Until Death

by Alice Wilde

My heart feels like it’s breaking over and over again with each step I take. Not just over the death of my father, but over Death himself. The loss of him at my side. The loss of my trust in him … and worst of all, the loss of what could have been. My love for him is deeper than even I had realized, and it makes what he’s done that much more unbearable. His betrayal stings deeper than anything I’ve felt before.

feel lost … starved without her by my side. Just knowing she is out of my reach is tearing me apart from the inside out, and I cannot stand the thought that her absence may stretch on indefinitely.

“Because she is everything,” I snarl. “Everything this damned world seems to have forgotten. She is all that is good, all that is worth living for. She is a light in an eternal abyss of darkness … because Hazel’s life is worth a thousand times more than any being I have ever known to walk this realm or hers.”

“Curiosity,” Cerberus says with a shrug. “I want to know for myself what kind of mortal is capable of bringing Death to his knees for her.”

Life with Death was never a possibility. It has only ever been a dream. Even if we succeeded here, and I was returned to my body, I am mortal. We wouldn’t grow old, let alone share a life together. Even if we could somehow share my life, it would be him watching me age, and eventually die. My body no longer capable of housing my soul. In the end, it would always be death.

I do not understand what has come over me, but I cannot push her from my mind. Nor do I not want to. One command, and I wanted nothing more than to obey. Two, and I wanted to lay down my life for her. A single touch, and I knew I was hers.

She must be innocent if … When I am forced to betray my king for her. My fated mate.

Even my death, the giving of my very soul, was not enough to save my father.

Would she even believe it possible that I still love Death, despite his betrayal? Or would it be safer to claim that Eros or some other man has won me over? Does it even matter who it is as long as I give her a name other than Hades? I do care for Eros, but I know it would be a lie to say that I was in love with him. Not when it is Death who still holds my heart captive. Death whom I still long for, and whose touch I crave in the darkest hours of night. And yet, it isn’t his name that falls from my lips. “Eros,” I tell her.

My own hands slip lower, and I can feel his arousal growing beneath me as my own urgency builds. Desperation starts to rise within me as my heart wars with my body, reminders of Death flickering through my mind with ever-increasing frequency. Suddenly, Eros stills at my touch.

“I cannot do this,” he says, lifting me off of him as he rises from the bed. “What?” I ask, confused. “I can hardly believe I am saying this, but I cannot claim you when your heart still so clearly cries out for another,” Eros says, with a sharp snort. “You love him, mortal, no matter how much you try to deny it. I can feel nothing but your desire for him ... and I will not take you when it is not me that you want.”

He pauses as he glances back at me, his face filled with a mixture of pain and sorrow. “Mortal,” he says, his voice suddenly so soft that I can barely hear him. “What I am trying to say is that … I love you.”

“You had better hope that we are not too late,” he snarls. “Or there will be hell to pay for every last being in this damned realm.” I scramble to my feet and race after him. Little does Death know that he is not the only one who will help raze the Underworld to the ground if we are too late to save the mortal.

Try as I might, I cannot seem to find my voice, let alone the words to tell Death how much I’ve missed him. But my tongue refuses to obey, and my heart still pangs with worry over his honesty in regard to our deal. So, instead, I savor the frosty smell of him, the concern in his eyes each time they glance down to check on me.

Somehow, I know that she is the one I am looking for. She is my missing piece. My everything.

My soul. My heart. My very existence. She is and always will be my everything, and I have finally proved it beyond a shadow of a doubt. I have loved her as only I could … Until death.