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“I’ve been thinking about it, and I feel like I deserve to get railed this weekend.”
It’s not just school—the perpetual fear of failure—that weighs me down. My thoughts inevitably wander to my parents. For the most part, I try to keep them from entering my panicky, late-night thought spirals.
It’s awful, feeling like I can’t ever shut off my thoughts. I’m worrying and fretting over shit that doesn’t even matter. Things that are way far out of my control. And then, of course, there are things that I deserve to be concerned over, but not to such a drastic degree.
“Sick like I wanna pull all my hair out.”
Honest
to God, I don’t think a willing college girl has ever had this much trouble getting herself laid.
It’s pathetic how easily I’m reduced to tears lately.
But most of all, I’m angry with myself for not measuring up to my own expectations.

