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The best we can do is a compromise: learn to recognize situations in which mistakes are likely and try harder to avoid significant mistakes when the stakes are high. The premise of this book is that it is easier to recognize other people’s mistakes than our own.
The general theme of these findings is that the idea of money primes individualism: a reluctance to be involved with others, to depend on others, or to accept demands from others.
Can there be any doubt that the ubiquitous portraits of the national leader in dictatorial societies not only convey the feeling that “Big Brother Is Watching” but also lead to an actual reduction in spontaneous thought and independent action?
The world in our heads is not a precise replica of reality; our expectations about the frequency of events are distorted by the prevalence and emotional intensity of the messages to which we are exposed.
For some of our most important beliefs we have no evidence at all, except that people we love and trust hold these beliefs.
The brains of humans and other animals contain a mechanism that is designed to give priority to bad news.
Gottman estimated that a stable relationship requires that good interactions outnumber bad interactions by at least 5 to 1.
“You seem to be devoting your entire vacation to the construction of memories. Perhaps you should put away the camera and enjoy the moment, even if it is not very memorable?”
In normal circumstances, however, we draw pleasure and pain from what is happening at the moment, if we attend to it.
Why do these added pleasures not show up in reports of emotional experience? A plausible interpretation is that higher income is associated with a reduced ability to enjoy the small pleasures of life.
“The easiest way to increase happiness is to control your use of time. Can you find more time to do the things you enjoy doing?”
“Beyond the satiation level of income, you can buy more pleasurable experiences, but you will lose some of your ability to enjoy the less expensive ones.”
Nothing in life is as important as you think it is when you are thinking about it.
