Hot Mess Summer

by Melissa Foster

She was my secret keeper. When things got to be too much, she was the one I turned to. She would tough-love me and straighten my ass out. She wasn’t able to do that when I got out of the military, but she was the only one who saw all the reasons I was so messed up. While everyone else was telling me to put what I’d experienced in the military behind me and move on, she was trying to get me to talk about Neil, which I couldn’t do. She knew before I did that being home to stay, without the brother I’d made all sorts of future plans with, was too much for me to bear. She knew before I did that it was easier for me to distance myself from the reality of Neil being gone when I was away. Once I was back in our old stomping grounds, she saw that I was grieving for what was really the first time on top of the PTSD I had from the military. I never told her about the night I thought Ethan was Neil, but we talked about everything else, including the fact that I thought I’d made a mistake marrying Lindsay, but I’d taken a vow and I was going to stick to it. Needless to say, when she died, it hit me hard.”