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For all the women just waiting to be rescued by a shirtless mountain man. Here, have three instead.
Sometimes, existing in empty spaces can be fatal. But sometimes… it’s the only way to survive.
“Daddy doesn’t let me eat ice cream or go swimming, and he makes you cry. Can we stay on our own forever? Just me and you?”
I lose grip of the world and let my eyes slide shut, safe in the knowledge that if this is my deathbed, I got Arianna out of the hellhole of her childhood.
The cruelness of my life is normal to me after so long, but not to the rest of the world. I can’t let the truth slip out like that.
She stares up at me with big, blue eyes that sucker punch me right in the damn chest. I don’t usually like children—too loud and demanding—but there’s something about this tiny speck of sass and fire that I find endearing. “I missed you, giant.” I blink, taken aback. “Me?” A smile blooms across her pink lips. “Where have you been?” “Hiding, obviously.” “You’re too big and fat to hide from me!”
If she thinks it’s okay to be in pain, we’re gonna have a serious problem.
“Who did this to you?”
To my shock, he stretches out to lie down in the grass next to me. Arianna wastes no time adorning him with his own tiny daisy crown. Killian grumbles a complaint but doesn’t stop her from dressing him in flowers. “Now we match,” I whisper to him. “If anyone sees me in this shit, my reputation is ruined.” “You’re the one that laid down. Suck it up.”
“Perhaps you want me to trace every single inch of your body with my tongue, or for me to taste how wet your pussy is in this moment.” “Zach,” I gasp, embarrassed. “What?” he counters. “Don’t deny it. I can see your legs pressing together. Does it hurt, beautiful girl? Is your cunt soaking wet and begging for me to touch it?”
This is the first time a man has made me orgasm. I wonder what he’d think if he knew. Something tells me Zach would love that.
“I’m not your damn therapist. You want a wet blanket to cry on, then you’re looking at the wrong man. Need me to shoot a motherfucker, or skin a dead deer, I’m all over it.”
mood
“I want you too,” she reveals. “That’s the truth.” My entire world ends with those words. Reality breaks. My lungs seize. The cabin narrows into a snapshot, until it’s just the two of us and nothing else even exists.
Don’t run, baby. Not from me.”
Let me hold you. When you wake up screaming, I’ll be there. I’ll fight your demons for as long as you need me to.” “Do you promise?” Willow whimpers. “I swear on my fucking life. No one will ever hurt you again.”
Killian would never hurt me. The safest place in the world is right here.
“You belong to me now. I’m the only man you’re allowed to think of when I’m buried in your cunt.”
My grief defies reason, no matter the logical arguments I try to talk myself into believing.
But I’m still mourning. Pain doesn’t always make sense. Sometimes, it just… is.
“You’re here,” I say sleepily. He tosses another log on the fire. “I didn’t want to paint.” “Why not?” “Because Arianna needed me, and I wanted to be with you. That’s more important to me than some stupid paint pallets.”
“You’re human,” he whispers. “Being human doesn’t make sense.” “What do you mean?” “We mourn things that don’t exist and chase dreams that will never materialise. We cry when we’re happy and laugh when we’re sad. Our whole existence is imperfect.”
But believe me when I tell you that you’re allowed to mourn.”
“Even if it hurts?” “Even if it hurts,” he confirms.
Maybe, I’m allowed to mourn. It’s okay to embrace the pain that brings, as long as I remember to come back to life when the time for grieving is done. I have to live.
Being a twenty-four year old virgin who lives on a fucking mountain hasn’t afforded me much experience with women, especially not in the bedroom department.
Utterly and powerlessly in love.
“You’ve grown your angel wings now.” I grant myself a tiny smile. “Say hello to Pedro for me. I hope he’s keeping you company up there. We’ll see you one day.”
“Broken wings can still fly.
“Head over fucking heels, babe. I don’t give a shit about whether I have to share you. All I want is the privilege of owning a piece of your heart.”
“Ikea doesn’t know how to build shit. I can do a better job myself.”
“Come back, baby.”
Before I cared too much. Before I let people get close. Before I opened myself up to pain.
I spot the razor I used to shave my legs this morning. A tiny, whispered voice calls out to me in sinister slithers. I haven’t heard it for a long time. Take control, Willow.
Mr Sanchez isn’t hurting me anymore. Now, I’m in charge. I’m hurting myself.
I don’t want them to see me like this, but I have no strength to hold it in anymore. This is the real me, beneath the smiles and bravado. This is the person they love.
He knows. He doesn’t hate me. He isn’t disgusted. He… is me.
I barely flinch as he douses the cuts on my arm in bottled antiseptic and presses a cotton ball against the flow of blood. My pain tolerance is scarily high.
“I can’t fucking lose you. Not like this.”
While the other two demand physical possession of my heart, Micah’s content to sneak into the darkest corners of my mind and set up shop in the shadows.
Micah strokes the inside of my ankle. “Rest, Willow.” “You’re not alone,” Zach murmurs. Killian grunts in agreement. “We’re here.”
I falter and lose my nerve. I’m going with what feels right, but if I somehow trigger her, I’ll never forgive myself.
“I fucking love the bones of you.”
I’m in love with every single part of you.”
“That’s why you have to hold on, angel. Hold the hell on and never let go of those who matter. We can make it. I know we will.”
Welcome to Briar fucking Valley.”
