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Iron, when prepared with the correct spellwork, helped contain Theodore’s static charge, forcing him to be more than semi-corporeal, which was the only reason he was not banned from indoor spaces. That, and he’d have complained a lot.
Theodore only had two modes: dramatic and more dramatic.
This is a great plan, Mallory, one I am very proud to have spent four seconds thinking about before I shared it.
He had protested this on the grounds of wanting distance from his place of death, but they were so very sorry, and he was so very pressured into taking it.
‘Just brainstorming. Getting you into the mindset needed to solve murders. You know, I am something of a murdered person myself,’
Theodore sighed again. ‘If I die… Oh, no, that’s already happened.’
I will need to meet this fellow, or, indeed, lady fellow, and make sure everyone… checks out.’ ‘Ah yes, the two genders.’ Cornelia rolled her eyes.
Mallory had to admire how even with ingrained faerie eloquence and an inability to lie, Ben did not excel at making sense.
When I die, I want “Diana Cheung-Merriweather, noted lesbian and motherfucking genius” on my gravestone.
And it’s fine. I’m not even upset about it. I couldn’t be less upset. Do I seem upset? As if I do, you’re wrong.’ He stood, pulling his cardigan around him. ‘If anyone needs me – which they won’t – I will be in the lab all night. In the dark. And the quiet. Alone.’
‘I’m here, I’m queer, and I’m ready to solve a murd-eer!’ Theodore announced.
‘Quickly, look professional! Do everything you can to distract from the fact I am a cat!’
Diana had put herself in charge of making tea and supplying biscuits and cake. Theodore had put himself in charge of putting them under stress.
‘I am a forensic science student. I am good at learning. I love science. This is a paper on crime scene procedure,’ Diana said mechanically. ‘I love to science good.’
‘That won’t be hard. My hunches have always been right. Except when they’ve been wrong.’
Beckett continued, as though every word he was saying were not the worst collection of words anyone had ever heard.
He’s not the best at getting words out in person.’ ‘Has he tried simply not speaking?’ Theodore asked, turning a page primly.
So let me get this straight. Or, I should say, gay.
It is not a crime to stand on a street – I have checked, it is not a crime
Diana wore entirely inappropriate shoes for the situation, but when asked, she said, ‘I can use the heels to stab someone in the neck. I don’t see what the problem is.’ Mallory could not fault her logic.

