Nocticadia

by Keri Lake

“Because they’re cheaper than human beings, and it’s not considered murder when they die.”

“I’ve a reputation as Doctor Death. Seems most would be frightened of me.” “I suppose. Though, I don’t find you all that frightening. Grouchy, but not frightening.”

“My grouchy nature serves a purpose, Miss Vespertine. Unfortunately, you seem to have some inexplicable resistance.”

“And so the moth befriended the flame.”

“I didn’t think the flame was capable of being friendly.” “You assume I’m the danger to you.”

“Is it wrong that I’m insulted by that?” I let out a laugh and turned to see a smile stretch his lips. A true and genuine smile, and holy shit, it was the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen. Straight, white teeth, and a dimple in his cheek.

“Voneric’s Disease. A rare congenital disorder. Happy?” “An autoimmune disease.”

“Here, I thought you liked studying moths, the way you carry on in your lectures.” “Depends on the moth I’m studying.”

So fucking wet, I imagined Professor Bramwell whispering in my ear. In my mind’s eye, he was bent over me, the muscles of his bare chest pressed against my back, while he ran his fingers over that excited bundle of nerves that practically purred against his fingertips.

Be a good little moth, and I’ll fuck you hard.

Please fuck me, my mind begged, still caught up in the fantasy of being bent over his desk. Please, Professor Bramwell. Fuck me hard.

I liked that he was older. More mature. I’d always been attracted to older men.

“Bane.” “What are you, a DC fan, or something?” “No. I’m simply not a fan of curious cats that like to invade my workspace.”

“So, names. I think the one in the back with the white spot on its wing should be Achilles, and the one in the front, with the goofy proboscis, should be Patroclus.”

“Is this an obsession with Greek mythology?” “In your canonical world, I suppose it would seem that way.”

“A romance novel I read a while back.” He let out a disapproving sigh. “I’m sure it was enriching.” “You shouldn’t knock romance, Professor. It so happens that love is biologically important to human beings. It reduces blood pressure and depression, and improves sleep.”

“And just how does that benefit you as a reader? A voyeur, essentially. You have no intimate connection with these fictional characters.” “Says who? I happen to get very attached to my fictional boyfriends.” Yet another frown. “Boyfriends?” “I read a lot.”

“You’ve never touched the sea?” “I was always scared of it. The vastness. The power. The way it could sweep a person off their feet and carry them miles away from shore. Then you’re alone and adrift in the middle of nowhere. With God knows what swimming beneath you.”

“Deep waters terrify me.” “Or perhaps it’s the sea who fears the depths of you, Miss Vespertine.”

“I feel compelled to do something meaningful with my life. I owe it to my family.” “You owe nothing to your family,”

“Passions are useless, if we pursue them for others. They become obligations. Undesirable.” “This project is your passion.” “I suppose. In spite of all the political bullshit.”

“What’s y...

“I don’t know. I guess I’m still searching for it. I love science. I love learning. And I want to cure Noctisoma someday. Put you out of business.”

“To answer your question about why I didn’t leave you in the gardens that night, I find you to be an intriguing annoyance.”

“Hardly. I don’t have a defined type, particularly when it comes to my students.” “She’ll be thoroughly disappointed, I’m sure.”

“Under different circumstances, she might’ve been the perfect match.”

“Under different circumstances …” The pause in his words carried a laborious heartbeat that smothered my own, as I watched the slightest smile play on his lips. A ...

“And I might’ve let you.”

“Goodnight, Professor.” “Good night, Miss Vespertine.”

“I can’t.” “Tell me. Now.”

People with money somehow always pissed me off, and I hated myself for that, but goddamn it, sometimes they acted like their problems were on par with everyone else’s.

“No. That you bother to compare yourself to them at all is ridiculous.” “Ah, yes. I almost forgot they were in a different league. Thank you for yanking me back down to reality.”

“Perhaps Gilchrist was right when she said the underprivileged aren’t meant for a proud and dignified institution like Dracadia.”

“Because you’re better than them. Stronger. And unfortunately, you’ll have to fight harder for what you want. But you have an understanding of things beyond their comprehension. You’re exceptional, Lilia. And by God, if you waste that intellect on the ignorant words of an envious shrew like Loretta Gilchrist, it will be the most egregious offense you’ve ever committed.”

I opened it to find a small plastic card with the Dragon’s Lair coffee shop logo on it. The attached paper simply said: Now you can buy coffee whenever you like. –B

“Oh, fuck, Lilia. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I feel you.”

“I feel everything.”

“I fucking feel everything!”

“Forgive me. You’re the first thing I’ve felt in a long time.”

“What was the last thing you remember feeling?” Pain flashed over his face. “My brother’s hand, just before he was taken away and killed.” “Oh, God. I’m so sorry.”

“You feel good.” My nerves caught in my throat as I said, “You do, too.”

Before I could gauge his next move, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. All sound faded. The world around us disappeared. The kiss began slow, a mere sampling, as he brushed his lips over mine. He grabbed either side of my face, pulling me closer, fully committing to the kiss, and a tingling deluge of excitement scattered across my skin.

Some kisses were said to feel like fireworks. His felt like a slow-drip anesthetic, silently siphoning my senses, until all I could smell, taste, and feel was him.

I’d never been kissed by a man. Boys, yes. But never a man.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking.” “It’s okay.” “No. No, it’s not okay.” He released me and stepped back. “I can’t fuck this up. Not now.”

“Perhaps I manifested that kiss.”

“Now, why would you do that?”

“You’ll have to haul my dead rotting corpse there.” “I’m quite familiar with the task.”

“Don’t ever feel ashamed of being ruthless in the pursuit of what you want, Lilia. The path to success is rarely a virtuous one.”