The Golden Lily (Bloodlines, #2)

by Richelle Mead

Day 24. Situation is growing worse. My captors continue to find new and horrific ways to torture me. When not working, Agent Scarlet spends her days examining fabric swatches for bridesmaid dresses and going on about how in love she is. This usually causes Agent Boring Borscht to regale us with stories of Russian weddings that are even more boring than his usual ones. My attempts at escape have been thwarted thus far. Also, I am out of cigarettes. Any assistance or tobacco products you can send will be greatly appreciated. —Prisoner 24601

Glancing over at Trey, I was surprised to find him staring at her retreating figure intently. I nudged him. “Hey. Don’t forget to put your name on this, or it was all for nothing.” It still took him several seconds to drag his gaze away. “That’s your sister, isn’t it?” His dismal tone made it sound more like a statement than a question, as though he were revealing some unfortunate fact. “Um, yeah. You’ve seen her like a hundred times. She’s gone to this school for a month.” He frowned. “I just never thought much about it… never got a good look at her before. I don’t have any classes with her.” “She was front and center in that fashion show.” “She had a mask on.” His dark eyes studied me. “You guys don’t look alike at all.” “We get that a lot.” Trey still looked troubled, and I had no idea why. “You’re smart to keep her out of modeling,” he said at last. “She’s too young.” “It’s a religious thing,” I said, knowing Trey wouldn’t quiz me for many details on our “faith.” “Whatever it is, keep her out of the public eye.” He scrawled his name on the lab and shut his textbook. “You don’t want her plastered all over magazines or something. Lots of creepy people out there.”

You don’t have to help, an inner voice warned me. You don’t owe him anything. You don’t owe any Moroi anything that isn’t absolutely necessary. Have you forgotten Keith? This isn’t a part of your job. The bunker came back to me, and I recalled how one vampire deal had landed Keith in Re-education. How much worse was I? Social interaction was an inevitable part of this assignment, but I was blurring all the lines around it again. “Okay,” I said. “I’ll do it. E-mail me what time you need to leave.”

That it was me and a roomful of vampires and dhampirs. Unnatural creatures. Unnatural creatures who wanted my blood… Dimitri studied me curiously. “It won’t hurt, if that’s what you’re afraid of. We don’t need any more than what a doctor would take.” I shook my head adamantly. “No.” “Both Sonya and I have training in this sort of thing,” he added, trying to reassure me. “You don’t have to worry about—” “She said no, okay?” All the eyes that had been on me suddenly jerked toward Adrian. He leaned forward, fixing his gaze on Sonya and Dimitri, and I saw something in those pretty eyes I’d never seen before: anger. They were like emerald fire. “How many times does she have to refuse?” Adrian demanded. “If she doesn’t want to, then that’s all there is to it. This has nothing to do with her. This is our science project. She’s here to protect Jill and has plenty to do there. So stop harassing her already!” “‘Harassing’ is kind of a strong word,” Dimitri said, calm in the face of Adrian’s outburst. “Not when you keep pushing someone who wants to be left alone,” countered Adrian. He shot me a concerned look before fixing his anger back on Sonya and Dimitri. “Stop ganging up on her.” Sonya glanced uncertainly between us. She looked legitimately hurt. As astute as she was, I don’t think she’d realized how much this bothered me. “Adrian… Sydney… we aren’t trying to upset anyone. We just really want to get to the bottom of this. I thought all of you did too. Sydney’s always been so sup...

I worked hard to calm down, reassuring myself that the conversation was done, that Sonya and Dimitri weren’t going to interrogate me or forcibly drain my blood. I dared a peek at Adrian. He no longer looked angry, but there was still a fierceness there. It was almost… protective. A strange, warm feeling swirled in my chest, and for a brief moment, when I looked at him, I saw… safety. That wasn’t usually the first sentiment I had around him. I shot him what I hoped was a grateful look. He gave me a small nod in return. He knows, I realized. He knows how I feel about vampires. Of course, everyone knew. Alchemists made no secret about how we believed most vampires and dhampirs were dark creatures who had no business interacting with humans. Because I was with them so often, however, I didn’t think my cohort here in Palm Springs really understood how deeply that belief ran. They understood it in theory but didn’t really feel it. They had no reason to since they hardly ever saw any evidence of it in me. But Adrian understood.

Jill, sitting beside me in the passenger seat, had been quiet thus far. With the bond, she might know the answer. “No,” she said, a puzzled note in her voice. “He would have done it for you regardless.”

“Sage won’t eat any of that.” This really would be easier, I decided, if they’d both just pretend I didn’t exist. “Why ever not?” asked Nathan, looking at me curiously. “Are you allergic to seafood?” “She only eats healthy stuff,” said Adrian. “Everything you just got is dripping in fat.”

“It’d be interesting to get Strigoi blood and see if anything happened when I applied spirit,” she was saying. “Do you think you could manage that?” “Gladly,” said Dimitri.

“There has been a bit of a culture shock,” I admitted, unsure as to why I was defending Angeline. “And those guys today… I mean, if they’d tried to get me to join their sing-along, I probably would’ve punched them too.” “Unacceptable,” said Dimitri. He used to be a combat instructor, and I could understand why. “She’s here on a mission. What she did was reckless and irresponsible.” Sonya gave him a sly smile. “And here I thought you had a soft spot for reckless young girls.” “Rose never would have done anything like that,” he countered. He paused to reconsider, and I could’ve sworn there was the hint of a smile there. “Well, at least not in such a public setting.”

We had just paid the check when Dimitri’s cell phone rang. “Hello?” he answered. And like that, his face transformed. That fierceness I so associated with him softened, and he practically glowed. “No, no. It’s always a good time for you to call, Roza.” Whatever the response on the other end was, it made him smile.

“Ah, those two. In a fight, they’re lethal. Around each other, they melt.”

And would you believe that what worried Adrian the most was that I would think less of him?” “Actually,” said Sonya softly, “I can very much believe that.”

He had been staring at the cross, but now he lifted his gaze to meet mine. Some emotion I couldn’t quite read played over his features. It was almost like he’d just discovered something, something troubling to him. He took a deep breath and, his hand still holding mine, pulled me toward him. His green eyes were dark in the candlelight but somehow just as enthralling. His fingers tightened on mine, and I felt warmth spread throughout me. “Sage—” The power suddenly came back on, flooding the room with light. Apparently, with no concern for electrical bills, he’d left all the lights on when he went out earlier. The spell was broken, and both of us winced at the sudden brightness. Adrian sprang back from me, leaving the cross in my hand. “Don’t you have a dance or a curfew or something?” he asked abruptly, not looking at me. “I don’t want to keep you. Hell, I shouldn’t have bothered you at all. Sorry. I assume that was Aiden texting you?”

‘You are the most beautiful creature I have ever seen walking this earth.’” My breath caught, both at the words and the way he said them. I felt strange inside. I didn’t know what to think, except that I needed to get out of there, away from Adrian, away from what I didn’t understand. I broke from him and was surprised to find myself shaking. “You’re still drunk,” I said, putting my hand on the door knob. He tilted his head to the side, still watching me in that same, disconcerting way. “Some things are true, drunk or sober. You should know that. You deal in facts all the time.” “Yeah, but this isn’t—” I couldn’t argue with him looking at me like that. “I have to go. Wait… you didn’t take the cross.” I held it out to him. He shook his head. “Keep it. I think I’ve got something else to help center my life.”

“Why on earth would you buy a car like this if you can’t drive a stick? There are dozens of cars—new cars—that have automatic transmission. It’d be a million times easier.” Adrian shrugged. “I like the color. It matches my living room.” Eddie snorted. “But you can’t drive it,” I pointed out. “I figure it can’t be that hard.” Adrian sounded remarkably unconcerned about what I found blasphemous. “I’ll just practice taking it around the block a few times and figure it out.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “What? Are you out of your mind? You’ll ruin it if you don’t know what you’re doing!” “What else am I supposed to do?” he asked. “Are you going to teach me?” I turned back to the beautiful Mustang. “Yes,” I said adamantly. “If that’s what it takes to save it from you.”

Sonya gave him a long, level look. “I think you’re letting your personal feelings interfere with this. Your emotions are going to ruin our research.”

Jill had her chin propped in her hand and was gazing at me with the weirdest look. It was almost… dreamy. It took her a few moments to snap out of her daze and respond. The dreamy look became embarrassed and then dismayed. She glanced down at her book. “Sorry. I was just thinking how good you look in taupe. What did you ask?”

“No, he really did,” she assured me. A dopey smile crossed her features. “He loves that you love the car more than he does and thinks it’s awesome you’re getting so good in your defense class. Not that that’s a surprise. You’re always so good at everything, and you don’t even realize it. You don’t even realize half the things you do—like how you watch out for others and never even think about yourself.”

If I could do those things, then I’d truly be a good Alchemist. And, I realized, I’d also be terribly, awfully lonely.

“Thank you for the poolside outing,” I said. “Your near-sun-stroke aside, that was pretty amazing.” He gave me a cocky smile. “Maybe you’ll get used to vampire magic after all.” “No,” I said automatically. “I’ll never get used to that.” His smile immediately disappeared. “Of course not,” he murmured. “See you around.”

“Yes… but not what you’re thinking.” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. No, no, no. The thought in my head was crazy. I had no business even considering it. Dimitri had the right idea. We needed to focus on normal, concrete methods of locating Sonya.

You need me? You yell. You want to leave? We go. I’ll get you out of here, no matter what.” Something clenched in my chest, and for a moment, the whole world narrowed down to the green of his eyes. “Thank you.”

Adrian was right that the sun I’d just described wasn’t the design that had been on the sword or brochure. Both of those had used the ancient symbol. The one in my vision was a more modern adaptation—and this wasn’t the first time I’d seen it. The sun in my vision was an exact match for Trey’s tattoo.

I turned back to Adrian. “I’d take the vampires. Loyalty to one’s kind can only go so far.” Something in Adrian’s face transformed, but I hardly paid it any attention. I was too struck by the realization that the words I’d just uttered were akin to high treason in the Alchemists.

I lingered a few moments more, safe in the circle we made, and then reluctantly slipped away.

“Easy there, Sage. I’m no gun-toting crazy guy. Crazy, yes. But not the rest.” I stared in disbelief, not that I could really make out much of the tall, dark figure standing over me. “Adrian?” The height was right, as was the build. As I stared, I became more and more certain. His hands steadied my shaking. I was so glad to see a friendly face—to see him—that I nearly sank into his arms in relief. “It is you. How’d you find me?” “You’re the only human out here with a yellow and purple aura,” he said. “Makes you easy to spot.”

“Good,” I said. “Now just reverse what you did before, one hand down in front of the—” Something slipped, either his hand or foot, and Adrian plummeted to the ground. It wasn’t that long of a drop, and his height helped a little—not that he was in any shape to actually use his legs and land on his feet. I winced. “Or you can just take the short way down,” I said.

“You’re in an awfully good mood,” he observed. “Was there a sale at Khakis-R-Us?”

He fixed me with a disconcertingly hard look. “Maybe everyone else thinks your aversion to food is cute—but not me. I’ve watched you watch Jill. Here’s some tough love: you will never, ever have her body. Ever. It’s impossible. She’s Moroi. You’re human. That’s biology. You have a great one, one that most humans would kill for—and you’d look even better if you put on a little weight. Five pounds would be a good start. Hide the ribs. Get a bigger bra size.”

“I’m right, aren’t I?” I pushed. “You’ve been driving one your whole life!” “Not even Moroi give licenses to infants, Sage,” he said wryly. “Don’t dodge this. You know what I mean. You’ve known how to drive stick for years.” His silence answered for him, telling me I was right, even if his face was hard to read. “Why?” I demanded. Now I was nearly pleading. Everyone said I was so exceptionally smart, I could string random things together and make remarkable conclusions. But this was beyond me, and I couldn’t handle something that made so little sense. “Why would you do that? Why would you act like you didn’t know how to drive?” A million thoughts seemed to cross his mind, none of which he wanted to share. At last, he shook his head in exasperation. “Isn’t it obvious, Sage? No, of course it isn’t. I did it so I’d have a reason to be around you—one I knew you couldn’t refuse.” I was more confused than ever. “But… why? Why would you want to do that?” “Why?” he asked. “Because it was the closest I could get to doing this.” He reached out and pulled me to him, one hand on my waist and the other behind my neck. He tipped my head up and lowered his lips to mine. I closed my eyes and melted as my whole body was consumed in that kiss. I was nothing. I was everything. Chills ran over my skin, and fire burned inside me. His body pressed closer to mine, and I wrapped my arms around his neck. His lips were warmer and softer than anything I could have ever imagined, yet fierce and power...

“No. No. Don’t get any closer! You can’t do that again. Do you understand? We can’t ever… we shouldn’t have… oh my God. No. Never again. That was wrong.” I put my fingers to my lips, as though I would wipe away what had just happened, but mostly I was reminded again of the sweetness and heat of his mouth against mine. I promptly dropped my hand. “Wrong? I don’t know, Sage. Honestly, that was the most right thing that’s happened to me in a while.” Nonetheless, he kept his distance. I shook my head frantically. “How can you say that? You know how it is! There’s no… well, you know. Humans and vampires can’t… no. There can’t be anything between them. Between us.”

And what about Rose? Aren’t you madly in love with her?” Adrian looked way too calm for this situation. “Maybe I was once. But it’s been… what, nearly three months? And honestly, I haven’t thought much about her in a while. Yeah, I’m still hurt and feel kind of used, but… really, she’s not the one I’m always thinking about anymore. I don’t see her face when I go to sleep. I don’t wonder about—” “No!” I backed up even further. “I don’t want to hear this. I’m not going to listen to any more.” With a few swift steps, Adrian stood in front of me again. The wall was only a couple inches behind me, and I had nowhere to go. He made no threatening moves, but he did clasp my hands and hold them to his chest while leaning down to me. “No, you will listen. For once, you’re going to hear something that doesn’t fit into your neat, compartmentalized world of order and logic and reason. Because this isn’t reasonable. If you’re terrified, believe me—this scares the hell out of me, too. You asked about Rose? I tried to be a better person for her—but it was to impress her, to get her to want me. But when I’m around you, I want to be better because… well, because it feels right. Because I want to. You make me want to become something greater than myself. I want to excel. You inspire me in every act, every word, every glance. I look at you, and you’re like… like light made into flesh. I said it on Halloween and meant every word: you are the most beautiful creature I have ever seen walking thi...

“Why?” he asked, a slight smile on his lips. “They were damned good ones. You’re not a victim. You’re not a captive to that lily. You can be what you want. You can choose what you want.” “You’re right.” I slipped away, finding no resistance from him at all. “And I don’t choose you. That’s what you’re missing in all of this.” Adrian stilled. His smile dropped. “I don’t believe you.” I scoffed. “Let me guess. Because I kissed you back?” That kiss had made me feel more alive than I had in weeks, and I had a feeling he knew that. He shook his head. “No. Because there’s no one else out there who understands you like I do.” I waited for more. “That’s it? You’re not going to elaborate on what that means?” Those green eyes held me. “I don’t think I need to.” I had to look away, though I was unsure why. “If you know me so well, then you’ll understand why I’m leaving.” “Sydney—” I moved quickly toward the door. “Goodbye, Adrian.” I hurried toward the door, half-afraid he’d try to hold me again. If he did, I wasn’t sure I could leave. But no touch came. No effort at all was made to stop me. It wasn’t until I was halfway out on the lawn in front of his building that I dared a peek back. Adrian stood there leaning against the doorframe, watching me with his heart in his eyes. In my chest, my own heart was breaking. On my cheek, the lily reminded me who I was. I turned from him and walked away, refusing to look back.