To Kill a Shadow (Mistlands, #1)

by Katherine Quinn

To all those who have known the weight of darkness and still shine. You’re stronger than you know.

Do not fear the dark It was where we were born And it is where we all shall die

I couldn’t help but admit that the commander’s domineering presence could be felt from a distance. Boldly, I drank him in. He exposed no discernible features, his body and face encased entirely in thin onyx metal. All of them wore armor, but the commander’s was covered in obsidian spikes, the tips glimmering in the erratic lighting of the torches that lined the square. A wave of ice weighed my bones, slinking around my thudding heart and squeezing. I shivered as phantom fingers traced down my spine, the mountain breeze tickling my ears like a whispered caress.

Beware the black heart. For it stings, stings, stings when kissed by a lover’s blade.

A death so slow, lips so sweet. One taste, and a thousand deaths you shall receive.

Kiara shifted in place, but her stare turned cold. Deadly. I smiled, unexpected pride filling me.

Ducking and swerving around the towering Knight, Kiara swiveled around to his back, serving him with a forceful punch to the ribs. For the first time since I’d known him, Harlow looked surprised. His shock didn’t last long. Spinning around, he slammed his fist into Kiara’s jaw, the force of it knocking her sideways. A growl left me, but I forced myself to stay in the shadows. The sight of her bleeding face caused phantom flames to ignite within me, my very blood boiling. My nails dug into my palms as she righted herself, wiping the red from her still smiling mouth.

So far, the girl appears strong. Maddox chose her, just as you suspected he would. Letter from Lieutenant Harlow to King Cirian, year 50 of the curse

She made your heart pound for the first time in years.

“He smiles,” I teased, knowing I was poking the beast. I didn’t care. “And here I thought you would crack if you smiled. Shame.” Jude caught his breath, eyeing me from beneath thick lashes. “You’d have liked that, wouldn’t you?”

Instead, I grinned wide and said, “I’m elated to see you’re not the misogynist pig I pegged you as.” “I’m not a—” He stopped when he glimpsed the smile on my lips. “Oh. Another joke?”

My mother had given me that book. It was one of two things I had of hers, and I’d been so pissed at her for abandoning me as a child that I’d shoved her book into the shared library. No one ever read it; if it didn’t contain stories of war or the “art” of battle, not many of the Knights would touch it. And of course, it had been the first book Kiara had selected.

When I had heard Kiara’s muffled screams from behind the door, I’d sprinted without thought, only to come upon that spineless bastard beating her senseless. Something had snapped inside me, and it had taken everything not to deliver the blow that would ensure he never opened his eyes again. I’d wanted to murder him, wanted to—

Kiara and how soft her skin had felt beneath my calloused fingers died away, replaced by the numbness I’d grown all too accustomed to. It flooded into my chest like poison, wiping away any of the warmth I’d felt back there in the library.

I spotted a pair of small feet poking out from beneath the covers, a child-sized lump positioned at the bottom of the bed. Shit. Landon had one son. He’d never remarried after his wife died, despite being nearly as rich as the king himself and the subject of many of the court ladies’ attentions. I paused, my hand beginning to tremble. If the child woke— No. I’d told Cirian long ago that I drew the line at harming children, but even if he didn’t wake during the act, the bustling of the new morning would rouse him eventually, and he would forever be traumatized by the memory of waking up in a bed full of blood.

He suspects nothing, though I can see the connection between them grow. Wait for my orders. Letter sent from Sciona via messenger to unknown recipient

“Because you’re a mystery and, quite frankly, intimidating. Maybe it’s the whole leather-gloved-always-scowling thing you got going on”—his eyes flickered to my hands—“but

Its giving Kaz Brekker.

Before I could turn around for the hallway, the doors thudded closed, a bolt sliding into place. Not a hint of light filtered beneath the thick door. “That’s not ominous or anything.” “Shhh, Jake,”

“Everyone, form a chain and hold hands so we don’t lose one another,” I instructed, leaving no room for defiance. “Aww, we’re already holding hands,” a new voice snickered to my right. “Shut up, Nic,” Jake snapped, though there was no bite to his tone.

I can see in the dark.

A jerk on my hand sent me stumbling, swaying from side to side, my knees bending as my balance became nothing but a dream. There was a loud splash, the sound of a body striking the roaring waters, a cry, shrill and garbled. Someone had fallen in.

The commander is hesitant when it comes to the girl. I fear his attachment might become a problem. Letter from Lieutenant Harlow to King Cirian, year 50 of the curse

Jude lifted his hand as if to touch my cheek, but likely thought better of it, lowering it to his side and balling it into a tight fist. He gave me one final lingering look before abandoning me in the hall.

She is what we’ve suspected. A little nudging on my part, and the commander will select her all on his own. No one will be the wiser. Letter from unknown sender to King Cirian, year 50 of the curse

I watched every step she took, knowing full well I’d done nothing but poke at the beast lurking within. But my beast matched hers, and we’d only tear one another to pieces in the end.

I lost all rational thought around her. Since the beginning, before she’d even known I was her commander, it had been easy to talk with her, but now… Now, with her under me, it was a damned miracle I could form any coherent thought at all.

I lowered my mouth to her ear, her hair tickling my cheek. “I’d imagine you would rather enjoy that. Perhaps too much.” I had just raised my head when she struck. Her lips captured mine, the force of her kiss catching me off guard.

This time, when my world tilted, it wasn’t because of her kiss. Before I even knew what had happened, I was flung onto my back…into the same position I’d had her in moments before. Cold steel pressed against my throat.

I thought back to her kiss. Such a dirty trick—one I wouldn’t mind being deceived with again.

“So, we’re back to ‘recruit’? What happened to ‘Kiara’? Which, by the way, I hate. Usually my friends call me—” “Ki. Yes, I’m aware,” I interrupted. “But I would hardly call myself your friend.” Not after the heat I’d felt between us. I was still burning. Besides, I didn’t want to be her friend. I wanted— I didn’t know what I wanted. Or maybe I did, and that was the problem.

“Whatever I am, you are Kiara to me,”

“Don’t overthink everything. You might be surprised by how much you’d like being out of control. Being alive is chaos, and living in it is half the fun.”

I’d learned that day that sometimes we have to give away pieces of ourselves to others we love, even if it hurts at the time. Without sacrificing those parts, nothing new—and possibly wonderful—could grow in their stead.

Love was nothing if not sacrifice, and for him, I’d willingly give all of myself.

I’d killed and tortured men, had their blood paint my face and hands. I could ignore their desperate begging, turn off my emotions as they screamed for the pain to end. For me to end it. But one spirited girl could send me to my knees.

“You are what I imagine the sun to be like,” I whispered so softly I wasn’t sure she could hear the admission. “Fiery. Beautiful. Damning.”

“I wish you’d never come…because now I might have to watch you die. And that, I would regret for the rest of my days. However many I have left.”

“It’s a wonder you can walk with that inflated ego of yours.” “And it’s a miracle you can walk at all with that giant chip on your shoulder.” My mouth gaped. This girl was going to be the death of me.

He choked on it, a sickening gurgling sound escaping his red lips. Within seconds, the noise stopped, and Nic was no longer choking on his blood. He was dead.

The mind can be the sharpest weapon one possesses, but it can also be the blade that delivers the fatal blow.

Just when I thought this world to be cruel, it went ahead and proved it could get so much worse. And now I had to dig a hole for a boy who would never see the sun we fought to restore.

Memories flashed across my mind and my chest squeezed. I felt like I was drowning, weights tied to my ankles, the surface too far away.

With a final, lingering glance, I released her waist and gently nudged her forward. She followed my lead and stood, though she did so awkwardly. Suddenly I was cold all over, and not just because I didn’t have a body pressed against mine.

Jude indulged my hunger-induced whining, occasionally sprinkling in an “uh-huh” or “I see” now and again. I didn’t think he was listening. When I questioned his navigating abilities, he raised his dark brows in affront, awarding me an icy look that stopped me dead in my tracks. He then proceeded to enlighten me on his expertise in that particular area—how he was such a skilled hunter and tracker—and this was when I inserted my own “uh-huhs” and “I sees.”

Courage is unlocking the door to your cage and taking flight. True bravery is burning the cage to the ground.

In the span of an enraged heartbeat, I lost all sense of sanity. There was the ash and the clouds of cold blue. And then there was a vengeful darkness.

“Kiara.” A voice wafted from above, growing more urgent. Desperate. “Wake up, dammit!” “Kiara, if you wake up right this second, I’ll tell you about my scars. I’ll tell you anything you want to know! I’ll give you all my secrets.” Jude. “I know you want to know. I can always see the questions in your eyes.” A choked growl rumbled in his chest. “Just wake up and open that cheeky mouth of yours. Insult me! Just say something,” he added with an uncharacteristic whine.

The heart is the wickedest of beasts, for it can never be tamed.

“Jude?” “Yes, recruit?” I felt him smile against my skin. “Thank you for sharing your story with me,” I said softly. “And thank you for…” I couldn’t say the words, but I didn’t need to. Jude stilled for a moment, and then he reached for my hand. He placed it on his heart. “Never thank me for that, Kiara,” he rasped. A mischievous glint entered his right eye. “Not when there are other things I’d prefer you thank me for.” I gently jabbed him in the ribs. “Commander!” I said in mock disbelief. “And here I thought your ego was already large enough.”

“Who are you, and what have you done with my brooding commander?” A man whose smile never had reached his eyes until recently. “You’ve thoroughly ruined him.” “Good,” I said, suddenly feeling breathless. “I like you ruined for me.”