Now emotions felt vivid—whether painful or enjoyable, I didn’t care—and I felt alive experiencing a range of them. I felt alive when I was happy. I felt alive when I was sad. I felt alive when I was calm. I started to experience what I’d read about in my meditation books—a kind of happiness that is all encompassing and includes hard feelings. It’s not the kind of happiness we read about in fairy tales. This kind of happiness was rooted in my unconditional willingness to be present when I felt something. It wasn’t easy, but the work of it felt good. This is not to say I’ve reached a magical
...more
