There Is Room for All of You Here

by Michaela Angemeer

do we accept the love we think we deserve or do we accept the love we were taught we deserved

she never saw me whole but she knew how to love something that needed fixing

check engine light on permanently inside my body

why do i have to make my anger agreeable like i'm not allowed to be mad unless i immediately tie it up in a bow

everyone keeps reinforcing my belief that people are unreliable can’t someone be consistent for once can’t one person stick to their word not make me second guess or double check i’m not asking for much just don’t say you’ll be there if you have no plan to

date yourself. affirm yourself the way you would want a partner to. hug yourself when you cry. listen to yourself. ask the questions you’re afraid to answer. reassure yourself. trust yourself. plan solo trips and go on them. celebrate friendships and chosen family more than you ever have. buy yourself a birthday present for the first time. flowers for no reason. romanticize everything you do by yourself. teach yourself how you want to be loved, and how deserving you are of it.

i hope you know that being open to love again after giving up on it is one of the greatest acts of bravery. even though you’re terrified, you are so courageous. i know vulnerability feels like prying your chest open with scarred palms, but what if it’s worth it? what if you find someone just as soft as you. what if you find someone who knows you don’t deserve to be discarded. what if being seen becomes effortless. what if feeling doesn’t have to hurt. what if they make everything you’ve been through worth it. what if they teach you how to love again.

when it was cloudy for six days straight you were the sun

it's already hard for me to feel like myself when you're not with me

i didn’t know you existed six weeks ago but now you’re making me pancakes kissing my forehead buying me flowers calling me honey singing my favourite songs if you keep this up i might start to think that being with you is better than being solo

to the love of my life: thank you for bringing joy into every day. your laugh and boundless energy makes my life so much better. i love learning and growing with you. and that every day is its own little adventure. i am so grateful for your deep caring and understanding. i just wanna get to know you until the end of the earth. thank you for never failing to surprise me in the most beautiful ways that make me feel more loved than i’ve ever felt. your presence is a gift. your mind is a wonder that unravels in the most profound ways. i just want to live inside your brain. you bring depth to the moments that need quiet and light to the moments that deserve celebration. i love that you lead with love and are so aware of the impact you have on other people. i am so honoured to call you my partner and best friend. the idea of our life together is the most exciting thing i’ve ever imagined.

you deserve a count on me love. a coffee in the morning love. a makes you playlists kind of love. a play with your hair while you fall asleep kind of love. a call into work cause they don’t want to leave you kind of love. a stay in bed all day kind of love. a spontaneous gift cause it reminds them of you kind of love. a smiles at you for no reason kind of love. a bring you cookies when you have cramps kind of love. an understanding love. a love that wants to grow with you. a love that sees your unwashed hair, your crusty morning eyes, your overthinking, a love that loves you even more because of it. you deserve an unconditional love. a love that makes you feel safe.

And you will settle for NOTHING less 🫶🏻

the truth is for you there’s nothing i wouldn’t do