction so I can look her in the eyes as I say, “I’m going to ask again. Who did this to you?”

"I'm going to ask again. Who did this to you?" bro i am straight up ready to combust. i feel like committing domestic terrorism. i'm going to blow something up.

Whether because of the pain or because I finally said her name, I’m not sure. I’m reminded of when she hit the ground.

"i'm reminded of when she hit the ground" WHAT DO YOU MEAN???? THAT WAS LESS THAN AN HOUR AGO. WHY DO YOU NEED TO BE REMINDED OF IT.

i keep having to take breaks to put my head in my hands

I dab the salve onto his wound, and he hisses when it stings. “Daughter of a Healer, remember?”

oh so she knows herbs and how to make medicinal salves too. girl knows everything.

“Living in a castle is not as appealing as it may seem. It can be cold, crowded. Not to mention that you’re constantly watched by prying eyes.”

oh boohoo growing up in a castle was hard

“Kitt and I made the palace a home. We made friends with the servants,

wow they made friends with the servants. how charming.

“Who,” I swallow, “who did that to you?”

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE

I’m the expendable son.

oh shit he's the prince harry 2023 biography spare

All traces of the frantic, ruffled male are gone.

using male as a noun violation

“Is that why you hate me so much? Because you thought I was like my father who you clearly don’t care for?”

JUST IN CASE YOU FORGOT PAEDYN HATES THE KING. CALL THIS BOOK 1995 HIT SONG YOU OUGHTA KNOW BY ALANIS MORISSETTE WITH THE WAY I'M HERE TO REMIND YOU.

“Your favorite color. What is it?”

oh no. don't ask him what his favourite colour is. oh no.