That Time I Got Drunk and Yeeted a Love Potion at a Werewolf (Mead Mishaps, #2)
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“I’ve fought an army of manticores, and the dark magic of a lich. Both tasks pale in comparison to resisting the urge to shred that gown off you and shoving my tongue down your cunt.”
Emily DeFilippo
Gaaaa dayum
23%
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“It’s a lot less painful than what your woman would go through if you put her through childbirth. You can’t expect her to go through worse pain if you yourself can’t even offer her this.”
Emily DeFilippo
Mmmmhm
55%
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“… Pies?” I asked. Of all the things I thought a dragon would ask for, sweets weren’t one of them. “You eat pies?” “No, I shove them up my ass,” he growled. “Yes, I eat them. There’s a shop on Main Street called Sonia’s Sweet Treats. I want three of her lemon meringue pies.”
Emily DeFilippo
Hahahaha
65%
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“I did,” a chipper voice came. “Name’s Alexis, nice to meet ya. I’d shake your hand, but alas, I am but a sword.”
Emily DeFilippo
Aw Alexis hahaha
71%
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A dust-covered pause filled the air. “You’re doing this because you couldn’t get bitches?” Alexis asked.
Emily DeFilippo
Hahahaha
73%
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I do not know if my tits were built for murder. I don’t even think they were built with my back in mind.
Emily DeFilippo
😂😂😂
77%
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“Oh, thank goodness!” Alexis let out a loud sigh. “I gotta be honest with ya, Big Daddy Dave. At first I was like, ‘Damn, this group looks like they jack off on crystals and kick puppies’ and then I saw y’all praying to a glowing puddle. That’s when I knew everything was gonna be OK.”
Emily DeFilippo
No im dead
78%
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“The only thing running from you is your hairline,” I hissed. “Brie, stab this balding bitch!” Alexis hollered.
Emily DeFilippo
😂😂😂🤦‍♀️
81%
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I looked around the water, checking to see if anyone else has appeared in the water. “Psycho! Who is WE? I just told you to stay the fuck away from me.”
Emily DeFilippo
😂😂😂
82%
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“I CAN MOVE!” she cried again. “I CAN MOVE AND YOU ARE ALL FUCKED!”
Emily DeFilippo
😂😂
83%
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His answer was a menacing growl. “Is that ‘grrr, yes I love you. Run away with me, light of my life’?”
Emily DeFilippo
Dead 😂😂