A Demon's Guide to Wooing a Witch (Glimmer Falls #2)

by Sarah Hawley

For all the angry girls who were told they were too much.

YESSSSSSSSSSSS.

“So Bing’s an oracle and Swifties are a species. This is perfect.”

“I hope whatever you order is vile,” she said. He gasped. “Your hostility wounds me.” Calladia bit her lip, fighting the urge to laugh. “Good. You could use some wounding.” “Is brain damage not enough for you?” “You’re still speaking, so clearly not.” Astaroth slapped a hand against his chest. “The warrior queen delivers a mortal blow.”

“I hope this witch is as beautiful, conniving, and deadly as you deserve,” Lilith said.

“Your man bun is tasteless, and your beard smells like stale chips and defeat,” he nearly screamed.

“You’re a good person, even if you don’t always believe it, but I’m not. Say the word, and I’ll punish him in the vilest ways you can imagine.”

“The best revenge is to forget him and live a happy life.” “How odd,” Astaroth said. “I always heard the best revenge was flaying a bloke alive, forcing him to eat his own liver, and lighting him on fire.” He’d recovered the edge of snark that hinted he was probably kidding. Calladia played along. “We really need to work on your conflict resolution skills.”

Had rubber ducks ever been so arousing?

“You think I’m a misogynistic fuckwad?” She blew a hank of hair out of her face, then gave him a mean smile. “They like fedoras is all I’m saying.”

Lilith blew him a kiss. “Stalking is my love language.” “I thought commissioning bounty hunters was her love language,” Calladia muttered. “And kidnapping.” Lilith turned her icy blue eyes on Calladia. “Love can be expressed in any number of ways,” she said solemnly.

Lilith should get her own book lol

“Small life, big dreams, zero fucks to give.”

Caladia in a nutshell.

“Oh, my warrior queen,” Astaroth said softly. “Has anyone ever worshipped you the way you deserve?”

Love wasn’t trying to force someone to be who you thought they should be. It was loving them as they were while supporting them on their journey toward becoming their best self.

“I’ll never get enough of you,” he said against her lips. “The sun could die and the stars could fall and the earth could rip itself apart, and none of that would matter, so long as you were in my arms.”

Astaroth is disgustingly cute.