A Ship of Bones and Teeth

by Karina Halle

and some might even deride this book to be “dark fantasy porn.”

my type of book

A whole new world awaited me.

wrong movie babe

Of course, I had seen men before. Before my mother disappeared, she would often bring them down to the depths of Limonos and offer their organs to us. Asherah, the first born, would get the heart, Larimar would get the liver, and I would usually get a kidney.

delicious ..?

As a Syren our first instinct is to lure men to their death.

I’m a feminist for sure

I didn’t understand English at the time, but I eventually realized they addressed him as “Prince Aerik.”

why’s he named like a Targaryen 😭😭

“Not all men are created equal,” she said sharply.

clearly someone has never read the Declaration of Independence e

Throw yourself off the ship, I tell myself. Let the seas claim you. Better to drown and die than live with that man and the man he’ll become again.

damn she’s depressed

“But the Brethren are just tall tales, aren’t they?” I ask. “They aren’t really a ship of the undead and damned.”

girl you are literally a mermaid you don’t believe in pirates 😭

Then I leap off the bowsprit and onto the ship. The crew member tries to grab his weapon but I’m at him in a second. I immediately run my sword across his neck, slitting his throat, the blood spilling out and splashing onto my boots.

the crew member just here for a check 💀

I expect her to scream for help or try to swim away. Instead, the princess punches me right in the face.

she’s the moment she’s the movement

“Ah yes, Desperados,” the captain says appreciatively.

isn’t that a Rihanna song

“You see, luv,” he says, his voice taking on a raspy quality and I feel him lean in closer to me, his breath hot on my cheek,

ew don’t call me luv with a “uv”

“Acapulco!” I exclaim. “In New Spain?” “Tis a long voyage, yes, but the Nightwind has made it countless times. I dare say we’ll get to know each other pretty good by then. You may not even want to disembark.”

does the slave trade happen in this universe 😭 sorry intrusive thoughts but I need to know

Yes, I could have let them all survive, but the truth is that killing is part of my nature, no different than a jaguar in the jungle. People

ok sure,, you probably don’t need therapy or anything at all

With thoughts of her on my mind, I get up, my cock at a stand. Naturally it wasn’t just her attitude that warmed me to her, but how damn desirable she looked in that wet gown.

damn already 😭 bro you can’t have a Hardon for someone you saw once

I know I was rough with her last night but I’d never hit a woman.

men who will kidnap women but never hit them >>>

He growls at me, a pathetic mewling

he’s whimpering isn’t he

“I’ll never be one of you,” I tell him in an icy tone, my gaze matching it. “But why be a princess, when you could be a pirate?”

Keira knightley coded

But the individual windowpanes are too small to fit through, especially with my ample chest and rear, and fastened by metal bars that I’m not strong enough to break.

she’s too thicc to fit through the windows omg

There are things for them to eat. Instead, I think they hunt men out of sport, much like men hunt the fox with their hounds.”

they definitely hunt for sport but men deserve it

Either way, those questions are quickly shoved to the back of my mind when I see her face so close to mine, her fingers pressed gently on the side of my face, her gaze focused on my lips. It doesn’t matter that we are at the bottom of the sea, all I want, all I need, is to kiss her once and for all.

wait we’re still at the bottom of the ocean? someone send this girl to get the submarine

“Don’t stand on the reef,” she chastises me. Her haughty tone irks me, like she’s back to acting like a princess again. “And pray tell, why not?” “Because you’re damaging them.” I stare down through the clear water to my boots. “Who?” “The coral are living creatures. You’re hurting them.”

our ocean loving queen

“You already kissed me.” Her eyes glint. “I wasn’t that impressed.”

she said YOUR KISSES SUCK

She throws up her hands in frustration. “You and your incessant excuse of survival. What in sodding hell does that even mean?” “It means if I didn’t protect you, the crew would try and eat you.”

😭 what

I manage to move my throat enough to spit in his face. My spit lands on his forehead, a sliver of fish bone in it. He grunts and reaches up with his other hand, wiping it away. “Do it again,” he whispers, eyes dancing darkly. “This time in my mouth, please.” He opens his mouth, showing me his tongue, wanting it.

YOOOO

The hold is full of bodies. The bodies of his crew, piled high. Dead. I let out an ear-piercing scream and Ramsay stares in total shock, anguish and terror contorting his face in the light of the flame, while it shines on the pale, still faces of Sam, Henry, Thane, Cruz…

omg they’re all dead :0

“They’re sleeping,” she explains. “A bit of magic, hope you don’t mind. They were so unruly and loud once I stuck them down in the hold that I needed some peace and quiet.”

oh, haha 😭 imagine if they all died that would be some ASOIAF level madness

“You sure you don’t want my company tonight?” I ask, lowering my voice. She gives me a quick smile. “I think I’ve had what I needed.” Then she opens the door and closes it on my face.

Im a feminist first

“That’s the way, Henry boy,” he says to him, giving him an affectionate pat on the shoulder. “I before E.” “Except after C,” Henry says proudly.

were they saying this in the 1700s 😭 this feels like a modern phrase

“I wanted to apologize for acting strangely lately,” I say, staring down at my hands in my lap, wincing at the dirt under my fingernails. “I know I’ve been short with you and I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”

mature conversations are HOT

I feel my cheeks going red. “And now I’ve made the lady blush,” he says. “How I’ve missed that particular color of pink. Same as your nipples and your cunt when I’ve had my tongue on them.”

bruh I thought we were talking about feelings now we’re fucking LMAO

I dip my head and lick the moisture off of him and he jerks, his hands gripping the edge of the chair, letting out a deep moan that seems to fill the room. “Christ, woman, you’re going to make me come already.”

damn one pump and he’s done 😭

Cruz pulls out his violin and strikes up a tune to get everyone’s hearts going and their nerves ready, then Drakos runs around giving shots of rum.

is he producing battle music 😭 bruh why are you fiddling at a time like this

“Let go,” he says, biting my neck but not piercing the skin. “Now.” “Aye Captain,” I manage to say which brings out a huff of amusement from him, his breath hot on my neck.

LMAO pls don’t say that during sex haha

The lady you just tried to take, my lady, had been kind enough to consider marooning you. You won’t be marooned now. Now you’re going to eat your own cock before I chop your head off. The taste of your own shortcomings is the last thing you’ll know.”

I’m a feminist first frfr

My jaw tightens. “You didn’t give them blood did you?” She gives me a tired smile. “It’s all in a bottle. Thane has hidden it. Please don’t be mad.”

hope she got a cookie afterwards

Besides, she would have grown up to be half-witch and half-bloodsucker and the world doesn’t need the likes of that.

this is a reference to her other books 😭

I look back to Maren in horror. Her body is being used to kill me while her soul is in Edonia’s necklace, perhaps watching the whole thing. “No,” I tell her, pleading. “No, don’t do this. Maren, luv, princess, I know you can hear me.”

He’s trying to “this isn’t you” her into recognizing him

“Kiss me,” I whisper. “Lay with me. I want to feel you from the inside.”

does she have a vagina if she has a tail 🤨

“You’re beautiful, Maren,” he says to me, leaning in to give me a deep, fin-curling kiss.

FIN CURLING LMAO

So I reach down and his gaze is glued to my hand as it slides over my torso and down over the start of my tail until I’m a quarter of the way down, at more or less the same place where my legs would come together. Slowly I slide my finger along the scales, parting them, the sensation already slippery and then my finger dips down inside to where I’m hot and slick.

SCREECHING

“I’m not sure if that’s my side anymore,” I tell her. “I’m no longer part of their crew, if that wasn’t obvious.” I gesture down to my tail. “I’m no longer a part of their world.”

wish I could beeeeeeee part of your world

“Please,” he begs Maren as she stares down at him with icy contempt. God Almighty, does she ever look like a queen. “Please let me go. Let me reason with you, mermaid.” She doesn’t say anything and he whimpers like the pitiful fool he is while all of us Brethren watch on with bated breath. Vengeance has never tasted so sweet.

EAT HIS HEART QUEEN NOM NOM NOM

You’re a pathetic, lily-livered coward,

lily-livered feels like a slur what

I dive deep and the moment I do so I feel a current of electricity around my body. My gills start to work again, rising from my neck and when I look down at my legs, I watch as they fuse together, turning into a tail. Into my tail.

she’s so h2o just add water coded