The Eye of the Bedlam Bride (Dungeon Crawler Carl, #6)

by Matt Dinniman

I’d say this is improper at best. It’s a three-ring ass casserole at worst.

They’re really nice when they’re not trying to eat your face.

Rude-Dolph the Blood-Nosed Slay-Deer. Level 100.

Nobody is laughing at him anymore.

“Carl, do you see that?” Donut shouted. “It’s a cheap knockoff of Rudolph! He ate Santa!”

She immediately summoned a lizard thing called a Mo’o, which looked like a human-sized version of the gecko from those ridiculous car insurance commercials, though it had a spear and breathed fire.

She was probably busy licking her own butthole and got eaten by a llama.”

New Achievement! Pincushioned! You’ve had both your eyeballs pierced at the same time!

THIS BITCH IS GONNA MELT YOUR BEAUTIFUL ASS INTO BUBBLING AND STICKY OATMEAL.

Right now, I needed to get this damn crab to jerk off into the ocean.