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by
Dave Harvey
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April 2 - June 25, 2025
the drama of sin and grace.
By denying our sin, we devalue grace.
I am my biggest marital problem
Jesus is the only solution.
Have you ever been so devoted to your way that it makes you, well . . . stupid?
the greatest benefit of acknowledging our sinfulness is that it makes Christ and his work precious to us.
We must not ignore our sin, because it is the very context where the gospel shines brightest.
to get to the heart of marriage, we must deal with the heart of sin.
Until we understand the problem, we will not be able to delight in the solution. Grace is truly amazing because of what we were saved from.
The very sin that you fear seeing is the very reason why Christ died in your place.
What we believe about God determines the quality of our marriage.
What a person believes about God determines what he or she thinks about how we got here, what our ultimate meaning is, and what happens after we die.
Your theology governs your entire life. And it determines how you live in your marriage.
It’s a wonderful, freeing thing to realize that the durability and quality of your marriage is not ultimately based on the strength of your commitment to your marriage. Rather, it’s based on something completely apart from your marriage: God’s truth; truth we find plain and clear on the pages of Scripture.
The Bible is the foundation for a thriving marriage.
Everything in Scripture is either preparation for the gospel, presentation of the gospel, or participation in the gospel.
sin has separated us from God and from each other.
Without the cross we are at war with God, and he is at war with us.
Accurately understanding and continually applying the gospel is the Christian life.
Marriage was not just invented by God, it belongs to God. He has a unique claim over its design, purpose, and goals. It actually exists for him more than it exists for you and me and our spouses.
God is the most important person in a marriage. Marriage is for our good, but it is first for God’s glory.
The focus of a thriving marriage is the glory of God.
What if you saw your problems as they truly are: caused by a war within your own heart?
“Till sin be bitter, Christ will not be sweet.” He means that until we truly understand the problem, we won’t savor the solution.
I treated someone I love as if I had no love at all.
his focus is not primarily outward. It’s inward.
his own sinfulness caused him to magnify the glory of the Savior!
A great awareness of one’s sinfulness often stands side by side with great joy and confidence in God.
we have been redeemed by grace through the death and resurrection of Christ. Our Savior has come to rescue us from the penalty of sin and grant us an abundant life by his Spirit.
Until sin be bitter, marriage may not be sweet.
many Christians are explicitly denying that their own sin can be the cause of their personal anguish.
This ongoing need for the Savior is exactly what professing Christians must hang on to.
Without the gospel of our crucified and risen Savior our marriages slide toward the superficial.
once I know that I am indeed the worst of sinners, then my spouse is no longer my biggest problem: I am.
The big deal is that my sin is not first against me or my marriage. All sin is first against God.
the term “sinner,” when used in Scripture, clearly implies there is one (at least one) who is sinned against.
Sin is always aimed first and foremost at God
“There can be no small sins against a great God.”
I am a better husband and father, and a happier man, when I recognize myself as the worst of sinners.
we are treasured children of the Father, who loved us enough to send his only Son to suffer the punishment for our sins, even those sins we have yet to commit.
We are all the worst of sinners, so anything we do that isn’t sin is simply the grace of God at work.
There’s nothing quite like being a forgiven sinner, grateful to the living God for life, breath, salvation, and every other provision.
You can’t be close to it and safe from it at the same time.
When war enters the scene, everything it touches becomes a battlefield.
The nature of sin, you see, is war.
freedom in Christ and because of Christ.
How easy it is to use the phrase, “We’re having marriage problems,” as if the marriage created them.
The cause of our marriage battles, friends, is neither our marriage nor our spouse. It’s the sin in our hearts—entirely, totally, exclusively, without exception.
What’s the greatest problem in my marriage? I am.
All sin does damage, which can be complex and long-lasting. We really do reap what we sow, and our battles have actual consequences. They are not war-games, but war itself.