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She tightens her grip on my hand as I move to leave, and her eyes search mine, silently pleading with me to stay. Without hesitation, I nod and shed my clothes, climbing into bed beside her. She snuggles into my chest, her warm breath tickling my skin, and I wrap my arms around her, holding her close.
But now, being with him feels like the most natural thing in the world. He’s become my safe haven, my lighthouse in the storm.
Holden squeezes my hand under the table, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. “That’s my girl,” he says, voice low, an endearment meant just for me.
I’m struck by how lucky I am to have found her. She’s strong, intelligent, and fiercely loyal. She has this carefully concealed inner light—secret sunlight for a soul—and she’s not afraid to stand up for what she believes in. Despite our differences, I couldn’t have asked for someone better suited for me.
She’s the epitome of perfection, and she’s all mine.
“We can both shine this weekend. But I also won’t apologize if I naturally shine brighter.” “So happy you’re willing to share the stage with me, Karras.” “Anything for you, Becker.”
“Ah, another compliment from Kaia.” “Hey, I compliment you sometimes.” “Sure you do,” I tease, curling my finger underneath the strap of her dress. “With a thinly veiled insult thrown in for good measure.”
“Okay.” My lip curls up into a smirk. She’s trying so hard to be serious right now, but the way she crosses her arms over her chest and purses her lips just makes her look even more adorable. A hint of a smile tugs at the corners of her mouth, and it only serves to make me grin wider. “Kaia, baby, will you please be my girlfriend?” “No,” she says simply, settling back onto the bed. My brows shoot up. “Excuse me?” “Ask me again later.” She tilts her chin, glancing away from me in a shoddy attempt to hide her smile. “Ask me again when it’s not an afterthought.” “Impossible. Fucking. Girl.”
Her laughter quickly devolves into a high-pitched series of shrieks, and they may be shrill and piercing, but damn do I love the sound of them anyway. Honestly, I’m just happy she can finally let her guard down like this. And even happier that I get to be the one to make her feel this way—joyful, carefree, and fully fucking alive.
And as we finish getting ready, I’m all sorts of happy inside—enveloped in my little cocoon—warm and content with the golden boy beside me. I’ve grown attached to these little moments with him. The pockets of time where we can be completely ourselves, free from the confines of our daily lives.
I miss the way her hazel eyes spark when she’s excited about something, the way she scrunches her nose when she’s deep in thought, and the warmth of her hand as it fits perfectly into mine. I miss the conversations we’ve shared late into the night, discussing everything from our dreams and aspirations to the trivial, everyday moments that make up our lives. I miss the way she challenges me, pushing me back when I piss her off.
I want to see her in the stands, wearing my jersey, cheering me on like the other girlfriends do for my teammates. It’s not only about her being present—it’s about having her as a part of my life, a part of this world that I’m so passionate about. I know that she appreciates and supports me, but having her physically there, sharing in the excitement and the tension of the game, would mean more than I can put into words.
“Fuck, Kaia,” I rasp, unable to keep my emotions in check. “You’ve been treating this relationship like we’re living on a fault line, ready to destruct at a moment’s notice.
About halfway through the game, during an intermission between periods, Rai points me out in the stands. I watch, shaking in my boots, as Holden’s gaze follows his friend’s finger. And when our eyes finally meet, I can see the happiness that overwhelms him in spades. A broad, genuine smile lights up his face, and it melts the ice inside my chest. He skates right up to the glass that separates us and waves enthusiastically, brown eyes sparkling.
“Karras,” he says, amusement lacing his tone. “Who would’ve thought I’d find you roughing it in Hanford.” I breathe a sigh of relief, lips curling into a smile. “I’m willing to make exceptions for you.”
“Trying to impress me, Beck?” “You know I always am.”
That I adore you, that all your flaws are what make you whole.”
“I just didn’t want you to see this side of me, I guess. All the broken parts that I’m still trying to put back together.” “I get that. But Kaia, I don’t need you to be perfect. All I want from you is your trust.” “And you have it. Do I have yours?” “You do.”
“It’s not a waste if it makes you happy.” “You’re ridiculous, you know that?” “But you like me anyway,” he retorts, pulling me close and pressing a tender kiss to my forehead.
“You’re thinking too much into it, Kaia. I’ll get you another orchid. I’ll get you fifty orchids, or tulips, or daisies, or whatever fucking flowers you want.”
“I love you.” “I love you, too,” she whispers back, her voice full of contentment, and it feels like I’m in fucking heaven.
“And I really fucking like you, just as much as I love you. Always have, and always will.”
“You think you’d want to be my girlfriend now?” As I pull away from him, shocked laughter spills free. After all this time together—all the hours we’ve spent confessing our feelings, our fears, and our hopes for the future—we’re well past the stage of defining the relationship. “You know what, Becker? Ask me again when it’s not an afterthought.”
“Hey, Karras,” I say, my voice steady despite the pounding of my heart. “Yeah?” she asks, not bothering to turn around, her eyes still glued to the stars. “I know you’ve got a lot going on right now, but do you think you’d be at all interested in marrying me?”
I can’t imagine my life without you, and I never fucking want to. You’re my rock, my inspiration, my everything.”

