Too Late

by Colleen Hoover

I cried because I realized that no matter who he’s become, a part of me still has empathy for him… because I don’t know how not to.

Every second I spend with him just makes two more seconds I want to spend with him.

He’s everything I want, and everything I don’t need, and it literally, physically hurts.

Damn him for being everything I wish Asa was, and everything I wish I could have.

I read once that the difference between an extrovert and an introvert isn’t how you act in a group setting. It’s whether or not those group settings give you fuel or drain you. An introvert can outwardly appear to others to be an extrovert, and vice versa. But it all comes down to how those interactions influence you internally. I am definitely an introvert, because people drain me. And now I need silence to refuel.

but the only thing love relies on for survival is respect. And you don’t get that from him.”

“You are everything Asa doesn’t deserve.” And everything I want, I think.

That’s all those were. Words. A few simple words strung together, but they held just enough power to physically stop me in my tracks.

“I want everything about you. So goddamn much. To the point that it’s blinding me.”

“If I come to your house tonight, I’m not even going to look in your direction,” he says. “But know that you’re all I see. You’re all I fucking see, Sloan.”

“Love finds you in the forgiveness at the tail end of a fight. Love finds you in the empathy you feel for someone else. Love finds you in the embrace that follows a tragedy. Love finds you in the celebration after the conquering of an illness. Love finds you in the devastation after the surrender to an illness.”

Love finds you in the tragedies. That’s certainly where Carter found me. In the midst of a series of tragedies…

“You’re all I see, Sloan. Beyond the job, beyond right and wrong. You’re all I see.”

Sometimes a person’s journey from first breath to death isn’t always part of a master plan. Sometimes the only thing that separates your final breath from your death is a mere six centimeters.

Love shouldn’t feel like added weight. It should make you feel as light as air. Asa made everything in my life heavy. Luke makes me feel like I’m floating. I guess that’s the difference between being loved the right way and the wrong way. You either feel tethered to an anchor… or you feel like you’re flying.

“I’m in love with you, Sloan. Madly in love with you. And this baby growing inside of you is half you. Do you know how lucky I would feel if you allowed me to love something that was a part of you?” I lower my palm to her stomach and rest it there. “This baby is mine, Sloan. It’s yours. It’s ours. And if your decision is to raise this baby, then I’m going to be the best damn father that ever walked the earth. I promise.”

It doesn’t matter how the members of my family came to be. What matters is that this is my family. We’re a family. Me and her and our son.