The Antipope

by Robert Rankin

There was a lot of joy to be had in the contemplation of a pint glass; in terms of plain reality of course, there was a deal more to be had in the draining of one.

‘Eggs too have their strong points, but naught can in any way equal for vitamins, carbohydrates or pure nutritional value God’s chosen food, the spud.’ Pooley made a nasty face. ‘Even a sprout I would prefer.’ ‘Careful there,’ said Omally, ‘I will have none of that language here.’

‘Have you any more of that potato gin?’ he asked. ‘Only if I am going to die, I should prefer to die as I have lived, drunkenly.’