When people don’t get enough unconditional love as children, they feel terribly empty and afraid. People who feel empty and afraid can’t be happy, and they can’t have loving relationships, because they’re too busy filling their own needs and protecting themselves. You hoped your husband would love you unconditionally, but he couldn’t because he’d never been unconditionally loved himself. He, in turn, hoped you would unconditionally love him, but you couldn’t, either, because you hadn’t been unconditionally loved in your childhood. Neither of you had the love that’s required to make a
...more
